I am an "autism expert". Ask me anything.

Yes and that is what causes the anxiety inhibition of writing in so many autistic students - not every autistic student, but those who "refuse" long answer questions /find handling ambiguity or inferring what response the examiner is looking for tricky. I don't think you could have scored 100 percent in those 1959 history questions either, but at least you would have known exactly what the examiner wanted as their response.

A goodly proportion of autistic students do have excellent memory and knowledge skills. These are the toddlers who reel off the names of every single dinosaur, and the 10 year olds who know every Pokémon, its prevolution and evolution.

The fact is, there's a mental health crisis in autistic kids in education. Part of that is social media/ online world based. Part is lockdown based. But we were already seeing the tendrils back 6 or 7 years ago and I believe part of it is that educators don't tend to understand why some autistic kids struggle with writing subjects (and call it slow processing).

Sorry, images are poor quality. Trying again.

Re education.
This is what I mean by knowledge based. These questions are from a 1959 O level history paper; the second from a modern GCSE history paper. See how the first paper is testing knowledge? "Describe, explain, what is" questions.
The modern paper has a completely different approach which places way more emphasis on using historical analysis methods, requiring inference and deduction, and questions which require the person to use their acquired knowledge and focus their answer on perspective taking, opinion etc. Way more complex in terms of higher order thinking skills.

I do know the sensory world and the communication expectations (phone, social media, emails, WhatsApp, Snapchat etc etc) are much much higher nowadays.

It's true there were no accommodations in education, but then only a tiny minority were educated beyond age 16 and the curriculum was by and large more knowledge heavy. I am not suggesting that all autistic people had it easy back then; but I do believe the modern world makes it even harder for some.

I am not sure what your third paragraph is trying to say? Are you agreeing that it's harder to be an autistic male spouse nowadays, as there are different expectations on men in general? Or feeling angry with women from prior generations in some way?

Turn down the thermostat so the water is never piping hot? Put a label on the wall saying "here and no higher" at number 7?

Sorry, didn't link the right page - should be:
https://www.spectrumgaming.net/volunteer

Answering this one having skipped a few that are similar to others or really complex and I need thinking time to answer. I will come back to those I skipped.

Does she get pip? Has she been put in the support group for Univ credit? If so she should qualify for limited capacity for work, or even limited capacity for work related activities - this latter means a higher univ credit amount each month. You can also apply for an adult social care assessment, since she is an adult unable to live independently. She might well be entitled to some PA time. My daughter has a PA 4 hours a week who takes her food shopping, helps her make important calls, that sort of thing (she lives in her own home).

She would count as NEET (not in employment, education or training) and councils are judged on their NEET population and so she should be a priority for support. I assume she doesn't have an EHCP? If not, you can apply for one, but would need her consent and signature. An ehcp would then open the door to things like 'supported internships', which are year long college and work placements. More local authorities are opening supported internships that are computer focused. They may also have a specialist college she could attend. At the very least, they should provide specialist careers advice from their specialist team.

She could also put in an application to volunteer with Spectrum Gaming. It's an all autistic charitable enterprise, it provides online gaming platforms for autistic children with a hefty side order of positive autism role models, neuroaffirmative practice etc. They train their volunteers to do things like play games with children who are lonely, sort out arguments etc. The volunteers can do as much or as little as they can manage. All employees are autistic or in a small minority of cases, very autistic-friendly.

www.spectrumgaming.net/join-our-team

Nan, this sounds awful, I am so sorry.

I am really not an expert in eating disorders and would always advise speaking with your daughter's medical team first and foremost.

What appears to distress your child? Reduce it; cut it out completely if you can, for now, while she is so poorly. Focus on things that give her respite, pleasure and calm. There will be time later to begin to move forward again in tiny steps; for now, she needs to get better as the top priority. That's more important than school, exams, uni, work, independence, everything else really.

My son's burnout was different but at his lowest point I used to get him to play Super Smash Bros on the Switch with me. I can't play at all, I am rubbish, but it was a way of trying to step into his world and assure him of a connection. He used to quite enjoy playing and was very patient at teaching me; I think it helped him a tiny bit to see he was still competent in something and could still teach me. Healthy eating went out, and I would make complan milkshakes so I knew he was getting vitamins. He was completely assured that we couldn't care less about his A levels and that if he wanted to, he could think about them when he felt better. I am sure you are doing all this. The helplessness I felt dealing with severe burnout was so awful. I so empathise with you. Wishing you and DD all the best.

@crabbyoldappletree
Second part of your question - yes, absolutely, though we are getting better. It's very typical that kids (esp girls and others who internalised their anxiety) are not referred for autism assessment until they burnout and enter EBSA.

The emphasis on inferencing - and for older youngsters, on application rather than knowledge based questioning - is very conscious. It's designed to tap into and assess what are termed "higher order" thinking skills. However these higher order skills of application and inference are often lagging in autistic learners, who understand the knowledge component and can recall and explain it perfectly. This is one source of educational stress in autism - a sort of mismatch between one's thinking style and the questions presented which means that our autistic kids often can't demonstrate their understanding. This causes cognitive dissonance in the child - they don't understand why they can't do it - and draws negative feedback from adults around them, who know they "know the information" and therefore interpret the failure to 'produce the goods' as motivation-based (lazy) or as processing speed if you are lucky (but just giving more time doesn't solve the problem). This is what triggers the intense slow burning cumulative anxiety that many kids begin to carry in school. Nobody explains that it's not that they have become stupid, it's that the curriculum is no longer in synch with their brain strengths. These types of questions trigger perfomance deficit. It's very sad.

I don't necessarily think there should never be any questions of this type, but I do think there should be more opportunities in exams for youngsters to demonstrate their knowledge in a wider range of ways, with the options for recall and descriptive questions in some longer marker questions, as well as all the application and inference stuff. Plus I think autistic kids and their teachers should have better explanations about why some questions are tricky to ND brains. This would then dispel some of the negative feedback and sad bewilderment of the middle school years for some autistic youngsters.