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Which sentence did you say today that you'd never have said a month ago?

686 replies

Bluewavescrashing · 31/03/2020 17:51

Me- 'Wash your hands, you've just touched the post!'

OP posts:
tiredofbeingalone123 · 01/04/2020 17:38

Piss of coronavirus you cunt!!!

ToTheDoctors · 01/04/2020 17:37

To DH "thank god it's just a chest infection"

hen10 · 01/04/2020 17:35

Oh God, you just don't get it do you? You can't 'just stroke next-door's cat'. To animal-loving DS (16). It made me really sad to say.

ToTheWall · 01/04/2020 17:34

On the phone to my grandma
"Has Boris Wrote to you get"

Pliudev · 01/04/2020 17:34

When a man came into our village shop and walked towards me, I put my hand up like a policeman on traffic duty and said loudly 'Stand back. I'm coming through'. I could hear him laughing with the woman who works there as I left.

SachaStark · 01/04/2020 17:26

“Yes, love, my appointment for universal credit is in two weeks’ time.”

HasaDigaEebowai · 01/04/2020 17:25

"You can have the fish pie, daddy can have the leftover pasta from last night and I'll pick the mould off the last muffin"

TieYourTrampolineDownSport · 01/04/2020 17:23

“There was a fight in the chocolate biscuit aisle of Waitrose so I couldn’t get any chocolate hobnobs”

jadey0891 · 01/04/2020 16:05

Gloves and mask on

Ellmau · 01/04/2020 16:02

I really wish I could go in to the office.

heidihigh · 01/04/2020 15:13

I find myself dreading my days off because I know it will be hours on end of nothingness. Before I used to love hours on end of nothingness!

Smilethoyourheartisbreaking · 01/04/2020 15:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

EsmeShelby · 01/04/2020 14:58

I bought 2 fray bentos pies.

Ninkanink · 01/04/2020 14:57

Ah ok...Fair enough; I wouldn’t choose to actually eat an overly brown banana either!

If you’ve still got it you could possibly make a peanut butter-banana-ice cream milkshake?

I want a snack now...

FTMF30 · 01/04/2020 14:53

@Ninkanink I would love to bake but haven't been able to get ANY kind of flour on my last two shopping trips (so almost a month).

To be fair, the banana in question had almost completely black skin and turned to mush when opened. Way too sweet and not enjoyable to eat as was. Maybe soon, I'll strike it lucky and get my hands on some flour.

NotEverythingIsBlackandwhite · 01/04/2020 14:53

DH's colleague: "Are you enjoying the waitress service?" when I put down lunch and he indicated a 'T' with his fingers when I asked if he wanted tea or coffee (forgetting his colleagues in his meeting could see him).

Me: "Can they see me?" (even though I was nowhere near the camera when he was on his conference call meeting).

dkanin · 01/04/2020 14:51

I shouldn't order any clothes, bringing the parcel might put the postman in unnecessary danger

notasoutherner · 01/04/2020 14:45

Yes DH, work as late as you like. Work all night if you wish, my sweetest darling.

Otherwise known as GET OUT OF MY FUCKING WAY

Lordfrontpaw · 01/04/2020 14:41

Last time I went out to pick up loo roll I put it into a plastic bag then popped it into my shopper. I was convinced I was going to get mugged!

NotEverythingIsBlackandwhite · 01/04/2020 14:40

Phone call to my brother:
"How are you? You don't have a cough or fever do you?"

DH: "We'll have to take the car out for a run soon".

Me: "Guess how many people died today".

Me to DSis: " Did BIL get a letter from the Government?".

Me in M&S: "Can we only buy 3 bananas?"

Some of these have had me in tears of laughter, I need to go and wash the rest of my mascara off and re-apply it.

GU24Mum · 01/04/2020 13:24

Telling my 9 year old that I've arranged some Zoom conference calls for her with her friends........!

Redcrayons · 01/04/2020 13:04

me: I got loo roll
DS (15): good news, I was getting a bit worried.

I went to Aldi yesterday and i Put the shopping in the boot and threw the loo roll on the back seat. I was walking away to out the trolley away I had a genuine thought that someone might smash my window to get my supplies Grin

SnugglySnerd · 01/04/2020 12:52

Whispered to dh "can your colleagues see me hanging the washing up"?

Livingthecovidaloca · 01/04/2020 12:37

To DGM, “ I’ll look out for beans, but I can’t promise anything”

Lordfrontpaw · 01/04/2020 11:41

'You can make your own hand gel you know...'