To ask the grossest thing your pet has done?

Yesterday morning I came downstairs at 5.30 to have a precious half an hour to myself before my DS woke up. Made a cup of coffee and toast, wandered into the living room in the dark in my bare feet and trod in the biggest dog turd you've ever seen. Squished up though my toes. Had to hop to the downstairs loo to clean my foot. Then try to scrub the shit out of my BRAND NEW £350 wool rug. There's still a brown patch on it. Loveable bastard

My first cat who was a tamed feral would bring live frogs in and crunch them to death while they screamed and screamed. I couldn't bear it but if I tried to take them off him he'd savagely attack me.
In the end I'd lock him out if I saw him coming towards the cat flap with a frog
My latest cat has inflammatory bowel disorder and often has horrendous diarrhoea if she finds something to eat that isn't strictly on her diet list, usually the old lady next door leaving stale cat food out for the hedgehog.
She went missing for 12 hours, I looked everywhere and it's no good shouting because she's stone deaf.
I was just starting to put posters about the local area when I went to use the downstairs loo and there she was shut in, no idea how as the downstairs loo is tiny and you'd notice a cat in there.
She'd drunk the toilet water to stay hydrated and the entire room, half way up the walls was covered in diarrhoea, I just wanted to burn the house down and start again to be honest.
She had obviously been on the hedgehog food the day before. She had to go in the bath, it was the only way to get all the shit off her.

Ate a dead magpie and threw up a wing and the beak in my bed
Hid a big mouthful of chicken gizzards in my bed
Ate a whole 4lb roast chicken (she only weighs 9lb herself) and had to have the bones removed from her stomach
Steals snotty tissue from the bathroom bin
Would kill for toenail clippings.

My dog is gross. Licks/eats other poo when we are out walking. Has eaten the contents of my dd nappy (not just a wet nappy ) he also chewed the contents of the bathroom bin when I accidentally left the bathroom door open - while it was my time of the month (say no more )

This is so embarrassing and I'm going to NC after this

My cat ATE a used condom....DP's used condom... Yes you read that right.

The cat must've fished it out of the bin when we were out and ate it.

I came in and the cat was scraping its arse all over the floor, I looked and could see a wierd object half way out of its backside.

I stood on it, the cat ran in shock and lo and behold there was the used condom under my foot🤮

Anyway the cat got vet checked, very embarrassing! Everything OK though the cat unharmed, but I am now scarred for life

We have 2 dogs, brother and sister. The male likes to wait in the garden while his sister goes for a wee, he then drinks it. But even worse than that, we have repeatedly found her licking her brother's nether regions. It makes me want to throw up!

Cat number one took a dislike to one of our friends. Every time he can round the cat would crap in the bath by way of a dirty protest! Same cat would also chew my hair and I’d often wake up to him sitting on the bedside cabinet having a good chew. Not the worse thing to do until he would have a shit and I’d then have to run round the house as there’d be poo dangling out of him still attached to my (long) hair that he couldn’t pass without help!

Cat number 2 regularly took poo out of her litter tray (in her mouth) and hide it. She’d wait until it dried out and use it as a toy to bat around the wooden floors. I was at a work conference, sharing a room with a colleague. I couldn’t find something in my hand back so tipped the contents onto the bed and out rolled a dried up cat poo. No idea how long it been carrying that around.

We had a cat when I was a child that had a litter of 4 kittens but she kept picking them up and taking them to random places in the house. One day we came home and couldn’t find the kittens. Eventually one was found in the linen cupboard but 35 years later the other 3 have never been found. I still have a cat now, you’d think I would have learnt my lesson!

We went to a lovely stately home and I left dh sitting on the lawn with the dog (big lab) while I went inside. When I came out, the two of them had clearly fallen out with each other. What had happened was that ddog had tried to hump dh in a very determined way (and he had a hell of a grip on him and DH had a bad shoulder at the time and couldn't fight him off) and once finally prised off, ddog vomited everywhere. Dh had nothing to clean it up with as everything was in my bag, so he had to scoop it up into an empty ice cream carton to get it to the bin, retching all the time. All on the front lawn, surrounded by people relaxing in deck chairs watching him. The two of them couldn't look at each other when I came out.

Getting it on with my boyfriend at the time (now husband despite this incident) and my German Shepherd wandered into the bedroom, squatted and shat next to the bed. It didn't half ruin the mood! 😃

Re dogs who eat their own poo or that of another pet you own - I was told by someone (he bred and trained sheepdogs) that if you feed them some pineapple that gives the faeces a taste dogs dislike. Might be worth trying. (Don't know if it has to be fresh or if tinned is ok, or how much)

Oh and the same twatty male dog can open cupboards and I was newly single and living alone.. mum came to visit, Colin (the twat dog) went off upstairs randomly and came downstairs proudly parading my vibrator, I don't know how or why he felt then was the best time to do that 😩😩

Went to the
Loo, middle of the night DH took twat dog outside, got off the loo to 'oh my god noooooooo!!! Get back here!!!! No! Don't go upstairs!!!

She'd
Caught a mouse, killed it and took it upstairs into our bed!!!

Saw a string hanging out of other dogs mouth, thought it was just stuck in his beard but it kept coming and coming, like a magicians handkerchief trick, it was at least 6 foot long and clearly sat in his stomach as he kept gagging as I pulled it out 🤢

Same dog has puked on the only piece of carpet in the room many many many timeshare 🙈

Never had my own dog (and never will after this thread!)
But as an easily embarrassed teen, I would have to avoid going to my best friends house if on my period. Her dog would get over excited jump up at your crotch and try and desperately lick / eat your trousers or even tights to get to your P pad. Urgh.
He was cute the other 3.5 weeks of the month

Disgusting Dog1 ate Delightful Dog 2's freshly evacuated poo, then threw the whole perfectly formed parcel up onto my bare thigh.

My dog ate a used tampon out of the bathroom bin.
We took her for a walk at a National Trust Forest the next day and she literally took a dump outside the cafe.
The tampon got caught coming out of her butt and I had to get some loo roll and pull on the string to get it out of her arse, all in view of people trying to enjoy their coffee and cake!🤢🤮🤪

My cat came in once and threw up on the carpet, not that unusual but he appeared to have eaten an entire fat ball made with meal worms prior to coming in. It was so disgusting that I cried whilst cleaning it up

Not my pet but one I was looking after.
I was staying in a friends house with her mother and looking after her cats. Got home from shopping one day to find what looked like a ccrime scene. Friends Mum was shut in her bedroom and shouted cat's been disgusting, you'll have ro deal with it, I can't.
The cat had killed dismembered a huge iguana and left bits of it in just about every room in the house. I had to go round collecting up gory pieces of the ex iguana and try to make sure I had all the pieces so no one got a nasty shock with a leg or something I had missed.

Same cat later brought in and released a huge hissing cockroach which scuttled all over the place while I tried to chase it with a tupperware box to catch it in.

My old staffy ate a thong. I didn't know it was missing until he puked it up 3 days later.

Which also made me puke.

Audacity yes he’s fine now!! Murderous. DD was busy with him earlier. “Mummy, he LIKES it”

The night after a milestone birthday, I woke up with a horrendous hangover.

Went to the kitchen to make a cup of coffee, but the smell turned my stomach - I had to bolt out of the back door to be sick (bathroom was 2 flights up, I'd never have made it).
My dog came out and started to eat my sick while I was still vomiting

I once had a dog who came up to the living room with his own shit on his ear. And as I tried to clean it he rolled over like a ninja, smearing shit into the sofa.

Current one also sneaked In one day whilst me and DH were doing the deed, first thing I knew was when DH shouted cos he had a wet nose on his arse. Not so disgusting, but cringe.

One used to chew on underwear (especially if it had accidental blood stains from my period), or he'd fish out my sanitary towels from the bathroom bin (I always tried to keep him out the bathroom but he was sneaky).

The other eats any kind of poo she can find, and she goes right to people's crotches sniffing around as soon as she meets them. So embarrassing.