Tell me a random embarrassing thing that happened to you when you were a kid

My gran very kindly buying me a vest from Kookai (I had coveted one for so long) but then questioning the young, cool cashier on what 'Kookai' meant. She ended up getting her manager and i think they even rang head office for an answer. She wasn't being rude, was just genuinely interested but i was so embarrassed at the time. I feel bad now.

Oh God there are two incidences. I have told these many times.

The first was going to the shops with my Mum. She told me to wait here whilst she popped across the road and went i a shop. Typical kid ,she was probably only a few minutes when I started to blubber because I had forgotten which shop she was in. Eventually a policeman came up to me and asked what was wrong. He went inside a Tardis (very exciting! I was into Dr Who! Sadly, it was very disappointing and only contained a phone. He must have rung around a few shops which probably tannoyed a message for my mum to collect me!

Whilst I was waiting for her to return, a man with a child came up to me and offered me a sweetie. Knowing all strangers had poisoned sweeties to give children I said no thank you and was shocked that the policeman did not arrest him!

The other situation also has a Dr Who theme in it.

My Nan took me and my brother to Cheeseman's, a department store in Lewisham. They had some great play stuff/. Swings and stuff and a Dalek. I looked on fascinated. You could go inside it. Except I was too much of a wet hen and so was my brother. My Nan was getting cross and practically ordered me inside. So a very wet hen sat miserably inside a Dalek too frightened to pull any levers in case I exterminated anyone and went to prison!

I might take after my Nan in looks but not in bravery!!

Because i have always called trousers pants just what we have always said..

I dunno, where I am in the North West it seems quite common for people to say pants instead of trousers. I'm from the south east and have got used to it by now.

Why did you say pants though? Isn't that what they say for trousers in America? You moved from England where trousers are very much known as trousers!

God there's always one isn't there

@Igotthegoose thank you for a genuine laugh out loud image! Gives me insight into what my DD may be thinking sometimes!

That reminds me of the time I ran up to my friend at a theme park and hit her right over the head with one of those big inflatable hammers whilst shouting ‘It’s Mallets Mallet’ at the top of my voice. You’ve guessed it, it wasn’t my mate but an adult woman. To make matters worse I said ‘I’m so sorry, I thought you were Laura’ like she’d know who Laura even was

My Mother recently told me about something I said when I was little. I was playing with my older Cousins who I really looked up to and was always trying to show off in front of. My brother was being his usual annoying little brother self and was generally BUGGING me so I screamed at my parents to tell him to stop BUGGERING me

Thank you so much for starting this thread OP, I haven’t laughed so much in ages. I really needed this tonight

MNHQ this has to go in classics for the first two alone.

I was always being embarrassed by my mother so I have tried to wipe them from my memory.

We went on a camping trip in the school holidays when I was about 13. Despite it being August, it was absolutely freezing and after a night of torrential rain my parents conceded that we should probably go home. I had no dry clothes as everything was soaked through, and it was too cold and miserable to get changed in the morning so my Mum suggested that I just go home in my pyjamas. This would have been fine, except that on the way home my parents decided that actually they wanted to stop off and look at somewhere on the way home and have lunch. Despite my protests about my pyjama attire - my parents view was we were sixty miles from home so I wouldn't see anybody I knew and that I should embrace it as a bold, sartorial statement.

Except of course I did bump into someone I knew. A girl from my year on holiday with her parents who I didn't have the greatest of relationships with.

That was fun when we went back to school.

These are absolutely hilarious, especially the toothpaste lids and the penguin one.

And this : 😂😂😂
Vicar opened his door and four year old pointed to him and said very sternly “You, fuck off

in fact I dont understand how any of these are meant to be embarrassing. farting, or saying a different word instead of the correct word isn't embarrassing at all. If people laugh or mock you just ignore them and acknowledge they're very ignorant or their parents are very sad people who haven't taught them that there is nothing to be embarrassed about and you should never mock anyone else. so sad

I am laughing my head off at this 😂😂😂😂

I moved from England to scotland at about 14 to a school that was relaxed on uniform was use to the whole skirt and tie anyway 1st day at new scottish school i was only girl wearing a skirt and one teacher said oh you look smart for my reply to be dont worry i will be wearing pants tomorrow for teachers reply was dont you have pants on with your skirt for me to say dont be stupid pants and skirt looks stupid but will wear pants tomorrow for the teacher to start getting concerned i wasnt wearing pants pulled me a side and said do you have underwear on under your skirt for me to say oh yeah i have that on just not pants then the penny dropped and i was cringing 🙊🙉🙈

I dont get any of this - you'd got your arse in your hand? What do you mean? WHy did you have to go and sit on a ride? I thought you might have meant you needed the bathroom but that doesn't make sense when you say you say on a ride!

I have two I still cringe to even just thinking about. I was about 10 when both happened

1. I was at the park after school and we had been on the disk round about. ( A round about with no side and seats) It was pretty deadly at times. I came off it after being on it with the big kids and announced to my mum and her friend I nearly screamed my testicles off.....im a girl.. I meant tonsils. I was so embarrassed when I realised I ran back to play and later on my mum gave me the talk again about body's and the birds and the bees.

1. Strict Catholic school in the packed lunch hall. Total silence is a must. I felt a sneeze coming. I pinched my nose to try stop it. The force of holding in the sneeze I ended up doing the biggest fart I have ever done to date. The massive hall and the plastic chair made it echo. I was honestly mortified. And the adults not impressed.

I was about 12/13. Someone sang a filthy version of the theme tune to Fraggle Rock in the playground and on hearing it for the first time I laughed so hard I wet myself in front of the other girls.

Had the last laugh though, I got complimented on my excellent pelvic floor by the GP who had to wrestle my last IUD out, so I guess I finally mastered the art of not literally pissing myself laughing.

Oh I'm laughing so much

I remember once when I was about 14/15 we went swimming as a family, I dived in and swam across to them in the shallow end, stood and proudly showed my stepdad my right tit which has decided to escape the ridiculous costume I was wearing. I'm still mortified 30 years later

I remember being on a coach going on a school trip, I was about 14 and had a green day CD in my little portable CD player. I was listening to it on the coach and didn't realise I was singing out loud. By the time I realised literally everyone was looking at me, including the teacher, and when I stopped they all laughed. Very embarrassing!

On a school trip being so engrossed chatting to my friend that I walked full pelt into a lamp post and snapped my glasses in half. Was about 9 and laughed but was embarrassed.

Aged 14 the ice cream van came round, the young lad serving was not bad looking and I wanted to make an impression. Flared jeans were fashionable at the time and after buying 2 ice creams decided that rather that walking through the gate it would look cooler if I just hopped over my fence…except my jeans got hung up on a nail my momentum was lost and I ended up hung upside down trapped on the fence. The ice cream van used to literally stop right outside my house, there was always a line of people queuing including people from school and so everyone saw me just hanging there! They laughed, no one helped and I was utterly mortified!!! Never went out to get ice cream from the van ever again!

Wax strip disaster. Also aged 14 became aware of my top lip hair and mum had advised me to use that cream bleach to lighten them which worked ok. Mum was away and I discovered her waxing strips and thought how much better it would be to wax it off and be hair free instead. Completely neglected to read that leg waxing strips should not be used on the face, or that you were supposed to gently warm the strips between your hands first. I ended up removing the hair along with several layers of skin! Instead of hairy lip I had a bloody awful scab that took bloody ages to heal and was far more embarrassing than the hair ever was. Never waxed my lip again! My mum had a right laugh at that one!

🤣🤣🤣 these are brilliant!

I was about 12 and we had recently moved to a different part of the country. I’d got used to so many different and new regional names for things. Think calling a wasp a “Jasper” and what was a barmcake was a “bread roll”.
So we go back to visit my grandparents for a family birthday. Everyone was there, aunts, uncles, cousins at the table having a meal. My Dad made a joke at my expense, only something minor, and to embarrass him back and show off my new vocabulary to my cousins, I loudly called him a “fookin twat” 😳😱🤣
stunned silence….. he leapt up, marched me out the room and I was in so much trouble.
I thought “twat” was the local version of “twit” (as was a common word in our house) and “fookin” meant like “silly” or something. Oh the shame! 🤣

These are hilarious!! I have a few. Mostly happened when I was around 10 or 11.

1. Listening to a record on my uncles new record player with some headphones on for the first time ever. The family were gradually bringing the Sunday tea out while I sat on the sofa farting out loud, completely forgetting that headphones meant only I had the safety of loud background noise.
2. Cousin and her four year old daughter came round to stay. Daughter came with me up the village to pick up the parish magazine. Vicar opened his door and four year old pointed to him and said very sternly “You, fuck off”.
3. Another uncle sat in our garden on a hot summer day, applying some sun cream. I advised him to rub it really well into his ‘foreskin’ because that is the part that needs to soak it up most.
4. It is Christmas Eve, the house is all decorated, fire lit and it’s cosy and ambient. Relatives all arrived, drinking, getting merry. I’m in the corner bored and not being noticed. I decided it would be a good experiment to melt one of those long Parker ink cartridges on the lamp bulb next to me in the corner. As I’m leaning over it, watching the plastic cartridge melt and the blue ink sizzle, suddenly the bulb explodes and the lamp shade, the wall and my face suddenly turn a speckled kind of bluey-black colour.

When I was about 4 I had a book from the library called Baby George that, for some reason, I really loved. I already hated dresses and refused to wear them but for about 6 weeks I also refused to answer to any name other than George. My Mum had to explain me to a local shopkeeper who offered me a lollipop using my own name, as I flatly ignored him until he addressed me as George.

I also brought the school dinner hall to a standstill when I referred to my Dairylea cheese sandwiches by the name we (innocently) called it at home. Our neighbours' cat loved the stuff and it had become known as pussy cheese in our house. Yeah. Pussy cheese. I was 14. The shame still burns.