Something unexpected that made you go "wtf??"

This is not so much a wtf as a "you're an idiot" and related to the suspected identical twins.

I spent a long time thinking that identical twins, Freddie and Andrew Flintoff played for the England cricket team.

I was in the town in Tenby once, and there was a pigeon on the road. A van came around the bend and ran it over, the pigeon popped. It sounded like someone popping a massive plastic bag or something. Poor thing!

A middle aged woman was gardening on one of the allotments next to ours. She suddenly bent her legs outwards, pulled up her skirt to knee level and just pissed on the ground. It was a very long wee and noisy too, but she stood there pissing for about 20 seconds, and made no attempt to hide it. Bloody weird.

Ormally Springwatch the other night was explaining that swifts prefer white feathers to line their nests...

What I’m getting at is that the driver of the van was responsible for the blast!

A friend's son was playing for a country dance evening and I went along to support him. It turned out to be a very small affair with 12 dancers in all, of which 7 were men, all much older than me.

We'd all held hands in a circle for the next dance when the guy to my left turns to me and says "I'm sorry my hand is wet, I just spat in it!" Disgusting! Problem was, if I'd gone to wash my hand there and then everyone would have waited for me to return. I ran as soon as I could and avoided him for the rest of the evening!

I was driving on the motorway behind a van when a mini type car joined the carriageway from the slip road. The van accidentally pulled into the inside lane, forcing the mini onto the hard shoulder which was on a high bridge. It was really scary so I decided to take note of the vans reg. number and by luck the number was easy to remember as it was made up of my initials, my sons age and was also the same year as my car.
The following day there was a bomb blast in the city centre just a few miles from where I lived and on the front page of the local newspaper was a photo of the van that was on the motorway the previous day!
It was totally destroyed except for the registration number which was still intact!
I contacted the police but they said I was mistaken and that the van was bought from an area that was a hundred miles from where the motorway was. I also told them the reg of the mini on the motorway so they could check my story,but again they said I was mistaken!
To this day I know what I saw and stand by it.

@Thisgroupneverceasestoamazeme

🤣
talking about funerals youand reminded me of me making riends go wtf

talking about how many kids we might like I said I like the idea of 4.
One of them asked me why and I had this image of the Queen Mother's funeral so I replied: "because I'll need 4 pallbearers to carry my coffin"
😳

Impulse control is not easy for me🤣

I’ve posted about before at the time we were all WTAF but now I’m older I just think it’s so incredibly heartbreaking...
In Skegness on a night out and we see a heavily pregnant girl about same as we were at the time around 18.
She was being loud and lairy obviously drinking. She dancing around and pretty drunk and this was early doors around 7pm. We were a bit 🤔 but went on with our night.
By midnight we ended up in a nightclub with sweaty wall and sticky carpets all kind of grim.
There was a bit of gathering in the middle of the dance floor we went over to have a look and there was the pregnant girl pole dancing. Then she stops grabs the nearest bloke tries to snog him after he declines she starts taking kit off.
At this point bouncer should kick her out.
Now thinking about her and how vulnerable and messed up she was I wish I would have reached out to her. Hope she was ok and the baby was ok.

My great nan was in a care home. She was 98 and I had gone in to see her, as I was leaving I said to I'll see you tomorrow nana” “Don’t bother love, my mother is coming tonight, I won’t be here tomorrow, she came yesterday but I had to tell her to go away because you were coming in to see me today”. I just thought she had dreamed it.... she died that night.

FindYourPorpoise "Last summer I saw a man sitting on a park bench feeding a heron prawns with chopsticks."

I guess he was just being careful, Find, that's a long beak!!

Years ago, worked in Merton. The head of the cleaning team was a troubled soul and if I was there if an evening would tell me about her family.

She had fallen out with her daughter, said she’d told her daughter that she wished she’d died when she caught meningitis aged two. I was gobsmacked, with a mother like that, who needs enemies? I don’t recall if their relationship was bad through the daughter’s childhood or if she just came out with this because they’d fallen out.

PuddyMuddles4 Omigod, you poor thing, I feel for you

A year or so ago I was talking to a patient at work (in the North East of England) and we discovered we had lived on the same street in London at the same time in the mid 90s!!

I resigned from a job recently and sighted my wages being incorrect continuously as one of the reasons and I was fed up of chasing money I was owed. Response from HR accepting my resignation was to tell me to ensure my manger sent the correct information so my last pay is correct. My response back was it has never been in my job description to do this and it’s not my responsibility to chase my manager to ensure they are doing their job properly. Who on earth has to stand over their manager to make sure they are putting your hours in correctly?

Similar thing with my torty cat, she would only eat Dreamies until we got wise to her addiction. Being a gentle soul she didn’t bite, just sat by her bowl looking forlorn.

Last summer I saw a man sitting on a park bench feeding a heron prawns with chopsticks.

[quote Manzana]@FanFckingTastic, that's funny about your cat, a friends dog used to do the same to their raspberries, friend described it as a very delicate plucking with its doggy lips, and only the ripe ones[/quote]
One of our dogs loved picking and eating blackberries, bless her.

Believe me, we heard just about everything imaginable in A&E, including the most unlikely explanations!

This has literally just happened during the bedtime routine. With no prior instances or anything I can think of that would have inspired it, my DD6 has walked straight past her bed and spit on the carpet in the corner of her room! Twice! The first time I was so WTF I couldn’t say a word.. I went absolutely batshit the second time 😄

@CallMeCleo just googled the ‘weakest link’ murderer and he killed his wife.

If it’s the same guy he def looks like a murderer to be fair.

At my hen do, my maid of honour told me she was gutted I met my husband before she did.

We no longer speak.

I had a bit of a crush on a colleague. We had lots of long chats over the five years we worked together and as we got to know each other I was most drawn to his fantastic sense of humour. I also loved how laid back he was; nothing ever got him riled or upset. He laughed everything off and I used to wish I were more like him. Things did not go further as I was already dating another colleague and in any case he didn't seem interested in me other than as a friend.

About a year after I resigned I was absolutely gobsmacked to see his face in the paper. He'd started a relationship with another woman at work and had killed her in a jealous rage. He was known as the "Weakest Link" murderer.