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Original poster

Omg what do I do now?

620 replies

chocolatemuffin75 · 19/02/2026 22:04

I’ve been chatting to someone online for the past week, we have arranged to meet tomorrow, he’s just informed me he’s uploaded another photo of himself, as his others were not very clear and quite far away, my god he’s awful, I know looks aren’t everything but I just can’t meet him, Why couldn’t he have posted this one in the first place! He just looks so scruffy with a stubbly beard which I hate, his other photos are obviously older. How do I tell him I don’t wish to meet now? I feel a right cow but I just can’t meet him.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
14
LikeWhoUsesTypewritersAnyway · 20/02/2026 17:19

@Dontlletmedownbruce

I'll bet if most men saw you no make up they'd run a mile too OP. Women are very good at portraying themselves as different to what they are. Fake tan, eye lashes, spanx, push up bras, hair dye. Not to mention filters. It's quite deceptive.

Wow, that was a pretty big sweeping generalisation! As well as a bit rude towards the OP!... And NO-one I know fits your description! Fake tan, spanx, push up bras, fake eylashes, hair dye etc.... Do you really know loads of women who do all this? 😆

Yes, maybe some women wear a bit of make up, and put colour on their hair, but it hardly changes most women!

.

dapsnotplimsolls · 20/02/2026 17:18

BauhausOfEliott · 20/02/2026 17:17

Isn't that the fella who owns Glastonbury?

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😂

BauhausOfEliott · 20/02/2026 17:17

chocolatemuffin75 · 20/02/2026 14:57

Something like this 😂

Isn't that the fella who owns Glastonbury?

Original poster
chocolatemuffin75 · 20/02/2026 17:10

Planesmistakenforstars · 20/02/2026 17:01

😂😂😂

It's a real shame that police sketches are done digitally these days OP, you have really missed out on your calling.

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Ah thanks! 😀

OP posts:
Planesmistakenforstars · 20/02/2026 17:01

chocolatemuffin75 · 20/02/2026 14:57

Something like this 😂

😂😂😂

It's a real shame that police sketches are done digitally these days OP, you have really missed out on your calling.

RampantIvy · 20/02/2026 16:58

WotsitsMadeIn1927 · 20/02/2026 16:35

Sometimes when they’re not your type but can still be the most beautiful person in the world and treat you well. Looks are definitely not everything

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But you still need the initial spark. A hooped earring and a beard would not even be a glimmer of a spark for me or the OP. If there is no spark at all then it is a waste of time.

WhaAMess · 20/02/2026 16:53

WotsitsMadeIn1927 · 20/02/2026 16:35

Sometimes when they’re not your type but can still be the most beautiful person in the world and treat you well. Looks are definitely not everything

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Then they would make a great friend, but not anything else, for people who want to feel attraction to their partner. It’s very normal to want to be attracted to someone you’re dating/your partner. It’s kind of weird that people are trying to make out they don’t realise this. Even if it’s not important to you, you can’t have gone through life knowing that it often is to others. Obviously relationships deepen as you get to know a person, but at the start, physical attraction is usually part of it.

ScreamingBeans · 20/02/2026 16:44

Say you don't approve of beards except on Jesus, who of course is the main man in your life. That you find beards on other men almost blasphemous in their temerity and that the reason you split up with your last boyf was because he left off shaving for 5 whole days and you were actually thinking of getting an exorcist in to deal with him.

This will only backfire if he too is a Jesus freak.

SheilaFentiman · 20/02/2026 16:41

Babyijustdontgetit · 20/02/2026 16:40

You are allowed to not fancy someone! You won’t deserve to be called shallow. Him calling them whiskers would have given me the ick immediately! I’d reply though, just say ‘sorry not for me, good luck’!

OP has already replied.

Babyijustdontgetit · 20/02/2026 16:40

You are allowed to not fancy someone! You won’t deserve to be called shallow. Him calling them whiskers would have given me the ick immediately! I’d reply though, just say ‘sorry not for me, good luck’!

Original poster
chocolatemuffin75 · 20/02/2026 16:40

WotsitsMadeIn1927 · 20/02/2026 16:35

Sometimes when they’re not your type but can still be the most beautiful person in the world and treat you well. Looks are definitely not everything

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I know but I believe you have to have some initial attraction.

OP posts:
totallyoutnumbered · 20/02/2026 16:40

Spanner in the works but my lovely DP (and gorgeous) looked absolutely not my type at all in pics. He literally did a catfish reverse. Really, really not photogenic and still isn’t bless him but damn he’s handsome. So handsome! I still don’t think you should meet him btw 🤣

Disturbia81 · 20/02/2026 16:39

WotsitsMadeIn1927 · 20/02/2026 16:35

Sometimes when they’re not your type but can still be the most beautiful person in the world and treat you well. Looks are definitely not everything

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They are definitely important.

Original poster
chocolatemuffin75 · 20/02/2026 16:39

Topsy44 · 20/02/2026 16:29

My initial thought was give him a chance.

Then I saw that he had a hoop earring.

Just NO!

Well it’s like this, but I don’t like it.

Omg what do I do now?
OP posts:
WotsitsMadeIn1927 · 20/02/2026 16:35

chocolatemuffin75 · 19/02/2026 22:38

But he’s really not my type, and we would just be wasting each other’s time, and I know I shouldn’t feel bad about telling him, but I know I will.

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Sometimes when they’re not your type but can still be the most beautiful person in the world and treat you well. Looks are definitely not everything

daisychain01 · 20/02/2026 16:34

WallyHilloughby · 20/02/2026 16:21

The thing is - people are saying just because he’s not attractive give him a chance anyway - do you realise how many times we as women lower our standards to still get treated like crap?

Exactly, why should we??!?

daisychain01 · 20/02/2026 16:33

People are nuts on here, why should @chocolatemuffin75 feel in any way obliged to meet this bloke who is a liar by omission, and she just doesn't fancy him. End of.

that isnt shallow, its having an opinion and not feeling coerced into meeting someone just because a bunch of online randoms say so. It's all too easy telling someone else to go on a date, when it isn't your time and your life.

Topsy44 · 20/02/2026 16:29

My initial thought was give him a chance.

Then I saw that he had a hoop earring.

Just NO!

WallyHilloughby · 20/02/2026 16:21

The thing is - people are saying just because he’s not attractive give him a chance anyway - do you realise how many times we as women lower our standards to still get treated like crap?

CalliopeFosterBeauchamp · 20/02/2026 16:19

Butterytoastandtea · 20/02/2026 12:02

Not really. If it had been the other way around and he said he was unemployed and broke and it turned out he was a millionaire - you're lying to yourself if you pretend you'd walk away because of the lie. Nobody would. She's a gold digger.

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I would. I don’t need a bloke to pay my way, and I don’t like liars.

Sarah24x · 20/02/2026 16:17

I’ve been catfished a fair few times and even given some a chance. Might be coincidence but all of the rotters have ended up having disgusting personalities to match. One revealed he used to get his ex to dress up as a dog and eat out of a dog bowl. 😫

My pet hate on dating apps are catfishes, using photos from years ago and men who lie about their height. And no, my profile has photos of me without makeup and full body ones so I’m not catfishing anyone.

Don’t feel bad op. My fanny would be thunderclapping shut if a man started going on about his whiskers .😒

Original poster
chocolatemuffin75 · 20/02/2026 16:05

CurvedPoint · 20/02/2026 16:04

How is that "quite far away" op? I can feel him breathing in that pic!

I’ve had to zoom in

OP posts:
CurvedPoint · 20/02/2026 16:04

How is that "quite far away" op? I can feel him breathing in that pic!

dapsnotplimsolls · 20/02/2026 16:04

Jaysus!

Joystir59 · 20/02/2026 16:03

He is a complete stranger to whom you owe absolutely nothing. Just tell him you've changed your mind and then block him everywhere.

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