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Original poster

The UK is about to enter a nightmare much darker than anyone yet realises

88 replies

EdwinH · 04/07/2024 09:40

Allister Heath has written an article in the Telegraph couched in dire, apocalyptic language. It's all about what would happen if the LibDems managed to overtake the Tories and form the Opposition instead.

(That's something the polls suggest is unlikely but still possible. They're much, much closer than at any previous election. So it's not just fantasy.)

The thing is, depending on your political stance, what he is describing could be considered brilliant rather than a horror story.

Judge for yourself. See what you think...

The link below goes to the archived version of the article, which is not paywalled.
archive.ph/2024.07.03-224711/www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2024/07/03/uk-to-enter-nightmare-much-darker-than-anyone-realises/#selection-2803.4-2803.77

OP posts:
Summerhillsquare · 04/07/2024 11:33

Don't threaten me with a good time little Ally.

crackofdoom · 04/07/2024 11:33

What most impresses me about that article is its sober, measured language 😆😆😆😆

ALovelyCupOfNameChange · 04/07/2024 11:30

Spinet · 04/07/2024 11:19

Do you remember when the education minister did this?

Heard her on the radio yesterday. What a beacon of fantastic politics she is. Always fighting for the vulnerable. 1 person at a time. As this photo shows

HauntedBungalow · 04/07/2024 11:29

What a superb article. You can almost pinpoint the sentence where the self-loathing grief wank turns to tears.

Abhannmor · 04/07/2024 11:27

TooBigForMyBoots · 04/07/2024 10:40

Did someone drop acid?👾👹👾👹👾

Alistair on the phone to Michael Gove : 'Govey , that stuff you gave me? It made me write the most hysterical nonsense!'

Combattingthemoaners · 04/07/2024 11:23

Give over with the scare mongering. We have had 14 years of dross and the vast majority are ready for it to come to an end.

Spinet · 04/07/2024 11:19

Do you remember when the education minister did this?

The UK is about to enter a nightmare much darker than anyone yet realises
skyfalldown · 04/07/2024 11:00

‘Labour, cheered on by the supposed Lib Dem opposition, would be emboldened to move faster and further in a socialist and woke direction.’

The use of the word ‘woke’ instantly tells me that I can disregard this man’s inane opinion.

TooBigForMyBoots · 04/07/2024 10:40

Did someone drop acid?👾👹👾👹👾

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 04/07/2024 10:34

I can’t wait! ‘Left wing stormtroopers’ 😂😂😂😂

The Telegraph is pathetic, it’s struggling to survive. It can’t even find anyone to own it.

That paper and the party it supports are finished. We’re entering a much better era.

LikeWhoUsesTypewritersAnyway · 04/07/2024 10:34

Nah, the darkest times are behind us. Good times lie ahead. Smile

GingerPirate · 04/07/2024 10:32

That's what I have been saying to my (three decades older) dear husband.
He doesn't seem to give a crap, and really, why should he? (75 yo, very well off).
I keep suggesting moving away to my country of origin (I have never been destitute myself), however, my condition is to live in an apartment where all the services are paid for (currently my job), upkeep etc.
Seems a massive problem.
But then, do I wanna uproot someone of this age?
Is it really gonna be that much worse here? Ugh.
Apologies for the rant, first world problems.

Bollindger · 04/07/2024 10:32

Well all the people who think the land of milk and honey is coming are in for a shock...
Interest rates will rise soon.
Labour have plans to take your inheritance.
Plus they will say the Torys took the PIP payments away, bet they don't stop it, as it would cost them.
I agree drain the swap, for the Torys, I look forward to the next election when we finally get some backbone in the candidates.
Plus you don't need to feed the fish once you catch it...

RafaistheKingofClay · 04/07/2024 10:31

The Telegraph have quite comically really lost the plot over the last fortnight. (More so than over the last decade). They seem to be really panicking and I love to see it.

There was a brilliant headline about how Labour are going to suck all the joy out of everything over the weekend.

SeriaMau · 04/07/2024 10:29

The reality is much more prosaic. Most extreme prediction over the course of the government is 1p extra on tax, increased CGT, increased IHT, perhaps little improvement in the NHS, inflation up at 3%, but with more affordable housing, and a rent freeze. Not quite the zombie apocalypse.

Shortfatsuit · 04/07/2024 10:27

IfImOnFire · 04/07/2024 10:23

Truly one of the most exciting paragraphs I've ever read, what a beautiful vision. Can I nominate particular Tories?

Show quote history

Yeah, I want to nominate a few too!

There's going to be a lot of schadenfreude in the next 24 hours! Grin

ChockysChimichanga · 04/07/2024 10:23

What an absolute load of shite.

IfImOnFire · 04/07/2024 10:23

Canadian876 · 04/07/2024 10:06

The likely scale of the defeat will be crushing for remaining Tory MPs. Former top ministers will become obscure non-entities overnight. They will lose their ministerial cars and special advisers, and many will become the butt of jokes. Nobody will care what they say or do. Few will even return their calls.

My heart bleeds for them! Grin

Truly one of the most exciting paragraphs I've ever read, what a beautiful vision. Can I nominate particular Tories?

Renamed · 04/07/2024 10:20

This guy is certifiable

Pikapikapikachu11 · 04/07/2024 10:17

Shortfatsuit · 04/07/2024 10:11

When the Torygraph journalists and readers start to really panic, you know it's good news.

I really do hope it is good news.

If anything, for my dad and family abd others families who had to see loved ones suffer without being by their sides,whilst sunak and bojo and their cronies partied.

Still makes my blood boil.

blackcherryconserve · 04/07/2024 10:16

HappierTimesAhead · 04/07/2024 09:56

British politics is about to be turned into an infernal, soul-destroying hellscape worthy of the sickest of Hollywood minds

What a nutter! 😂

Just when we might be entering a time with a Government with energy he comes up with this ridiculous scenario? He'd be better of telling the French that as they are abut to elect a Far Right Government. Or even, he could just move there.

Pikapikapikachu11 · 04/07/2024 10:15

EdwinH · 04/07/2024 09:54

Have you not been following all the polls? They have them within a handful of seats of the Tories, or even at parity.

Why? Because Labour, the LibDems and Greens are chipping away at the Tories from one side, and Reform from the other. Net result: the Tory vote is going to be way, way down in many constituencies.

Show quote history

That's brilliant news though! Corrupt party... whilst I couldn't support my dad dying of cancer, they partied and lied about it! All the brexit lies, ruining it for mere mortals to get on property ladder due to messing up mortgage rates

The nhs.

List goes on. 14 years....

Do you enjoy being ruled bg lies of bojo and sunak? Having jrm falling asleep in commons?

Shortfatsuit · 04/07/2024 10:11

When the Torygraph journalists and readers start to really panic, you know it's good news.

HappierTimesAhead · 04/07/2024 10:10

Canadian876 · 04/07/2024 10:06

The likely scale of the defeat will be crushing for remaining Tory MPs. Former top ministers will become obscure non-entities overnight. They will lose their ministerial cars and special advisers, and many will become the butt of jokes. Nobody will care what they say or do. Few will even return their calls.

My heart bleeds for them! Grin

Indeed and what does he mean '*will become the butt of jokes'?! The whole party is already a laughing stock

Canadian876 · 04/07/2024 10:06

The likely scale of the defeat will be crushing for remaining Tory MPs. Former top ministers will become obscure non-entities overnight. They will lose their ministerial cars and special advisers, and many will become the butt of jokes. Nobody will care what they say or do. Few will even return their calls.

My heart bleeds for them! Grin