Best friend turned nasty & aggressive

I never want to come here to flame people but I don't think you two are compatible at all. If she isn't generally a rude person and she reacted like this, it just goes to show you are totally different people. I work with people who have been most affected by the Tories for the past ten years and if anyone I know voted Tory we could never be friends again because we are fundamentally incompatible.

It is an anxious time for those of us who mistrust Boris Johnson and his fellow right-wingers.

Maybe speaking about this with your friend, when drinks are involved, is not a good idea.

She sees dreadful consequences of having this tory Government, and has jumped to the conclusion that you voted in favour of those dreadful consequences.
Or that you have very little idea of what you were voting for.

Beautifulstranger I totally agree. I don't know why people would think it's a troll, it seems like a very scenario to me given what I've seen from my friends online the past few weeks. And I'm saying that as someone with extreme left views.

I fell out with my best friend in almost the same circumstances last week, we have now agreed to never talk politics again

Jesus, I'm sorry you had this reaction, OP.

I'm friends with plenty of people whose politics are worlds away from mine because we're mature enough to recognise that good, decent people who want a good, decent society can fundamentally disagree about how to achieve it.

I tend to plead the Chartist principle of secret ballot when asked how I vote by people I don't know well, though, because someone will always feel the need to 'put you right' no matter how you voted. Plus it's none of their business!

But if the result you want is less racism, a safer future for Britain, more support for the vulnerable, an NHS - why shouldn’t people decry what’s happening

How can any one say they want more support for the vulnerable, a safer future whilst going on line and attacking people for their beliefs and for voting differently to them or actively supporting those who do.

It's the most illogical, ironic thing I've ever seen.

The vote won't change, the tories won. That's it. Shouting. Screaming. Stamping your feet. Attacking people will not change it.

Really suck it up.

I have very liberal political views but I absolutely hate this polarisation and people throwing insults at each other. It's going to get us absolutely nowhere if we can't respect each other. I've seen some of my friends write very hateful and nasty things on fb and honestly that effects how I feel about them more than any difference in politics would.

This is a troll I'm sure.

why shouldn’t people decry what’s happening?!

People have very right to express disappointment, sadness, anger at the result. However, hurling abuse at people and making ridiculous generalisations like "they want poor people to die, they're evil scum" is achieving nothing except alienating people and keeping them on the opposite side. Ive said this before and I'll say it again- this approach IS. NOT. WORKING. If it was working, then we would have won wouldn't we? The more we spew hatred and abuse, the more people will see us as the enemy and will vote in opposition. Our responses are keeping people voting Tory. The definition of madness is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result. If hatred and vitriol isn't working then the answer isn't to spew more of it. Its to change our approach and win people to our side. If we dont do that, we'll be stuck with the Tories for a long, long time.

doubt one vote would make a difference to the eventual result.
I’d be angry if this was your dithery attitude to voting, undecided and you choose Tory 🙄
Enjoy your dictatorship and the increasing rich/poor divide, enjoy your drinks with the gals 🙄

But if the result you want is less racism, a safer future for Britain, more support for the vulnerable, an NHS - why shouldn’t people decry what’s happening?!

And just to add that this intolerance that the hard left are showing for any opposing view is going to drive ordinary people away from the left

I'd agree with this, it's almost guaranteed to kill what's left of labour of it continues, all that will be left is a very niche small minority party supported by some hard core socialists that people try to actively avoid.

And just to add that this intolerance that the hard left are showing for any opposing view is going to drive ordinary people away from the left. Extremism is no good, whether it’s left or right

Completely agree. Apparently, some people only respect democracy when they get the result they want.

Oh and it’s not ‘leftist extremism’ to feel that the Tories are morally bankrupt and a dismal prospect.

Boris Johnson is racist and sexist. He’s pushing forward Brexit which is fuelled by sanctioned racism (and I know not all leave voters are racist or motivated by this before you start the teeth gnashing). He will sell the NHS and destroy public services further. Britain will be broken by Brexit to a terrifying extent.

The OP’s friend has ever right to be horrified her friend voted for that.

And just to add that this intolerance that the hard left are showing for any opposing view is going to drive ordinary people away from the left. Extremism is no good, whether it’s left or right.

The sheer level of vitriol coming from the left is appalling. I'm fifty years old and I don't recall ever seeing grown adults behaving like this in my life time. Even some of the responses on here are shocking.

Op. I don't really understand why a sub sect of society has started to behave like this, like nasty bullying children who didn't get their way, but you need to acccept she has this side to her, as unpleasant as it is.

Go to the drinks and your plan is good, if it looks like it is going to get nasty, hold your calm, don't react, don't let them attack you, just walk away and wish them a merry Xmas.

I think it shows great immaturity and ignorance to write off such a large swath of the population by labelling them "greedy, selfish, dont care if people die" etc. I know people who were life time labour supporters who voted Tory with gritted teeth because they were genuinely concerned about the economy under Corbyn. If your friend cannot be around you without flinging insults and abuse then leave her to it. I'd simply distance myself from her and see what happens. I wouldn't put myself in a position where I'm going to be abused and picked on- what the hell is that going to achieve??? I'd be giving her a lot of space and withdrawing. If she cannot be around anyone who voted Tory then she is going to find life extremely challenging since so many people voted that way.
I say all of this as someone who supports labour.

She voted Tory, not BNP! The current tories are (and I know the left find this difficult to stomach) a centre right party - she hasn’t revealed herself as a fascist/racist/whatever else, so I think her friends needs to grow up!

I’d get rid of her as a friend. I’d describe the choice between Boris Johnson and Jeremy Corbyn as “bad” or “worse”. So much so that I didn’t vote. Anyway if she won’t allow you to have your democratic vote without persecuting you then you should dump her. I am not quite sure why it is OK to persecute Tory voters. I mean (and I want to emphasise that I did NOT vote Tory) Jeremy Corbyn has been buddies with lots of terrorists, including IRA. He was a thoroughly inappropriate leader for this reason as well as many others and the result (including the loss of seats that had always been labour) proved this beyond doubt.

Even if your friend “comes round” I’d reconsider being friends with someone who thinks it ok to attack you like that.

There’s quite a few voters who turned from Labour as the policies were bad for the economy. Labour needs to learn from this not friends turn away from each other.

Whatever her reasons, she still voted Tory. And it has made her friend reassess her and who she is, with good reason.

A colleague I used to know and like (don’t work together anymore) revealed they vote UKIP. I have lost all respect and never want to speak to them again. They went on a bit about immigration and wanting to ‘get them out’ and it disgusted me.

Oh come off it! The OP has said she voted Tory because she believed it would be better for the economy, that’s hardly the same as saying “get them out”.

I find it quite difficult to believe that this is your closest friend who you have presumably known very well for years, but politics has never come up before?

I don’t blame her for feeling like that about you. She’s seen a side of you she didn’t know was there.

You’re behaving as if she’s suddenly turned on you for no reason, but you gave her a big reason.

A colleague I used to know and like (don’t work together anymore) revealed they vote UKIP. I have lost all respect and never want to speak to them again. They went on a bit about immigration and wanting to ‘get them out’ and it disgusted me.

This whole ‘reluctant’ vote thing is utter bullshit. You’re an adult and you made a clear choice. Now she is making a choice based on new information,