To have not realised I have a professional vacuuming qualification that I didn't know about?

Cleaning the kitchen, changing mop heads and mopping the floor. I've also found out I've got really rare eyes that help me see things on the floor that neither he nor the kids can see to put away. Yet when it's swept up into the 'bin pile' (or the pile of no respect, I call it) then suddenly their eyes are just like mine! So you might argue, perhaps, that they have better supervision because theirs aren't always switched on?

Professional toilet flusher with a doctorate in cleaning the undersides of the loo lod and seat.
Currently studying for a degree in cleaning the kitchen gas hob. Expecting to graduate this week.

I am the sole emptier of the kitchen compost caddy. No one else can carry out such a complex task, let alone have the sly cunning to recognise when it is (dare I even say the word)......full.

I have the superhuman ability of seeing mess and dirt and what chores need doing that's invisible to everyone else,I also have superhuman strength and take the cooker and fridge with me wherever I go as I'm always asked,what's for food? when are you doing food?

Amen to that, and replacement of toilet paper is beyond anyone's pay grade except me

I have a qualification in advanced toilet flushing and unblocking which nobody else in this household appears to have even though it's rarely me who creates the situation where these skills are needed 😨

However I forgot to add that I am a constant source of disappointment in being unable to tell someone watching the same thing on TV as I am what is about to happen next.

Oh I have numerous

1. General admin for birthdays / Christmas / events / holidays. Turns out dh didn't do the course in writing cards or buying presents or researching hotels or whatever.

1. Recycling Refuse receptacle operative. I am the only person in this house able to sepaarate rubbish and put it in the correct bin.

1. Kitchen plug cleaner. Apparently everyone else attended a course which said it was just fine to empty left over soup / cereal into the sink. I presume all the people on that course had someone on my course who were told how to clean it all out of the sink. It seems like there could be a better way of sorting this but hey Ho.

same same

I have an exhaustive knowledge of where everything goes in the house. DH will unload the dishwasher and leave a small collection of odd bits on the worktop with the excuse "I don't know where they go". We've had this kitchen for about 15 years so I would think a reasonable time to figure it out.
I am the only person in the house with the astounding ability to clean worktops without being told to and without leaving streaks and an almost supernatural ability to find things that are obviously invisible to others when right in front of them or exactly where they left them

@Xiaoxiong this is brilliant! Did you know he was going to face this situation and wanted him to learn a lesson, or was it a surprise to you too?

@666roses DH a few years ago came away on holiday to find that he had no clothes at all with him. He seemed to feel it should have been my responsibility to pack his clothes (or possibly remind him to pack his clothes), along with booking the holiday, organising all the transport, food and activities, and packing everything for the kids. He had to go to a local farm supply store to buy clothes as it was the only thing nearby, so for the rest of the holiday he looked like he was going to a young farmers convention. He has not done this since!!

I am a professional googler.

I say “you have a machine for that”.

If all else fails, I give them the side eye and send them a link.

letmegooglethat.com

I’m apparently the only person in the house who knows when it is time to change the sheets.

I am also the only person qualified to ask Google but I have retired from this job and we are now understaffed in that role while waiting for DH to figure it out.

I have failed to become properly certified in clairvoyance. I can’t answer correctly when DH asks ‘what’s this’ or ‘where should this go’ etc when I am in another room and cannot see what ‘this’ is.

My late dp had a PhD in fridge arranging & worktop tidying. My fridge looked like the shelves in Waitrose, everything in rows with labels all pointing in the same direction & my worktops were immaculate, he put everything back with military precision.

I am a drainer jenga world champion, I can stack dishes higher than Blackpool Tower 🤣

I spent a lot of hours as an undergraduate in finding things in plain sight before deciding to specialise in a Masters in the very niche subject of cleaning all the work surfaces when tidying the kitchen. Thus did I discover my true calling in cleaning the hob. I'm in the middle of my PhD now.

I’m a world leader in boxer short sorting.

2 DS, one wears only black boxers and the other wears anything except black, but apparently this is an incredibly complex sorting equation that only I am able to resolve when the washing is being sorted.

Well done me.

I see there are other level 5-ers on the thread!

👋 to small but merry band of fellow experts!

I have a level 5 qualification in removing the old loo roll tube and installing the new loo roll.

That's why this job is only ever done by me in this house - no one else has the expertise/training to do so safely.

I have this qualification too! And I went on to do a masters in putting a new fresh bin liner in, and not leaving it empty so others only notice when they have dropped something messy in there.

My exh recently apologised for ever implying I didn't do that much (I worked half time) because now he realised how much it took to run a household including a child with autism and other sen (appointments most weeks) he simply didn't realise everything I did. He is now struggling to cope with the amount of paperwork it takes to just live these days.

Haha, me too!

This also includes knowing the opening times of all the shops and businesses in the whole of the UK.

I am at least degree level in being able to make meals from a fridge and cupboards that apparently are entirely empty even after everyone else has checked thoroughly and declared 'there's nothing to eat'

I was the only person who could decipher a calendar on which I'd sneakily written in code "Monday 6:30pm swimming"
"Thursday 5pm brownies"

Apparently the Enigma machine was needed as (ex)DH proclaimed ignorance of such activities and was surprised on said days when dinner was late because the prime cook had been collecting young offspring from them.

He literally sat there and waited for us to return. Not even a pan of potatoes peeled just in case... 😳

Finder of ‘lost’ things. So much so that work sometimes text me to ask where stuff is. I usually take quite a while to reply that I’m not sure, knowing it will be in an obvious place that they haven’t actually checked properly.

XH used to complain I hid his stuff. For instance by putting joint bank statements, organised by date, in a folder labelled banking on the shelf with all the other household filing. Funnily enough he still loses his and DDs stuff all the time even now I never enter his home. At my house it is always where it belongs.