To be annoyed that no one has ever told me I look like an actual sea monster in real life?

Surely everyone feels like this when they see themselves on camera?!

I hate my voice! I'm from Essex and sound WAY more common on film.
I have 2 chins when I smile.
My nose is massive.
Im still soo overweight after having 3rd baby a YEAR ago.
My husband still loves me to bits tho so... 🤷‍♀️

Without my slap on I officially look like a "crack head". I'm borderline albino (no offence to those with albinism) and it's been a problem for years. My parents were actually called into my school when I was 14 because they thought I was a drug addict 😂. My Mum was mortified and wanted to sue them for defamation of character. God, was I relieved when I bought my first bag of make-up. I've not worn any slap for weeks and I feel liberated, but everytime I catch sight of myself in the mirror I say "fucking hell you really do look like a "crackhead". I may cover all the mirrors with bin bags or do a Fearn Cotton and stick post it notes with "you are beautiful" "you've got this" "positive vibes' and "look at you, sexy beast" all over the place 😁

This thread is a hoot

Thank fuck I don't even have to speak to anyone in my job, much less be seen by them But I am doing exercise classes via Zoom and the combination of my resting bitch face, my encroaching age and having foolishly chosen to have a short hairstyle, not anticipating that one day a pandemic would mean my not seeing my hairdresser for three months plus, adds up to all my unsuspecting and blameless teachers having a superannuated version of Beaker from The Muppets hovering on their screen, wearing a Doc Brown Back to the Future wig.

God I truly feel for you op! I was asked if I had Zoom or something to do a video call and I recoiled in horror and said oh no I don’t do that sort of thing! I can’t even bear looking at myself in a mirror and if I catch my reflection in anything accidentally I’m absolutely shocked at how old and haggard I am and how my face is falling down! I just want to cry, I look nothing in real life like I think I look!

Loving this thread. Just discovered that I touch my face ALL THE TIME.

Not a good habit to have at the moment.

So glad I am not alone.
I’m the oldest of my team and bloody look it.
I tried doing my hair, but done hair looks like a helmet, undone hair like string. Why am I so shiny? I have dry skin so opt for ‘dewy’ tinted moisturiser, the top of my face is like a polished skull, the bottom half like a deflated balloon. I had no idea I was so expressive, think Wallace & Grommit, not Julia Roberts.
Was most disappointed to find the enhance my appearance button was already on.
Have been googling facelifts!

This has been a fabulous thread. I’ve been literally weeping.

Thankfully no zoom meetings but FaceTiming family. Where I realise I’m Shamoo’s long lost sister, who given how I look on camera I need to stay lost.

My forehead looks awful and my nose huge. And the lines at the side of my mouth resemble a long, long ski slope.

This is hilarious, its like having the old MN back, no eating crisps on benches just a good laugh

I spend an insane number of hours in full Hazmat these days. I FaceTimed my DD the other day and she winced: oh mummy, that looks awful, how many hours were you in full gear for?
Actually, my precious first and only born, not a single minute this morning, it’s just mummy’s face these days....

Haha, this is amusing me no end. I've also discovered how tiny my eyes are and how obvious my little moustache is. I look like one of the Mario Brothers.

I Skype rang my father comes the early days of covid, he's trapped abroad. You have the option to recieve the call as voice or video. When he accepted the call all i heard was "oh no, oh no, oh no!". I got scared and asked what was wrong (i had the phone to my ear). He said he'd accidentally hit video but he didn't have his teeth in!!!!!

I took my glasses off today. It didn’t help (hence looking like a thumb) but I couldn’t see how bad it really was, so I could at least hear what was being said.

@lastqueenofscotland we're twins! I'd heard that everyone has doppelgänger. You are clearly mine! Or am I yours? Hi!

I tried to join in with the morning video call meeting but even after half an hour of hair and make up I still looked absolutely shocking and rather than listening to what was being said would spend the entire meeting staring at myself at the side of the screen thinking..why does my face not match?....has my skin always been that bad it’s horrific!
I fixed the problem by taping over my webcam with electrical tape and claiming it no longer works
And I would love to think the fact I look so shocking is caused by the camera and everyone’s the same but then I remember going to get my passport photo done a couple of years ago and try as she might the photographer could not get a photograph where my mouth wasn’t drooping at one side to the point where after I dismissed the 5th photograph as horrific she gently asked me if I’d ever had a stroke! I swear until that day I considered myself relatively attractive

And who knew my face was so ... expressive? It turns out I’m pulling weird faces all day - like the totally krazee face Caitlin Moran pulls in all her byline photos. Even when I’m talking about something quite serious or boring. Just stop it you weird fake fun loon.

Thank you all, I've had such a down day today and this thread has cheered me up so much.

I actually think I look like a truck driver in drag. All big arms, huge jaw and this unlikely hairstyle, that looks like a wig from a shop called something like EttieBetty that sells supplies to men who want to 'dress female' at weekends.

I look like my Grandma on FaceTime. She's 97 😩

My hair is frizzy, my roots are awful, my skin is simultaneously dry, wrinkly and spotty and I move my mouth strangely when I talk

People don't need to worry about the economy, I'm singlehandedly going to prop it up with the amount I'm going to have to spend on beauty treatments after lockdown

@DuesToTheDirt I have that problem too. Annoying team member was off for 2 weeks but now he's back our daily team meetings have gone from 20 mins to almost an hour. This morning I rolled my eyes so often I thought I might pull something.

I also forgot that people can still me if I mute, I was happily helping DD with her maths when I suddenly realised everyone had stopped talking.

I actually have someone else’s neck ....a 90 year olds. And even though l don’t smoke I have the lines on my mouth of someone who puffs away on 40 a day ....and what about the colour of my teeth ! 😬 l actually can’t concentrate on what anyone is saying ...so busy hating myself .

I am my dad in a dress. He's an elderly alcoholic. My missing side tooth gives me the look of an 18th century harlot, without the glamour.

I would love to know how someone else's teeth leap into my mouth when I'm on Facetime.
I had a Facetime chat with my mates the other day and they were all slightly blurry, and I saw me, and then there were my teeth in terrifyingly techno-vision looking like they were about to leap out of the screen and eat people

I’m not very tall, have chubbed up a bit on lockdown and gave my short hair a slightly ill advised corona-trim at the weekend. I now look just like Kim Jong-un

^

Sorry

I look like Ang-Ella Merkel tho

Why did no one tell me I looked like this?

After being told off for commenting to someone their twin babies were very ugly I've substantially toned down my honesty.

Have I been mislead? Would it actually be helpful if I explained to some of my friends what's wrong with them physically?

I too am looking remarkably like my mother.

Or my 3 year old.

I used to look like Sienna when she was 'courting' Jude