To be annoyed that no one has ever told me I look like an actual sea monster in real life?

All my colleagues look peculiar on video calls, so I don't think what you can see is a true reflection of what you actually look like in real life, don't worry!

I look like my Dad in a wig
You and me both

Feeling comforted I'm not the only one! My face is so asymmetrical I really hate watching videos of myself but at least I know I'm not the only one.

In Zoom meetings lighting is EVERYTHING. I have a wide nose and the shadow from my lounge light right above my head means the bottom half of my face is basically in the shadow of my nose! Side and natural lighting helps so much.

I tell everyone that my camera doesn’t work. This is because of the electrical tape stuck across it, but they don’t know that.

You lot think you've got problems! My cheeks have decided to fall down and become JOWLS for Gods sake! I'm 31!!

Used to be thin and attractive, now a 38 year old mother of four and look like Johnny Vegas onscreen. Sad times.

I look like a dream... Dream topping that's been puked onto a grey washcloth. I stupidly did the first make up free, not anymore, I have even been fake tanning to try to counteract the grey. My mum realised her roots were showing so appeared in an African headdress yesterday. We aren't African and I kept forgetting she could see my actual face laughing at it. She startled the cat and he kept pawing at the screen everytime she moved.

I have attached an accurate picture of myself on every zoom meeting
I have also developed a bit of a stammer which only appears on zoom meetings. Weird and annoying

Turns out I have a massive lazy eye and only speak out of one side of my mouth.

That's really fun to realise when you've just presented to 200 people and are watching the meeting back to pull out key questions for future updates.

I can't stand my voice. I'm amazed that anyone ever wants to hear me speak.

I FaceTimed my mother yesterday. I couldn't work out which face was mine and which was hers. She's seventy fucking five 😭

Laughing so much!! It's not only the roots, the enlarged pores , the ginormous bags under my eyes, but the VOICE.

It's so whiney, nasal and annoying. I can't believe everybody i've ever known has had to put up with it for so long!

either averting his gaze or avoiding my gaze My fingers clearly felt my brain hadn't come to a conclusions.

A few weeks ago I was among a group of people that sent messages with a photo of themselves to a couple of relations.

I had to take a selfie as I'm on my own during lockdown. Looking at the awful prissy looking woman in the 'best' selfie I could manage it comes as no surprise that no one wants to spend lockdown with me.

Been doing a lot of video calls with family since the lockdown as well. I have no idea who the hell that old woman with the horrible flat hair is, but every time we do one of the calls, there she is with her picture in the corner of the screen; I wish she's bugger off.

Loving this thread! It's cheered me up no end!

This thread has cheered me up so much! I spend a lot of time morbidly fascinated by how awful I look when I’m talking on screen. I’m so relieved I’m not alone!

I’m going to put on mascara for my meeting this afternoon. I felt strange this morning with mascara on the top half and gardening trouser on the bottom.

I'm sure the positioning of your tablet/laptop makes a difference. Make sure you are not looking down into it - stack it on some books or something. Good idea!

I was struck this morning with the divergance of spoken and visual messaging - guy at the other end was trying to cement the relationship and was talking openly and, presumably, trying to look into my face ... except he was looking at my face on his monitor and so my view of him was looking down and avoiding his gaze. And I was presumably doing the same to him. I wonder if this is part of the reason we all hate remote meetings (apart from the technical problems and the all speaking at once then all stopping to wait for each other).

The other thing I learned from lecture recording is that what I thought was a rather soft hint of a Scottish accent is actually more akin to Rab C Nesbit, or the incomprehensible aberdonian from Brave.

I always look slightly deranged as I'm looking directly at the screen but in reality this looks like I'm staring intently at something slightly off screen. Everyone things I'm a bit mad anyway. Meh

I am a university lecturer. All our lectures (in the before times when I left the house) are recorded. There is a small screen that shows the image that’s being recorded as it happens, I have to turn it off because the fat old woman on it is too distracting. We can also use a camera to film writing on paper for worked examples in class; even my hands are old and fat.

Can relate.

I look like a thumb.

Move the laptop back a bit is my only top tip. The further I am from the screen, the better I look, for some odd reason...

Either that or slather your camera in vaseline, old school Hollywood style.

I was doing a zoom meet up with friends and my DP when I realised I fancied him MORE ON SCREEN than in the flesh sat next to me. Somehow seeing the reverse image balances out his features and makes him look more attractive. Was seriously considering telling him this.

I have so far spent all of lockdown pouting. Now that I know I have no bone structure whatsoever I am adopting this look permanently to try to create a jawline and some cheekbones.

My brother's girlfriend always looks amazing.