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Original poster

Hypothetical question about giraffes

231 replies

Curlygirl06 · 05/04/2025 21:37

Dh and I were having a debate about giraffes (wild evening here!).
If you had a pet giraffe and you took it out for a walk, would you put a collar and lead up the top by its head, or down the bottom of its neck by its body?
One of us thinks it should go up by its head, so that you could gently pull its head down if you were going under a low bridge, for example, or pull it to the side if you were going round a corner so it could see where its going.
One of us thinks it should be by the body as otherwise you'd have a bloody long lead (duh, it's a giraffe so obvs!) and you could guide it just as well from the bottom as up the top.
YANBU of course it should be at the top by the head.
YABU of course it should be at the bottom of its neck near the body.

OP posts:
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gillefc82 · 05/04/2025 23:10

noblegiraffe · 05/04/2025 22:55

Gah this makes perfect sense.

Which means that a giraffe centaur would look really silly because you'd totally be expecting a long neck, then you'd get a stubby short human body instead.

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Exactly - thoroughly underwhelming! Unless the human half looked like Henry Cavill, Tom Hardy or a young Josh Hartnett….then and only then, would I be more inclined to forgive the lack of “stretch” involved! 😂

TracyBeakerSoYeah · 05/04/2025 23:10

I've just asked DP the giraffe & collar question & he said "Are you on Mumsnet?" 😂

Also what on earth are these two up too on this photo (presuming it's real)

Hypothetical question about giraffes
Original poster
Curlygirl06 · 05/04/2025 23:10

Frostynoman · 05/04/2025 23:04

Bottom of the neck however if you had also one at the top like a harness then you can get it to duck under trees and bridges

Another option we never thought of. There's a lot of things that we hadn't considered, this thread is a valuable tool to ensure this matter is debated thoroughly.

OP posts:
DonnaSueWeloveyou · 05/04/2025 23:09

Hoardasauruskaren · 05/04/2025 22:53

Wish a pet giraffe was possible! Or maybe an elephant 🤔 Both, ideally!

You’d need a pretty odd shaped house though, and the giraffe would be constantly banging its head against door frames or getting a crick in its neck.

TheCountofMountingCrispBags · 05/04/2025 23:08

TyneTeas · 05/04/2025 23:00

Well now I'm trying to think of a good collective noun for a herd of flying horses.

A flapdash is the best I have managed so far

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Perfect!!

Dogaredabomb · 05/04/2025 23:07

I think an extendable wrist attachment from my giraffe to me. On his wrist and on mine, like with naughty toddlers. I love giraffes, I'm desperate to have one in my garden.

ItGhoul · 05/04/2025 23:06

Giraffes can be up to 6m tall, close to the height of a two storey house. So if its leash is attached at the top of its neck, then every time it drops its head down for a low bridge, there’s going to be about 3m of slack leash getting tangled up everywhere. So I reckon a collar at the base of the neck would be more practical.

I’ve spent a couple days working with giraffes, though, and based on that I have to say that I think they would be leading you, rather than the other way round. Lovely animals but not what I’d call biddable and they have a bull-in-china-shop approach to navigating their surroundings. And can also knock you out with just an accidental butt of the head. As I discovered.

Original poster
Curlygirl06 · 05/04/2025 23:05

noblegiraffe · 05/04/2025 22:57

God you are wrong on both counts.

Which means that whatever your answer to the original question is - that's wrong and your DH is correct.

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How very dare you! Though I'm not saying where dh stands on the neck/ bottom of neck debate, if it comes out in his favour, I'm not telling him!!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

OP posts:
Frostynoman · 05/04/2025 23:04

Bottom of the neck however if you had also one at the top like a harness then you can get it to duck under trees and bridges

AnotherHappyCamper · 05/04/2025 23:03

Down by the neck.

Surely you'd have worked out hand movements/signals etc to tell the giraffe what to do, like they do with elephants.

Yogaandchocolate · 05/04/2025 23:01

Surely the collar would fall down the neck anyway if you tried putting it at the top?

TheGaaTheSkaAndTheRa · 05/04/2025 23:01

shockthemonkey · 05/04/2025 21:45

Needs to be like a horse’s headcollar, so on the head… for control of speed and direction as well as height of head for passing under bridges.
If girafe is frisky you may need a bit, so more of a bridle arrangement with very long reins.
I love girafes too. Those sculpted heads, those lashes, those squidgy feet.

Edited

Those 15 inch long black tongues.

TyneTeas · 05/04/2025 23:00

TheCountofMountingCrispBags · 05/04/2025 22:55

Pegusus was the name of a winged horse, so you'd be looking for the collective noun for a herd of flying horses -probably much simpler, I hate trying to pluralise latin/greek!
Altho if thay are anything like land-based horses, they'd be spooking at a cloud because 'it looked at me funny'

Edited
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Well now I'm trying to think of a good collective noun for a herd of flying horses.

A flapdash is the best I have managed so far

Tbrh · 05/04/2025 22:59

ihavebecomecomfortablynumb · 05/04/2025 22:55

I’d go for a head collar, like for a horse. Definitely more control if you wanted to guide him under a low bridge, although I think he’d probably duck anyway. This is now making me wonder where a giraffe would wear a tie, if giraffes wore ties.

Definitely down below, at the bottom of the neck ... oh wait, or would it??? 😄

Tbrh · 05/04/2025 22:58

TheSassyAmberNewt · 05/04/2025 21:38

I think it should be reigns style round the body and neck tbh - like a bolting toddler - otherwise it would wriggle away!

Agree. Although realistically you'd have no chance if it decided to. And a giraffe would be smart enough not to bang into a bridge

noblegiraffe · 05/04/2025 22:57

Curlygirl06 · 05/04/2025 22:51

Still the left hand one.

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God you are wrong on both counts.

Which means that whatever your answer to the original question is - that's wrong and your DH is correct.

TheCountofMountingCrispBags · 05/04/2025 22:55

TyneTeas · 05/04/2025 22:51

I am for some reason now contemplating what unicorns and pegussses? pegusi? would look like if their base was giraffes instead of horses

Pegusus was the name of a winged horse, so you'd be looking for the collective noun for a herd of flying horses -probably much simpler, I hate trying to pluralise latin/greek!
Altho if thay are anything like land-based horses, they'd be spooking at a cloud because 'it looked at me funny'

ihavebecomecomfortablynumb · 05/04/2025 22:55

I’d go for a head collar, like for a horse. Definitely more control if you wanted to guide him under a low bridge, although I think he’d probably duck anyway. This is now making me wonder where a giraffe would wear a tie, if giraffes wore ties.

noblegiraffe · 05/04/2025 22:55

gillefc82 · 05/04/2025 22:47

Presumably neither. According to the Dungeons & Dragons Monster Manual, a centaur “has the body of a great horse topped by a humanoid torso, head, and arms.” So by that logic neither the neck nor the torso would be stretched/elongated like a giraffes (it would be proportioned like a humans) and there would be no spots/pattern on that area either, only on the body and legs.

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Gah this makes perfect sense.

Which means that a giraffe centaur would look really silly because you'd totally be expecting a long neck, then you'd get a stubby short human body instead.

Hoardasauruskaren · 05/04/2025 22:53

Wish a pet giraffe was possible! Or maybe an elephant 🤔 Both, ideally!

TyneTeas · 05/04/2025 22:51

I am for some reason now contemplating what unicorns and pegussses? pegusi? would look like if their base was giraffes instead of horses

Original poster
Curlygirl06 · 05/04/2025 22:51

noblegiraffe · 05/04/2025 22:37

I completely disagree, the one on the left looks silly, the one on the right looks snazzy.

What about this question?

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Still the left hand one.

OP posts:
TheCountofMountingCrispBags · 05/04/2025 22:50

amprev · 05/04/2025 21:49

Harness. And definitely not an extendable lead.

Thank you! The image this has conjoured will keep me giggling for days!

Original poster
Curlygirl06 · 05/04/2025 22:50

.

OP posts:
MoggiMay · 05/04/2025 22:48

Harness for sure! I’ve thought of giraffes in similar ways - how long would it take a giraffe to puke? And CPR would be quite difficult don’t you think?

thank you for the smiles!