Just been on a course about new benefit system

Priceless

Amber - no more than i have already.

Amber I'd love to know which school he works at. yes. its a great school. it was failing when he started but now it is now on its way to getting the highest ofsted rating. well done to him and all the teachers and TAs. all their years of hard work has paid off.

turning round a failing london school is no easy task, but this is obviously one of the many changes needed to created a more equal society, however it is real change & will make improved the educational outcomes for hundreds/thousands of children in the next few years (its one of the largest primaries in the UK).

unfortunately some of the parents are not able to work with the school when their DCs have behavioural problems. this increases their chance of educational underachievement. it?s also really sad that the staff can see primary aged children start to engage in criminality (e.g. organised shoplifting, gang membership). sometimes their parents do not help the situation & there is only so much the school can do.

yes the ethnic make up of the school staff should better reflect the community they serve. the problem is that you can only hire from the pool of candidates who apply for a role, and if few apply because its a crap school, chances are they will be white and the balance wont change. however you get more people to apply for the jobs by making the school more successful, then you have a greater chance of being able to hire a better reflection of the local community.

i am not justifying myself anymore - like it or dont.

Err hello! Are you gonna answer mine?

Your husband is a headmaster of a primary school.
That does not mske you an expert on the lives of black youths in the city.

now i hae answered your question, will you answer mine?

Dps family are anglo Indian so experience racism themselves

Why did you say the above?

and why you think race comes in to this?

i am talking about parents not helping their children get the best from education. can you explain why you think racism comes in to this?

Ok so your white educated HT DH doesnt in fact have any experience of racism does he?!

I'd love to know which school he works at.

thumbwitch - i dont think i do PA, A yes but not on this occaision.

DP is white but my MIL is indian so DPs father & SM experience racism. they live in a village in the north where everyone else is white.

his step brothers are young asian men & in my area of london the police stop asian men more than black men.

of course i am not 'an expert on the lives of working class black families in the inner cities' but then neither am i an expert on white women living in london, i am just one of the many.

DP on the other hand is an expert in turning around failing inner london schools and his comments on parents failing their own children are relevant.

Oo, that's the second time I've seen a PA being used - is it the new version of the PA ?

this is fun isnt it, why dont you just make up some more things about me? it is obviously what you want to do....

Yes but you have to want to.
Nothing is stopping her apart from her own narratives.....

YoYo - there isn't a finite amount of sympathy and compassion in the world! We can generate it ourselves. And it isn't a competition either. You can feel compassion for all involved.

So does he regularly get pulled over by the police?

Being Anglo Indian and all?

Yes its odd because you are bullshitting your way through it.

This is a very odd conversation. Dps family are anglo Indian so experience racism themselves. He deals with lots of parents who hinder their own dcs chances. You can pretend its otherwise if it fits your own narratives....

That man got shot 5 mins from where I am sitting now.
I pass that spot 2-3 times a week.

I didn't sit slack jawed and tittilated when it ll kicked off.
I despaired for the future of my kids.
Does your middle aged husband get pulled over regularly by the police on his way home from work?

Bollocks.
YOU have no idea.
Your husband is a headmaster of a primary school.
That does not mske you an expert on the lives of black youths in the city.
I have four black boys and the moment they achieve any independence they are subject to horrendous pressure from outside influences. I can do all I can, like the families o the majority of kids round here. But I cannot guarantee that none of my boys will be involved in gang activity. I can hope and pray he don't.
You cannot possibly understand
Because if you did, you wouldn't be saying the things you are
And your DP shouldn't be talking to his wife about confidential matters. If he thinks the issue is as simple as he is telling you, he shouldn't be in the job.

I have lost a child. A beautiful innocent child. When I see the faces of the parents who have lost their 'bad' boys I see the same grief, the same agony as I feel.

I feel nothing horror at th loss of yet another young life. Echo are you to say that a year down the line that young boy might have found his feet and got himself together?

You know who caused me the most trouble? The spoilt, entitled, indulged and bounderyless middle class kids who my ds fell in with.

There was us trying to kep him safe and their parent's laid back attitude to drinking, drugs and under age sex made our job as hard as hell.
Difference was those kids had parents who could whisk tem away when things got hot, pay for abortions, send them out of the area, bail them out etc.

But who gets the blame for the world's ills?
Mothers of black boys.

I know what they were doing with him. Do you?

Al, so what do you think the police were doing with md?

Its why the Stephen Lawrence investigation was such a shambles

No its one very small reason why it was a shambles actually. The main reason was police corruption.

Your DP runs a school? You mean he is a head teacher?

I'm pretty sure mark duggan didn't even have a criminal record. But because of the shit the police put out there to influence idiots who see a black man and think the worst you think his family don't deserve any sympathy.

Shame on you.

Yes to what mrsDevere says. If a black or mixed race boy is killed their grieving family has the added worry of people just seeing a dead black boy and assuming the rest.

Its obviously wrong when someone is assumed to be a gang member because they are black. Its why the Stephen Lawrence investigation was such a shambles.

but yes i have limited sympathy for his family. Dp deals with the parents of children who join gangs when at primary school and they are part of the problem/ the problem.

You ave limited sympathy for his family
Are you serious?
A mother has her so shot dead in the street but you have limited sympathy because he wasn't a nice enough person?

Note you say alleged.

Are you suggesting his mother, grandmother etc were involved in gangs too? Is that why you feel their loss of a child is less worthy?

That sort of attitude is what forces grieving families of black and mixed race boys to have to deny any gang connections to the press.
Their chid is slaughtered and the first thing they have to do is to confirm to the waiting public that their child's death is a tragedy because he was a good boy.

My son's friend was murdered. Forced under a fucking bus. His family had to make sure the world knew he wasn't in a gang.
For 2 reasons.
He was black and he lived in east London.

Shame.