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Original poster

Let's get down to the base nitty gritty of the election. Shag, marry or cliff? Ed, Dave or Nick?

189 replies

MardyBra · 06/04/2015 11:31

I'm assuming Nigel will just be bruised by barge poles.

OP posts:
QuietChocolateEggHuntingPerson · 06/04/2015 12:23

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
MardyBra · 06/04/2015 12:23

That one in Broadchurch would do the trick.

OP posts:
TSSDNCOP · 06/04/2015 12:22

A very large one Honey.

The largest we can find.

Coumarin · 06/04/2015 12:22

Shag Ed
Marry Nick
Cliff Dave

[

HopOnTheMonnerBus · 06/04/2015 12:20

Marry Dave
Shag Nick and Nigel
Cliff Ed

HoneySwampDragonInMourning · 06/04/2015 12:20

Also do we do the shag before or after we've done the marry?

MadisonMontgomery · 06/04/2015 12:19

Cliff - Ed. Shag - Nick. Marry - Dave. For no other reason than I saw a pic of him doing his daughters hair & he looked pretty good at it. I do hate doing my own hair Grin

HoneySwampDragonInMourning · 06/04/2015 12:19

Which Cliff are we pushing them off?

DarylDixonsDarlin · 06/04/2015 12:18

Marry Ed
Shag Nick
Regret marrying Ed and wish id gone for Nick instead
Cliff Dave
Ed would find out about my affair with Nick and they would fight, at the edge of the cliff, and both fall off to join Dave in a grisly death at the bottom of the cliff.

Problem solved Grin

Oodear · 06/04/2015 12:15

There's some good thinking on here, hadn't thought of infiltrating the government via marriage. Hmm
had thought of marrying Ed as he appears to be a pushover

Mrscurlywurly83 · 06/04/2015 12:14

Shag Dave, Marry Nick. I wouldn't go as far to push Ed off a cliff but I would avoid him lol Bloody hell I'm gonna be able to look at Cameron the same again after writing this lol

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 06/04/2015 12:14

Probably shag all 3 if that were an option. Easter Grin
Marry Ed
Shag Nick
Off the cliff. Bye bye Dave

Original poster
MardyBra · 06/04/2015 12:13

"Why is Nigel Not an option."

I'd assumed everyone would just cliff him anyone.

Does anyone want to 'fess up to a bit of Nigel-love?

OP posts:
TSSDNCOP · 06/04/2015 12:08

In which case I'd marry Nick, then very quickly shag Dave (which I agree overall is the least worst option) and get caught by the papers so Nick would make me leave. Hurrah!

Viviennemary · 06/04/2015 12:07

Why is Nigel Not an option. Grin I think I'd pass on all of them tbh.

FryOneFatManic · 06/04/2015 12:03

Shag Dave - whatever the politics he looks more likely than the other two.
Marry Nick - he's vaguely passable
Cliff Ed - I absolutely just couldn't dtd with him, he's a real turn off for me.

Nigel - a cattle prod sounds good. Or perhaps you could stand him next to the cliff and blast an air horn in his ear so it startles him into jumping off himself.

TSSDNCOP · 06/04/2015 12:03

Push Ed off cliff, be sent to prison and avoid other options.

Knowing my luck though I'd get a judge trying to avoid making the same choice and he'd make me do the marry/shag bit as my punishment.

PeteCampbellsRecedingHairline · 06/04/2015 11:59

what Egg said.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 06/04/2015 11:55

*500!

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 06/04/2015 11:54

Hmm, what a question?! Shock

I would:

Push Nigel off a cliff with a cattle-prod (can I use one of those? It would hurt more, is my thinking)

Shag Ed. Motilium is really great for general nausea and I'd probably only need 5 tablets as opposed to 50 with the other two.

Marry Dave. Reason? He thinks he's so handsome and wonderful that nobody could ever think they married him for any other reason. He'd never suspect that I was infiltrating his government, getting policy advice from MN and then re-writing them ALL and laying them before Parliament, having lobbied the Queen to be a bit more active... I mean, she had Sadam Hussein to tea once so she does take a bit of notice of her politicians, I'm sure it wasn't her choice.

Anyway, once I'd completed all that, I'd find the gorgeous Donald Sutherland and start a torrid and highly publicised affair with him to take Dave down a peg or twenty... and then divorce him or poison him, whichever.

ouryve · 06/04/2015 11:53

Shag Nick, marry Ed, nail Dave to the cliff, cover him in honey and set some ants on him.

Original poster
MardyBra · 06/04/2015 11:51

I suppose I should I offer the choice of Nicola, Natalie or Leanne for those who'd prefer a choice of women.

OP posts:
EggcidentalAnarchist · 06/04/2015 11:50

Shag Nick - though I imagine he'd be feeble and apologise a lot
Marry Ed (apparently he's better looking in the flesh!) - that would give me access to his brother Easter Grin
Beat Dave to death using Farage (who also dies in the process)
Fin

pigsinmud · 06/04/2015 11:45

Shag Dave
Marry Nick
Cliff Ed

Original poster
MardyBra · 06/04/2015 11:43

Oh shit viva. Didn't think about that.

If you are reading Daily Mail reporters you lazy feckers, this is JUST FOR FUN. Us "ladies" can do serious debate too. Well some of us.

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