Page 12 | Omg what do I do now?

chocolatemuffin75 · 2026-02-19T22:04:35+00:00

I’ve been chatting to someone online for the past week, we have arranged to meet tomorrow, he’s just informed me he’s uploaded another photo of himself, as his others were not very clear and quite far away, my god he’s awful, I know looks aren’t everything but I just can’t meet him, Why couldn’t he have posted this one in the first place! He just looks so scruffy with a stubbly beard which I hate, his other photos are obviously older. How do I tell him I don’t wish to meet now? I feel a right cow but I just can’t meet him.

Emonade · 20/02/2026 12:45

chocolatemuffin75 · 19/02/2026 22:29

Yes I shouldn’t have agreed really, but I can’t get past the hoop earring and his awful stubbly beard, if it wasn’t for these I might have met him.

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If the reason you don’t like him is cos he has stubble and earring no wonder you are single

RosePippi · 20/02/2026 12:38

People may say it’s shallow but I completly agree with you. I could never date a man who wore an earring, particularly a hoop.

It’s an instant turn off for me, I feel how I feel and that’s it! Everyone has their turn offs, it’s ok if a hoop earring is one for you. I actually don’t wear jewellery myself as I’m not a huge fan so it’s not double standards 😂.

Id cancel, don’t waste yours or his time. You will find someone who doesn’t wear jewellery and say the word “whiskers”.

usedtobeaylis · 20/02/2026 12:38

The idea that there's not a person in the world who would put integrity over money is pretty sad.

MilanoCortina2026 · 20/02/2026 12:32

someonethatyoulovetoomuch · 20/02/2026 12:28

I once chatted to a man for a week, was due to meet him and he messaged me that morning to “let me know” he was still a virgin. I called off the date NOT because he was a virgin, but because he’d made an assumption sex might come up before we’d even met. He didn’t see it that way and said I was shallow, I blocked him and moved on. Easy! If something about someone gives you the ick before you’ve even met, don’t waste the time meeting them. Plenty more men without earrings in the sea.

Or whiskers. Unless they're a walrus.

someonethatyoulovetoomuch · 20/02/2026 12:28

I once chatted to a man for a week, was due to meet him and he messaged me that morning to “let me know” he was still a virgin. I called off the date NOT because he was a virgin, but because he’d made an assumption sex might come up before we’d even met. He didn’t see it that way and said I was shallow, I blocked him and moved on. Easy! If something about someone gives you the ick before you’ve even met, don’t waste the time meeting them. Plenty more men without earrings in the sea.

Original poster

chocolatemuffin75 · 20/02/2026 12:26

Lennonjingles · 20/02/2026 12:24

Who actually says whiskers, OP I would reply and say yes the whiskers has put me off, just so he knows. Plus I don’t blame you cancelling

My thoughts exactly, part of why I’m not meeting him.

OP posts:

MilanoCortina2026 · 20/02/2026 12:25

chocolatemuffin75 · 20/02/2026 12:14

Gold digger! 😂 where has me not liking whiskers and a hoop earring equate to me being a gold digger lol?

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Some people really are weirder than weird.

Original poster

chocolatemuffin75 · 20/02/2026 12:25

Butterytoastandtea · 20/02/2026 12:02

Not really. If it had been the other way around and he said he was unemployed and broke and it turned out he was a millionaire - you're lying to yourself if you pretend you'd walk away because of the lie. Nobody would. She's a gold digger.

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Actually I work, pay my own bills, don’t claim any benefits and certainly don’t need a man for money, you have actually insulted me.

OP posts:

Lennonjingles · 20/02/2026 12:24

Who actually says whiskers, OP I would reply and say yes the whiskers has put me off, just so he knows. Plus I don’t blame you cancelling

Original poster

chocolatemuffin75 · 20/02/2026 12:20

Butterytoastandtea · 20/02/2026 12:02

Not really. If it had been the other way around and he said he was unemployed and broke and it turned out he was a millionaire - you're lying to yourself if you pretend you'd walk away because of the lie. Nobody would. She's a gold digger.

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I don’t actually care if he’s broke unemployed or a millionaire! Beard and earrings on a middle aged man don’t float my boat.

OP posts:

Original poster

chocolatemuffin75 · 20/02/2026 12:18

JustMyView13 · 20/02/2026 12:08

Do not waste your time on this man. This will no doubt be the first disappointment of many. He knows he looks nothing like his pictures, that’s why he uploaded a new one.

Thank you for your words of wisdom! Which some people clearly lack on this thread, I’ve never been called a gold digger in my life 😂

OP posts:

MonsteraDeliciosa · 20/02/2026 12:17

Araminta1003 · 20/02/2026 11:22

Has it occurred to you that recently growing a beard may be because he read somewhere that that is fashionable? And might not be his thing really either. If it’s because he is shoddy and lazy to shave that’s one thing. If it’s to be like a trend like the gym trend, it’s another thing entirely.

But that would actually make him seem less attractive: a blind follower of fashion who changes their very face because of a trend, rather than because he likes it, thinks its nice or suits him.

Makes him seem like he has no taste, personality or idea what looks good on him.

Anyway, OP very wisely isn't going to meet him.

Original poster

chocolatemuffin75 · 20/02/2026 12:14

Butterytoastandtea · 20/02/2026 12:02

Not really. If it had been the other way around and he said he was unemployed and broke and it turned out he was a millionaire - you're lying to yourself if you pretend you'd walk away because of the lie. Nobody would. She's a gold digger.

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Gold digger! 😂 where has me not liking whiskers and a hoop earring equate to me being a gold digger lol?

OP posts:

JustMyView13 · 20/02/2026 12:08

Do not waste your time on this man. This will no doubt be the first disappointment of many. He knows he looks nothing like his pictures, that’s why he uploaded a new one.

Butterytoastandtea · 20/02/2026 12:02

hazelnutvanillalatte · 20/02/2026 09:11

The fact that they lied and tried to trap the other person doesn't factor in at all..?

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Not really. If it had been the other way around and he said he was unemployed and broke and it turned out he was a millionaire - you're lying to yourself if you pretend you'd walk away because of the lie. Nobody would. She's a gold digger.

Butterflyvillage · 20/02/2026 11:57

At least he has been honest with you .... even if he left it to the last minute to send the new photo. He was worried you wouldn't recognise him!

Or maybe he had seen that advert on TV, you know the really embarrassing and toe curling one, where a woman arrives at a restaurant for a blind date, only to find her father sitting at the table.😂😂😂😂

SheilaFentiman · 20/02/2026 11:56

Once again, I am begging people to read the OP’s updates.

FunMustard · 20/02/2026 11:55

I think I would tell him that his new pic is so unlike his old ones that I've changed my mind. And then block and delete.

You don't owe him anything though, so if you don't want to do that, then just block and delete.

Terfarina · 20/02/2026 11:45

This dude is giving you the ick, there's no point wasting your time or his. How about

"terribly sorry - a change in circumstances means I am no longer able to continue our chats or meet up. Good luck in your quest'

wheelywheelynice · 20/02/2026 11:38

Do yourself a favour and join Burned Haystack Dating Method on Facebook

ChickNorris · 20/02/2026 11:33

Araminta1003 · 20/02/2026 11:26

Jacob Elordi had a beard in the first part of Wuthering Heights but then not later on. It makes a huge difference to appearance. But clearly it can be shaven off. If he is otherwise good looking apart from the beard I would go. Tell him to send you another pic pre beard.

Haha, I think that it'd be easy to tell if someone has the potential of Jacob Elordi!
I know what you're trying to say with your analogy I'm just not sure it works here.

nomas · 20/02/2026 11:29

Araminta1003 · 20/02/2026 11:22

Has it occurred to you that recently growing a beard may be because he read somewhere that that is fashionable? And might not be his thing really either. If it’s because he is shoddy and lazy to shave that’s one thing. If it’s to be like a trend like the gym trend, it’s another thing entirely.

The picture is 8 years old, he misled OP until he thought she was in the bag.

She should ditch him, not reward him with a date.

MeMeMeMeOw · 20/02/2026 11:27

Araminta1003 · 20/02/2026 11:26

Jacob Elordi had a beard in the first part of Wuthering Heights but then not later on. It makes a huge difference to appearance. But clearly it can be shaven off. If he is otherwise good looking apart from the beard I would go. Tell him to send you another pic pre beard.

And he looked like Jesus Christ after he'd been at a festival for a week. In later scenes he looked like my ex though.

Original poster

chocolatemuffin75 · 20/02/2026 11:27

Araminta1003 · 20/02/2026 11:22

Has it occurred to you that recently growing a beard may be because he read somewhere that that is fashionable? And might not be his thing really either. If it’s because he is shoddy and lazy to shave that’s one thing. If it’s to be like a trend like the gym trend, it’s another thing entirely.

Again that’s up to him, but it’s not my cup of tea, if someone doesn’t like a certain look they shouldn’t have it just because it’s fashionable, I mean these wide leg jeans seem to be really fashionable at the moment with women, but you wouldn’t catch me wearing them.

OP posts:

MeMeMeMeOw · 20/02/2026 11:27

BecauseYoureWorthIt · 20/02/2026 10:53

Oh come on, “dodged a bullet” because she isn’t attracted to him? 🙄

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God the hyperbole on here is off the scale isn't it?