Today my teenager was upset because.....

My exact thoughts!

Oh do give over to the Pearl clutchers who are putting a downer on the thread & seem to have selective memories over the 60s & 70s🙄

I was a kid in the 60s & a teen in the 70s & you'd just as likely get a clip round the ear from a teacher or local policeman as you would your parents. Well behaved kids didn't often get a slap of course, bar the odd bad tempered & short sighted teacher who always hit tge wrong kid with tge blackboard rubber, but the fear of it was still there.

Plus being a teen was a hell of a lot simpler back then than it is today. Our teens are stressed to hell, especially this last few years, plus their brains are rewiring, hormones agogo & they lash out where they feel safe because they are struggling.

We are not weak parents, we are caring parents who are strong enough to see what's behind the strops 🙄

_Ilovemarmiteandwine
Years ago one Christmas I bought my then DP (now DH!) a mini break for the two of us. The two DCs (then aged 12 and 13) called me “selfish and horrible” for not including them in the arrangements. Their actions reduced me to tears and for me the day was ruined. DP told them he was going to come up with a suitable punishment and they’d have to wait until NEXT Christmas to find out what it was.
The following Christmas morning he sat me at a dining table opposite the back doors, handed the kids hi-vis waterproofs and told them they were going to wash and valet my car to my exact satisfaction while I ate smoked salmon and drank prosecco.
The neighbours came out to watch…the sight of these two grumpy teens washing a car on Xmas morning was quite a sight. Of course they had to do several bits of it again before the car met my exacting standards of inspection.
They are now lovely human beings and have never forgotten that punishment!!!

this is child abuse

Thank you @BlueMongoose we have the double whammy of her being autistic AND a teenage girl. It’s not pretty at home at the moment. She just finds him deeply irritating, he can’t say or do the right thing. It got so bad a while back she refused to talk to him at all, asking me to intervene . I don’t do that, I told her if she wants to speak to Dad, she needs to do it.

MrsFezziwig what an utterly crass statement. DBro, Dsis and I would never have dreamed of speaking to our parents like many of the kids on this thread, or behaving in the hideous way so many kids seem to. Our parents would no more have violently assaulted us than flown to the moon. Neither did the parents of our friends.

Tbh I'm not sure how they managed to raise decent respectful, considerate offspring, but they did, without resorting to punishment or violent abuse . Perhaps it was because there was an expectation that we would be decent, respectful, considerate. There was no expectation that bad behaviour would be excused by being blamed on 'teenage hormones' or that's just how teenagers are. This thread is depressing tbh, normalising rude, selfish and frankly appalling behaviour.

I am inconsiderate because I pointed out that it wasn't great form to ask us to drive/collect 4 teens to/from a Halloween party out in the sticks and then have 3 of the 4 back for a sleepover commencing about 10/11pm this half term.

I salute notacooldad!

I had the cheek have a cocktail with my lunch as it's my birthday which forced him to walk all the ten minute way home from school

^if you stop bloody shouting at me I might do what you asked!! storms off you always shout at me! slams door. because you shouted I'm not going to do it now!!*

Well the 15 f#cking times I asked you calmly and nicely did bugger all so now I'm bloody yelling and you get the hump and have a tantrum because you ignored all the polite asks in the first place and now it's my fault you aren't doing it!?

That's pretty much daily in my house. As is the argument about getting in the damn shower! Have a shower - no. HAVE A SHOWER! NO! For God's I'm not taking you anywhere unless you wash! God you are so unfair! Storms off gets in shower, still in there after 30 mins, gets out dripping wet and still stinks - apparently didn't have time to actually use shower gel or shampoo in the 30 mins of water gushing over them... meltdown ensues and more strops.

Teenagers are basically giant soap dodging toddlers

My 15 year old son says I don't eat properly ( make to much noise ) it's got to the point when we go to the movies I get dirty looks & told to be quiet if I get nachos .. Iv given up buying them now as I can't enjoy them 😡

Today my teenager was upset because she said she hates absolutely everyone in her family and has no emotional connection with any of us! On top of that ‘the world is just a revolving rock and nothing effing matters’ …

The relentless negativity is what gets me 🙈

DH just found big chunks of banana stuck together with Nutella stuck to tge bottom of the dishwasher thank feck he shuffled things around & spotted it Obviously DD as she's the only one eating Nutella & Banana

She's now in a strop because I asked her about it. Apparently it's my fault because I told her to put her plates in the dishwasher

No kids! but wow alien sporn how do you all keep your cool.

Can I play despite my little —fucker— angel being 8? She’s livid with me because I just tested positive for covid this afternoon and our planned holiday abroad is no more.

Horrible way to speak about your child tbh. She's 8. She doesn't have the emotional maturity to appreciate that these things happen and she's allowed to be upset. You're supposed to be the adult here. And yeah ruining xmas for the teens 2 years in a row because they were disappointed not to go on the mini break is bloody awful. Are children not allowed emotions?

My preteen went nuts this morning because she couldn’t find her school skirts - I told her I’d washed them but were bit damp out of the dryer so I’d hung out on radiator. Cue meltdown about why I was so rubbish at doing the laundry (which should be done on weekend and folded away properly). It was a weird combo of irrational/unreasonable teen behaviour (because I had in fact done her laundry) and realising that she’s just got higher domestic standards than me!

Years ago one Christmas I bought my then DP (now DH!) a mini break for the two of us. The two DCs (then aged 12 and 13) called me “selfish and horrible” for not including them in the arrangements. Their actions reduced me to tears and for me the day was ruined. DP told them he was going to come up with a suitable punishment and they’d have to wait until NEXT Christmas to find out what it was.
The following Christmas morning he sat me at a dining table opposite the back doors, handed the kids hi-vis waterproofs and told them they were going to wash and valet my car to my exact satisfaction while I ate smoked salmon and drank prosecco.
The neighbours came out to watch…the sight of these two grumpy teens washing a car on Xmas morning was quite a sight. Of course they had to do several bits of it again before the car met my exacting standards of inspection
They are now lovely human beings and have never forgotten that punishment!!!

Absolutely nasty.

@FancyAnOlive

Your 13 yo is vaping?

@cricketmum84 glad I'm not alone. Nothing wrong with 2 kids feeling disappointed they were left out of a mini break gifted on Xmas day - then to punish a year later and the kids having to clean the car on the following Xmas. Nothing like screwing up the kids Xmas 2 years in a row for your own gain. It's selfish adult behaviour like this that has made me hate Xmas.

@Bogofftosomewherehot yes this one really doesn't sit right with me either.

He left them to stew for an entire year before exacting his punishment?

Something not quite right there.