What’s the most mortifying situation you’ve ever found yourself in?

bouncydog nice one !

I have so many. So many. Goes with the territory when you’re clumsy and awkward.

Disembarking from a boat, I slipped and fell on the pontoon and literally faceplanted into a man’s crotch. He was kind about it. I was mortified.

Going to the bar in a crowded pub, I tripped over my own feet and started to fall forwards. I put out my hands instinctively and bounced off the very generous breasts of the woman standing in front of me. She wasn’t as kind about it 😬

I was at an event in a large hall and the cleaners had clearly just polished the floor. I tripped over the feet of a notice board, hit the ground, slid for a while, finally coming to rest at the feet of a well dressed gentleman who peered down at me with a confused expression. Unfortunately I found this so funny that I couldn’t stand up, so I remained sitting at his feet crying with laughter until I pissed myself.

Rather drunk at a rugby game (in my 50s). Asked my friend from school if it was true that men went commando under their kilts. When he lifted his kilt he revealed something resembling a turkeys neck, I understood it was. Still scared.

Yours is best Findmeonetsy!
suction
I'd love to see the dentist's expression - did he say smth like 'sorry I didn't mean you should suck'?

I really hope more people add to this thread I had some teeth removed as a teen and dreamt I was real aggressive to the staff, I feel like I actually woke up in the car home. My sister said she had never been so embarrassed by my behaviour that I had been swearing and kicking out. No idea why that was my defence mechanism to waking up. Suspect they let me go early to get rid of me but I really was not conscious enough for release. I woke up in the car fully out a dark dreamy daze.

Me too...dying here {it's been a stressful few days, so thanks for laugh!

I was vomiting every few minutes due to quite a bad allergic reaction. I'd only moved in with my boyfriend a few months previously. He kindly came into the bathroom with a glass of water and helped tie my hair back. Mortifyingly every time I vomited I also let out a really loud fart.

It didn't scare him off though as that boyfriend is now my husband!

I was very mortified but can laugh about it now.

His third wife said he always asks ''Are you about to have a period.''

Squeamish man.

I went to Sweden for a week. Visited friend’s house and was trying to show off my Swedish I’d picked up all of six words At breakfast I tried to ask for cheese and her Mum was looking horrified. Realised I’d been asking for beer and remembered the proper word. The Mum looked so relieved not to have an alcoholic visiting her nice daughter.

About a year ago I took DD to the cinema. Afterwards we went to the supermarket and there was a guy in the aisle literally just staring at my breasts. I said, “excuse me!” and he looked really embarrassed and said, “you’ve got...erm...” pointing at my breasts, then just wandered off.

I looked down and saw that I had about 30 pieces of popcorn stuck to my jumper.

I am loving these. Needs to go in classics

@HotPatootiebootie - I'm so sorry for your pain, but that really made me laugh.

Got trapped in a broken down 4-man ski lift with my knees virtually locked between those of 2 frenchmen on a glacier in a storm.
I was incontinent and had to wee.
When we were eventually slowly winched to the top station by hand we couldn't exit the cabin - because our feet were all stuck in the “yellow” ice that had by then frozen around our ski boots.

Coming out of a shop, without looking I reached behind me to close the door and grabbed the crotch of a very tall, well to do gentleman in tweed trousers and a country jacket! I didn’t stop to see what he said as I scuttled up the road at full pelt 😳😳😳😳😳

Years ago but still makes me cringe. I had missed lunch and starving when I got in so grabbed food before I remembered aerobics class. Rushed off and in the middle of big class developed wind. No way to hold it in, but thought I would ignore and no one would know it was me. It was silent but sadly killer deadly so everyone was looking about. I turn red when embarrassed and spent the next 15 minutes beetroot, trying to ignore funny looks, and the smell just lingered. I didn't go back after that

😁 Well I generally feel better about my day today. Thanks everyone! Needed a laugh!

I had taken a sexy picture, totally nude to send to my lover and hadn't closed the photo app.
My phone rang at work and I asked my male colleague to answer it for me, and when he'd finished the call the phone was left showing my picture. He very embarrassingly gave me back my phone saying he couldn't now unsee what he'd seen.
Still makes me cringe even now a few years later 😬

After the 5 yr highschool reunion party, very drunk went home with an old classmate. He lived above his parents flat, but in a separate flat. We started making out in the bedroom, but wanted to spice things up with multiple locations so switched to the office chair. Which slid through the corridor into the living room and to the other end wall where the kitchen was. Somewhere mid-living room and just below orgasm he said "Hi Mum". Mum was sitting on the couch reading a book. And yes, we finished regardless

Think I just woke the dead laughing at the image this conjured up!

I'm shaking with laughter at the posed baby. I bet the GP pissed themselves after you'd left

you had a lucky escape tulips!

i must ask my dental nurse sister if anyone has sucked the dentists finger

When I was young, I went to the movies with my Mum and sisters. Being the good little Catholic girl I was back then (not now..) I genuflected in the aisle before entering the row with our seats.

My sisters STILL bring that up when we talk about your most embarrassing moment.

I had the most mortifying experience at a good friends wedding last year.

We stayed the night and were up for breakfast the next day which was a serve and seat yourself affair. We ended up at a table with two older teens - a boy and a girl. I started making small talk with them, including how I'd watched them on TV (they were on a Britain's Got Talent type thing) and they were very good, we'd voted etc.

About half way through this monologue, I got the cold sweats as I realised they weren't who I thought they were and were just being polite. I was so mortified I just got up and said 'I've got to go to the toilet' before dashing out back to our room where I texted DH to let him know I was a knob and I'd wait for him in the carpark.

I'm still waiting for my mate to mention this, he's the type to bring it up and take the piss ALL the time! Thus far he hasn't, but I'll definitely have to name change just in case!

I had my tonsils out when I was in my 20's .. my mum stayed with me whilst they gave me the anesthetic.
Later when I was back on the ward , she told me that as I was being to put to sleep . I shouted out I love vodka .
She had already told everyone I knew and probably anyone that would listen what I said and eventually when I came round properly, I woke up to find my phone full of messages taking the mick out of me 🤪