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Original poster

Which sentence did you say today that you'd never have said a month ago?

686 replies

Bluewavescrashing · 31/03/2020 17:51

Me- 'Wash your hands, you've just touched the post!'

OP posts:
loveliesbleeding1 · 31/03/2020 20:03

“Actually,Mum 7.99 is very good value for 18 loo rolls”
I used to buy 9 for about 2 quid in Aldi.🙁

AgeLikeWine · 31/03/2020 20:03

“I’ve been furloughed.”

nex18 · 31/03/2020 20:03

Definitely... there’s too much food in the fridge, there’s no space for wine! (I normally pick up fresh stuff every couple of days)

blardyfeck · 31/03/2020 20:02

What the hell does "furloughed" mean?

Marmite27 · 31/03/2020 20:02

Leave the parcel, leave the parcel, ok great, now go wash your hands.

SnugglySnerd · 31/03/2020 20:02

Me: Can you put an old towel on the table for me to unpack the shopping onto and then we can wipe it all before then put the towel straight in the wash with my clothes.

Dh: do you think it's ok to wash onions?

BackInTime · 31/03/2020 20:02

'Don't touch the shopping until I've cleaned it with antibac'
'Do you think the police will question me for going to Tesco's when I went shopping yesterday for MIL'

MissClementine · 31/03/2020 20:01

You know if you run out of milk you can make some using porridge and water in a blender, it’s quite palatable!

Mummyshark2018 · 31/03/2020 20:00

To dc- You're wearing rubber gloves when we take the dog for a walk 😳

ivfbabymomma1 · 31/03/2020 19:59

I absolutely cannot wait to do the food shop

PennyArrowBar · 31/03/2020 19:58

There are loads of chihuahuas coming out of the woodwork.

Grin this made me do an actual LOL. Ours had been for three walks this week and every day when I've got the lead out you can see her go "oh for fucks sake, AGAIN?!" She really would rather not go.

GreenWheat · 31/03/2020 19:58

Me to DH "Look at this, they had meatballs"!

Wineandpyjamas · 31/03/2020 19:57

Walking very very carefully back from the shop and trying not to make any sudden moves as I had precious cargo. Got in the door and held the box of 6 eggs up at DH whilst shouting ‘I found eggs!’

rosea19 · 31/03/2020 19:57

Can you water down the milk in the porridge? We need to make the milk last.

What on earth do I do with a celeriac? (After veg box delivery)

NuffSaidSam · 31/03/2020 19:56

'The door! That was the door! Someone knocked! Quick! Ooh! Who is it?'

We had a delivery today and when the door knocked we all assembled at the end of the corridor to see from a distance who it was. It's the most exciting thing that's happened for at least a week.

buttcrackmcheese · 31/03/2020 19:55

Not corona related completely, but I'm going so crazy after almost 14 days in isolation that when my daughter tutted as I knocked the dog off from humping me I said "I'M SORRY I DONT WANT THE DOGS PENIS NEAR MY BUM!!!!" 😩 will 100% be repeated to grandparents at soonest opportunity GinGinGin

Lifeaback · 31/03/2020 19:55

(On the phone to my mum) ‘I’m just queuing to get into the co-op’

Toddlerteaplease · 31/03/2020 19:53

I'm out for my Boris walk.

Blingismything · 31/03/2020 19:52

I told a lady walking her poodle that 'I don't usually lurk in alleyways' as I had to press myself into the hedge in the widest part whilst she tentatively approached from the narrowest part.

Imissthebeach · 31/03/2020 19:51

watching my children fuck about on their bikes

Me: Be careful please and don’t fall off. A&E is closed. No really - it IS closed this time, I swear.

And my A&E Doctor friend saying across the road “yes.....and I can’t work from home! Although they’d like to see me try”

Both funny and surreal at the same time!

HerRoyalNotness · 31/03/2020 19:50

My neighbour

“There is a big black caterpillar on your outside window, as big as a cat”

Later when I saw her in the garden she pointed it out. Oh that’s just black duct tape we used to tape up the smashed window. 🤦🏽‍♀️

Blingismything · 31/03/2020 19:50

'You can phone me anytime I'm not going anywhere'

CaptainMarvelDanvers · 31/03/2020 19:49

You’ve been to the shop twice today?

LimeJellyforBrains · 31/03/2020 19:49

"They've got frozen peas!!"

Blingismything · 31/03/2020 19:49

There are loads of chihuahuas coming out of the woodwork.