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Original poster

drug dependant baby, advice needed

734 replies

EarthMotherImNot · 03/03/2010 15:20

I've been asked to foster a baby expected to be suffering drug withdrawal when it is born next week.

It is years since I've cared for one of these and any advice would be most gratefully received.

OP posts:
PurplePillow · 15/04/2010 10:03

AWWWW that is sooo lovely

Original poster
EarthMotherImNot · 15/04/2010 09:56

Thanks everyone

6 weeks old today and she gave us a gift
Having a cuddle with her this morning, just the two of us with Dh snoring in the background and she looked at me and smiled, the most awesome wonderful smile.

It took my breath away! Sometimes, just sometimes, this job is such a joy

OP posts:
Minnerva · 14/04/2010 19:37

Wonderful to read the update-keep up the good work and thanks again for the regular postings,they are much appreciated by us all.
Love
Minnerva

bumpybecky · 14/04/2010 12:42

fantastic progress since I last read this thread huge big round of applause to you and your DH EMIN, so glad to hear your baby is doing so well

MrsRigby · 13/04/2010 21:30

Well done earthmotherimnot, keep up the good work .

CMOTdibbler · 13/04/2010 11:18

Wooot ! Sounds like she is making really good progress now . Am sure that now she isn't expending lots of energy on crying/shaking/being awake too much, she'll be piling on the weight.

Original poster
EarthMotherImNot · 13/04/2010 11:15

Health visitor just been to weigh lo and she is...........drum roll

7lbs 5ozs yeayyyyyyyyyy, she is actually on the centile chart now

She is sleeping a lot better and is alert when awake, not crying anywhere near the amount she was. She will be six weeks old on Thursday and by god we're proud of her

OP posts:
PurplePillow · 13/04/2010 09:25

Just found this thread and I too think you are an amazing woman for what you have done for this poor wee soulvery lucky little baby

MilkNoSugarPlease · 13/04/2010 08:35

EMIN your amazing.

simple.

Original poster
EarthMotherImNot · 09/04/2010 13:00

I'm back phew

I managed to contain myself, actually the mum presented as an extremely fragile and pathetic person.

She thanked me for caring so well for lo and for sending her photo's from time to time.

She has so many issues that my life seems blessed in comparison

Lo is doing great, she had an unsettled night but otherwise seems fine and very alert

OP posts:
MrsRigby · 09/04/2010 10:02

Can't you just give in to your base instinct. I'm pretty sure all the social workers et al will be supportive of your outburst .

Once again, I just want to tell you what a wonderful person you are. It makes me so happy to know that that baby finally has someone like yourself to look after them.

I was hoping there would be no more posts as this thread makes me so and .

I trust the little one is still doing well and continues to do so.

Thank god for people like you in the world.

CMOTdibbler · 09/04/2010 09:24

I'll be sitting on my hands with a rictus smile for you EMIN. Whilst totally sympathising with your base instinct.

How is the LO doing ?

Original poster
EarthMotherImNot · 09/04/2010 09:17

Ok need some help here, this is what you have to do for me please.

At 10am this morning I will be meeting lo's mum for the first time at a review.

It would be most unfortunate if I gave in to my base instinct of grabbing her by the throat and slapping her silly, given that the room will be full of social workers etc

Could you all please (metaphorically) sit on my hands and hold my oh so sincere smile in place.

I thank you

OP posts:
PandaEis · 07/04/2010 14:12

earthmother yeah...my DH would probably laugh at me for suggesting it but i think it is such a worthwhile thing to do and i have the space, patience and love spare for another child (sadly not been able to have another of my own what with my crappy body and all)

Original poster
EarthMotherImNot · 07/04/2010 12:42

Thanks you guys

Panda there is no feeling like this, there really isn't

Be careful how you broach the subject to your DH though, mine choked on his tea when I first raised the idea

OP posts:
PandaEis · 07/04/2010 12:23

what a fantastic thing you are doing for this little girl earthmother

you are surely a shining light in her little life and you should be very proud of what you and your DH are doing for her

this is something i have been mulling over recently myself and it is maybe something i would do in a few years when my DD is at full time school. i would have to discuss it with DH first but i think it would be something i would really feel great about doing

ChickensHaveSinisterMotives · 07/04/2010 11:47

EMIN, thank God for people like you. You're doing such an amazing thing. Really hope that baby continues to thrive and goes on to have a happy, healthy loved life.

Eglu · 07/04/2010 11:35

I have just come across this thread for the first time.

EMIN what you are doing is amazing. I'm so pleased to see how well the lo is doing in your care, and now no longer drug dependant.

ToastieLover · 07/04/2010 11:15

Mrs Rigby - my naturally liberal views make me want to disagree with you re sterilising/forcing contraception upon drug dependent women. It seems like such a gross breach of human rights.

However, I cannot think of a single better alternative and that makes me feel incredibly frustrated and sad. It is down to SS and people like EMIN to pick up the pieces for the babies whose own rights have not been prioritised by their mothers.

Like I say, EMIN, I think you do a wonderful job and I am very grateful you do it.

Original poster
EarthMotherImNot · 07/04/2010 11:04

Thank you Toastie

MrsRigby, thank you too but I'm not sure we should be shooting or making infertile anyone.

I confess that sometimes holding lo while she screamed and trembled I gave in to similar thoughts but I've never had to walk in her shoes and live the sort of life she's lived. I understand she is trying to get off the drugs so I'm hopeful this time for her.

OP posts:
MrsRigby · 07/04/2010 10:26

I've just been reading through the other pages.

I'm close to tears with what these poor babies are made to go through.

All drug dependant women should be made infertile.

And this woman has more than 1 child in care. I hope to god none of them go back to her.

OP you are amazing, I hope the little one continues to do well. I can't imagine for a second what you or it are going through.

This thread has made me so and . Thank god that baby has you OP.

MrsRigby · 07/04/2010 10:20

The baby's mother should be shot for what she's done to this poor baby. What a bitch. Thank god the baby was taken away from her.

earthmotherimnot you are an amazing person. If only there were more people like yourself in this world.

ToastieLover · 07/04/2010 10:17

You are very inspiring, EMIN. It is a wonderful thing that you do and thank god you do it.

Original poster
EarthMotherImNot · 07/04/2010 10:13

Thanks CMOT

I feel as though we've all climbed a huge mountain and, although exhausted we are exhilarated as well. It's hard to remember what sleep is, apart from the cat-nap variety but I feel on top of the world today

OP posts:
CMOTdibbler · 07/04/2010 10:04

Fabulous ! Sounds like she (and you) are doing really well