What is your post-apocalyptic occupation?

But then I am quite a closet prepper.

I have a paper file in a water tight lock box with instructions for lots of things

Should say scutching not scorching!

For complex reasons I know/have done the basics of:

• making flint tools
• skinning & butchering live stock
• teasing, carding & spinning to make woollen yarn
• making and using a basic warp weighted loom
• tanning & scraping hides to make leather
• making & firing basic ugly pottery vessels

I can knit, sew and bake.

I'd be pretty brave about having a go at retting, scorching and hackling to make linen fibre for weaving.

I'd also have a go at making a shelter that wouldnt be pretty or spacious but would be structurally ok and keep us warm and dry. I can make fire without matches etc.

I grow fruit & veg but my yields are quite shit so we'd need to trade for food.

My biggest problems would be speed, I'd produce like 1 jumper every 6 months

I can see and have a vintage non electric sewing machine and a huge fabric stash. I can also crochet. I love to cook and bake a beautiful cinnamon roll and fruit loaf. I love cultivating mushrooms and it's really super simple and a great way to grow your own food. Once you've got one mushroom you can turn it into an endless supply. As an extension of that I'm learning all about Permaculture and making pickles and preserves to use up extra fruit and veg for winter use. I am also animal crazy and have kept and bred just about every exotic species of pet from royal pythons, to tortoises to hedgehogs. I'm a great shot too, used to hunt as a kid on family land and we shined and ate everything were shot.

As much as I like to think I'm a very modern well educated woman, in reality I do long for a good zombie apocalypse. I really think it would be my time to shine.

Tbh we're already looking in better shape than society under the Tories. Shall we just do this? There's a patch of waste ground near me - there are some horses on it, but that's going to be a bonus if anything.

I can cook, bake, knit, grow veg, chickens and pigs, I'm good with guns, I can hunt and butcher, build shelters, conserve meats, make sausages and puddings, pickle anything, forage, preserve fruits, veg, mushrooms...I'd be fine

I can climb trees so should anyone be able to spot something edible in one I can pick chestnuts and apples.

I can cook but I think apples, chestnuts and blackberries being staples might prove too much for my skills.

Also have an excellent memory and altitude for rhyme so maybe fireside storyteller. I can't sing though so would need a partner.

I'm good at planning and making things happen so I could maybe organise a team of crack shooters...?

Some sort of doctor/archer hybrid.
I want a sword. Like michonne because she is cooool

@DrSbaitso Harry Potter isn't a dystopia! They still have all the infrastructure of the modern world. And also magic.

I could... ah, teach people to sing to keep their spirits up. But TBH I'd probably be dead pretty quickly in the apocalypse because I'm a total wimp.

I'm very good at camping! So I can cook and build fires
Knit and sew

Trained herbalist so that might help

I can make soap...badly

We need alcohol and cigarettes. When societies break down, alcohol and cigarettes are the best trade goods to have on hand. And guns.

I'm pretty decent at smoking meat and bbq cooking. I can also make a very decent calzone if the pp with the mozzarella would like to collaborate. There is definitely a place for good quality Italian bread products in the apocalypse.

I'm a test analyst so I could just find fault with lots of things?! 🤷🏼‍♀️

I have zero practical skills.

So obviously I will be running things.

I might actually be okay at this.

I can cook anything on a camp fire, grew up with herbalism & foraging & often make potions & lotions that work as well, if not better than medication, I feel storms coming better than the Met, so could be a healer & wise woman. I can also make things, be it sewing, weaving or pottery & I'm generally quite inventive & good at problem solving & working out how to build things. I can fish & gut fish, I'm a crack shot, but that's probably not so useful as I doubt I could kill an animal I would never eat, but who knows in a new world

Post-apocalyptic Judge Dredd.

You have behaved in a way that is not conducive to the ethos of our new world?
You have been judged, bye

@PersonaNonGarter ds would love to be a blacksmith so I put him forward for the role

So far the village/castle is looking pretty good.

Those antibiotics and headscarves will command a tidy barter in metals.

We will need a blacksmith though. If there are no takers from the immediate community, could one of the stud-selectors also see if there is some suitable muscle for for the Smithy?

I would be dead. As an extremely short sighted glasses wearer, I have never seen myself represented in any of the many modern dystopian films/books I love so clearly I will not be able to outrun or outfight whatever it is that causes the collapse. The only myopic character I can think of is Piggy in Lord of the Flies and that didn't work out well for him

I'd be the village baker, although I might specialise in scones and leave the bread to someone else.

I did years of Tudor re-enactments so baking in old brick ovens or on open fires is my skill set. I'd be up and running in no time.

I'll trade you for some goats milk @PenguinWings