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Original poster

Can I make ice cream from shrews?

287 replies

Bwix · 08/08/2022 18:39

The cats need a treat on a day like this. My boy cat looks very hot and bothered. Girl cat has brought us 4 shrews already and I found a mouse corpse behind the bin, which smells relatively fresh.

Do you think the cats would like it if I froze them, perhaps mixed with a bit of cream? I know they can't taste sugar, so I was thinking of boiling cream and leaving the shrews to infuse at that stage, then making a sugar-free traditional custard (albeit shrew flavoured) and putting that in the ice cream maker.

The shrews are already dead so I'm assuming IANBU.

OP posts:
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5
Pixiedust1234 · 08/08/2022 22:43

This thread needs to be moved to Relationships. You are in an unhealthy relationship with narcissists and need specialist advice. Please seek therapy.

so says the woman who handfed her poorly fluffy baby freshly cooked white fish Blush

Chasingrainbows16 · 08/08/2022 22:40

Anyone else just sad about the amount of wildlife killed by cats? 😢

www.independent.co.uk/independentpremium/uk-news/pet-cats-uk-animals-killing-b2091199.html

Probably the wrong thread for me #notacatfan

HaveYouAnyDreamYoudLikeToSell · 08/08/2022 22:40

I wondered where this would go when I saw the thread title. Did not expect this Hmm

LizzieSiddal · 08/08/2022 22:39

wix · Today 21:36
Sorry to have disappeared: was experimenting in the kitchen

OP please don’t do this, we’re worried about you’ll come up with next 😂

This does remind me that we had some shrews who kept coming into the house. They were actually cute little things but had to go. We got humane traps and kept catching them but it went on for weeks, we thought there just have been so many of them. We then found out that you have to take them about a mile away from the house or they’ll find their way back! So we had to take the shrew in the car and drive a mile away to let it out. Wish we’d had a cat! 🤣

Original poster
Bwix · 08/08/2022 22:38

FreezyFreezy · 08/08/2022 22:09

lol I was thinking you were asking if you could make ice-cream out of shrews' milk and then had the idea of you trying to actually milk them like some weird milk maid.

I guess shrews are mammals so they do lactate... I think it'd take a whole drove* of shrews to get enough milk to make ice cream.

*yes, I did look up the collective noun for shrews.

OP posts:
ScreechingEchoChamber · 08/08/2022 22:29
7catsisnotenough · 08/08/2022 22:28

I'd go with lactose free milk and add some (human friendly!) mince of some description 👍🏼Freeze and serve...I'm definitely going to try this when I get home to my cat masters 🤣

Scepticalwotsits · 08/08/2022 22:27

Bwix · 08/08/2022 18:39

The cats need a treat on a day like this. My boy cat looks very hot and bothered. Girl cat has brought us 4 shrews already and I found a mouse corpse behind the bin, which smells relatively fresh.

Do you think the cats would like it if I froze them, perhaps mixed with a bit of cream? I know they can't taste sugar, so I was thinking of boiling cream and leaving the shrews to infuse at that stage, then making a sugar-free traditional custard (albeit shrew flavoured) and putting that in the ice cream maker.

The shrews are already dead so I'm assuming IANBU.

Slow cook the shrews for about 8 hours to reduce them down, sieve out the bones, put in blender until smooth the pour into ice cubes or lolly molds

WrongWayApricot · 08/08/2022 22:27

Dunno why you're bothered about them savouring the flavour. My cat tries to swallow everything whole. Seen him deep throat a cat stick thing like a snake once.

Enough Internet for me 👏

Mumsnut · 08/08/2022 22:19

Is it a full moon?

EmpressaurusWitchDoesntBurn · 08/08/2022 22:18

Studyafter40 · 08/08/2022 22:16

I have 4 frozen rats in my freezer that are labelled as 'large weaners' <snigger>

Snakes are even fussier than cats when it comes to optimum rodent temperature. I have to thaw the rat out in a sandwich bag placed in warm water. Then dunk its head in boiling water for a few seconds before serving. If this isn't good enough, then I have to insert a needle up the rats nose far enough to release brain fluid. Pets are disgusting.

Blimey. I bet wild snakes can’t afford to be that fussy.

WheelofLife · 08/08/2022 22:17

Candleabra · 08/08/2022 19:02

This is the most bizarre thread!
I was expecting a typo.

MeToo. I’m in Oz, I’ve just woken up and feel I’m in some sort of bizarre parallel universe….:)

Studyafter40 · 08/08/2022 22:16

I have 4 frozen rats in my freezer that are labelled as 'large weaners' <snigger>

Snakes are even fussier than cats when it comes to optimum rodent temperature. I have to thaw the rat out in a sandwich bag placed in warm water. Then dunk its head in boiling water for a few seconds before serving. If this isn't good enough, then I have to insert a needle up the rats nose far enough to release brain fluid. Pets are disgusting.

Lalliella · 08/08/2022 22:14

@MNHQ Classics please!

KarmaComma · 08/08/2022 22:10

Bwix · 08/08/2022 21:55

I'm thinking about how to make a mouse mousse: clearly one would need to gut the mouse first, and after that I think the most sensible prep method would be slow cooking until the meat slides off the bones, and then perhaps mix the meat with equal quantities of butter and whizz in blender.

Meanwhile whisk the egg whites until stiff peaks form. Mix the egg yolks with the cooled butter and mouse meat blend until smooth and then fold in the egg whites a third at a time, being careful not to lose too much volume. Chill in the fridge until set.

Gut it and skin it. Like a rabbit. I don't think I could do that. It would be really fiddly.

FreezyFreezy · 08/08/2022 22:09

lol I was thinking you were asking if you could make ice-cream out of shrews' milk and then had the idea of you trying to actually milk them like some weird milk maid.

Walkaround · 08/08/2022 22:08

CHIRIBAYA · 08/08/2022 18:42

Shrewd move.

😂

Lalliella · 08/08/2022 22:07

Are you rat-arsed OP?

This thread is hilarious though 😂

amusedbush · 08/08/2022 22:02

This thread is like a fever dream. I'm taking it as my cue to get off MN and go to bed 😂

Twiglets1 · 08/08/2022 22:01

I like it... mouse mousse, rat platt, frog log, bird curd and spider chowder 😋

Pr0fessionalLurker · 08/08/2022 22:00

I freeze cat milk in ice cube trays and mine like it

Pasithean · 08/08/2022 22:00

In hospital said I can go home if I don’t vomit ..........................
oh fuck.

Quackpot · 08/08/2022 21:59

I clicked assuming that was an auto correct fail.

Never again will I ever assume anything.

🤢🤮🤢🤮🤢🤮🤢🤮🤢🤮🤢🤮🤢🤮

EmpressaurusWitchDoesntBurn · 08/08/2022 21:58

slashlover · 08/08/2022 20:43

Mine won't eat the frozen Lik-e-Liks but will happily eat them from the fridge.

Mine too. His favourite meat is duck but if he thinks I’m going to pull one out of the nearest river & serve it cooked three ways with a catnip garnish, he’s got another think coming.

Mooshroo · 08/08/2022 21:57

Best cat mum ever 😅