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Original poster

DH says cat needs to show more gratitude

483 replies

UngratefulFeline · 06/06/2025 08:52

I’ve been away for a few days and DH managed the kids and the dog just fine.

He’s upset with our cat though and says he made a real effort to bond with him by giving him treats, protecting him when our dog had the zoomies and making sure his bedding was fluffed.

DH said the cat gave nothing back, blanked him and even swatted at DH when he tried to pet him.

DH wants to know why the cat doesn’t show any gratitude. I explained to DH very carefully that the reason the cat doesn’t show any gratitude is because it is a cat.

DH says that is illogical and there must be a real reason and “it’s a cat” doesn’t cut the mustard.

YABU- Deeper reason why cat won’t show gratitude
YANBU- it’s a cat.

OP posts:

Thread gallery

viques · 06/06/2025 09:46

Ps. I have just seen the photo, and would like to know why my cat is making itself comfortable in your house?

Shatteredallthetimelately · 06/06/2025 09:46

Cats, unlike other pets don't have owners, they have servants. You're supposed to be grateful that they've chosen to stay at your abode, and grace you with their time.
Your DH needs to realise household cats do as they will, he's lucky/fortune that to an extent said cat must like him as cat didn't also decide to up and off and go on vacation and return a day or so after you did, DH would have been left with questions to answer.
Cats aren't stupid. DH needs to know his place...🐱🐱

Moonlightdust · 06/06/2025 09:46

This is so funny. Cats will be cats. 😆🤣

Courgettezuchinni · 06/06/2025 09:45

DFr had a new Bf who had never been around cats and wasnt keen on them. He eventually moved into DFr with Dcats home and there was a standoff with Dcats who showed their displeasure at him by deliberately pooping in his trainers and shoes and weeing on his floordrobe - nowhere else inside. DFr was given an ultimatum by bf - Dcats go or Bf does. At first she stupidly chose the Bf and rehomed Dcats with another friend. Six months later she broke up with lazy Bf and Dcats have moved back home with her. No indoor mess at all. Dcats won in the end.

Bjorkdidit · 06/06/2025 09:45

ScupperedbytheSea · 06/06/2025 09:30

He should be careful what he wishes for.

We had a big floofy madam (sadly now gone) who was the lady of the house. I'm convinced she thought she was married to my DH. I was just surplus household fodder.

She absolutely doted on him, almost to the point of smothering. Drove him mad.

He once spoke sharply to her because she was being so intense, she flounced into another room and did a revenge vomit on MY work laptop.

Took me ages to clean cat vomit from between the keys with baby wipes. What a girl!

I think she's been reincarnated in our house. DP works away a lot and when he phones me, His Special Floofy Princess will storm into the room shouting and chirping when the phone rings then rubs herself over the phone. I phone home when DP is away and nothing, she won't even raise an eyelid.

But I still can't work out if the OPs DH is being serious. He's lived with a cat for however long and he doesn't understand 'it's a cat'?

greenismyfavouritecolour · 06/06/2025 09:44

This is brilliant

MoominMai · 06/06/2025 09:44

@UngratefulFeline aww I’m going to stick up for DP and say he is being unreasonable overthinking why cat acts aloof but it’s sweet he wanted to be besties lol. Also, he’s been allowed to feed the kitty treats which is an honour surely! In all seriousness though, maybe if he plays with the cat more it may help the bonding?

Grumpyoldpersonwithcats · 06/06/2025 09:42

Love your camouflaged cat 😻.
Don't think your DH understands cats 🤣.

HideousKinky · 06/06/2025 09:42

your cat doesn't bring you gifts, your cat thinks that you're too stupid to hunt. He's trying to show you what you should be doing

There is another interpretation I've heard:

When the cat brings you something dead he's saying, if you weren't so big I'd do this to you, so think on.

It's not a gift. It's a warning.

FreeRider · 06/06/2025 09:42

UngratefulFeline · 06/06/2025 09:10

He doesn’t understand this at all. He treats the cat like a dog and it doesn’t work then DH feels rejected.

Show quote history

This is why I really dislike dogs and dog owners. They expect servillity from cats and are pissed off when they don't get it. Too fucking needy by half.

viques · 06/06/2025 09:41

Tell him the cat is no doubt planning a lovely surprise for him. My money is on either a hair ball sicked up in one of his trainers or a decapitated mouse/rat/bird laid lovingly on his pillow.

Any cat can purr and wrap itself around a humans legs in a show of affection, it means nothing, but real gratitude takes planning and care in the execution of a surprise.

InjuryMyArse · 06/06/2025 09:40

Has he tried explaining how he feels to it?

NoMoreStupidGuys · 06/06/2025 09:40

I hope he shows his gratitude by bringing him a nice mouse, vole or frog. Alive of course.

RosieShacklebolt · 06/06/2025 09:40

Oh my goodness this has made me spit my tea out 😂hahahahahaha (disclaimer: we are cat owners)

ViciousCurrentBun · 06/06/2025 09:36

It’s too long to post but look up Diary of a Dog versus Diary of a Cat and give to your DH.

Then he truly understand.

FuckoffeeBeforeCoffee · 06/06/2025 09:34

Maybe he should have started with an orange cat.

Flyswats · 06/06/2025 09:33

We don't own cats, they own us.

TheGrimSqueakersFlea · 06/06/2025 09:33

Cats only like people who are allergic to them. They go out their way to be a dick.

@Caterina99 your cat doesn't bring you gifts, your cat thinks that you're too stupid to hunt. He's trying to show you what you should be doing

MatildaMovesMountains · 06/06/2025 09:32

MiracleCures · 06/06/2025 08:57

I agree with your Dh.

Any cat that doesn't send beautifully hand written thank you note after being cared for just didn't pay enough attention at finishing school.

I blame the parents.

CinnamonBuns67 · 06/06/2025 09:32

I think someone needs to let him know the cat owns him not the other way round. It's him that needs to show gratitude to bask in the feline presence 🤣 Yanbu op your husband is, my mum has the same attitude.

Kreepture · 06/06/2025 09:32

Well.. you need to explain to your DH that obviously the cat likes him, because the cat hasn't left while you've been away!

ObtuseMoose · 06/06/2025 09:31

Could you help the cat to make a thank you card? Maybe throw some litter in the envelope like confetti.

Original poster

UngratefulFeline · 06/06/2025 09:30

Fizbosshoes · 06/06/2025 09:29

I'm discombobulated that 3% of people who responded think YABU! 🤣🤣🤣

They walk among us. Like my delusional DH.