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DH's obsession or whatever. It's not normal is it.. what should I do?

510 replies

NewSchmooo · 19/08/2007 19:25

Today there was a mix up at work with my shifts and I came home from work only 45 minutes after I'd left.

I found my DH of 7 years naked on the bed surrounded by all the stainless steel kicten implements that we possess and rubbing a knife sharpener gently up and down an intimate area of his body. He was very aroused. He even had pot pourii candles burning and soft lighting.

I knew something was amiss as soon as I came in because it was so quiet and I just had this intinct but I had been putting the bin out for tomorrow so came in through the conservatory and he didn't hear. I just opened the bedroom door (we live in a bungalow) and there he was.

I know its not another woman but what do I do about this. And the softlighting and stuff; he hasn't made that much effort with me for years.

I don't know what to do. Has anyone ever heard on this? A knife sharpener for goodness sake. I feel sick. Have obviously changed my name for this.

OP posts:
Lizzer · 19/08/2007 21:49

Oh god not the Kenwood, this man has no shame

Piffle · 19/08/2007 21:49

Please do not let him near the new Lakeland Catalogue, that Cuisinart griddle grill is so aesthetically scrummy, it nearly had my ejaculating...
And let me (and my every whining DP) tell you...
It ain't no ordinary griddle

weebleswobble · 19/08/2007 21:49

Run him a bath and chuck the new toaster in.

Renaissancewoman · 19/08/2007 21:49

he was proablly thinking that if newschmoo didnt turn him on kenwood

boo64 · 19/08/2007 21:49

I know what's going on here....it's a product placement thing....are you being paid by the people from Lakeland to make us all subconsciously think their products are so damn sexy that people w* with them!??!?

southeastastra · 19/08/2007 21:48

i would seriously worry about his health if it did that to your kenwood toaster

weebleswobble · 19/08/2007 21:48

Katy - I washed it with Fairy.

NewSchmooo · 19/08/2007 21:47

How can he love me? How

Apparently its not always been stainless steel. That came about by accident like he said in the email but he decided that it after. It used to be other stuff from the kitchen. My neighbour got us a really good Kenwood toaster last year. I don't usually have Kenwood but it WAS very good. It did a lot of slice at once. She bought it because her child spilled plant water in our previous one and it wouldn't work.

And then, a few days later THAT wouln't work either. The kenwood one. Turns out HE, that PERVERT, had liked the look of it too. So much so that he ejaculated into it!

THATS why it wouldn't work!

I just can't conceive of this!

I cooked waffles in afterwards. They weren't properly cooked but I ATE them.

We threw it away because HE said the element was corroded.

No kidding!!!

OP posts:
Renaissancewoman · 19/08/2007 21:47

They are watching stainless steel porn on QVC

weebleswobble · 19/08/2007 21:47

PMSL@Piffle

KaySamuels · 19/08/2007 21:47

I have come on mn before for relationship advice and been accused of being a troll - I sat and sobbed. I know trolls come on here but I would rather give anyone the benefit of the doubt - if they are genuine I have helped, if not my conscience is still clear. This is not a rare fetish, but imagine it really did happen to you and you came on here to talk and were laughed at. Or am I( too naive?

Lizzer · 19/08/2007 21:46

Pleeease........

katylui1 · 19/08/2007 21:46

Weebles, has it been through the dishwasher????

Lizzer · 19/08/2007 21:46

WHAT WAS IT??!!!

Piffle · 19/08/2007 21:45

I'm sorry, you said you had a Moben kitchen?

I know this is left field and I do not want to increase your distress in any manner

But could you please tell me how you got the fuckers to properly finish installing the kitchen.

thanks and good luck with the pan thing...

specialmagiclady · 19/08/2007 21:45

Really should be in bed. But can't go.

Lizzer · 19/08/2007 21:44

Alucard can you do a link to dabbles thread pls? too busy refreshing this one to look in active cons

weebleswobble · 19/08/2007 21:43

Here you go love - I'll try the zester.

katylui1 · 19/08/2007 21:43

weebles......time for the bottle stopper .... pass it over....

KaySamuels · 19/08/2007 21:43

Can he be more shocking?

weebleswobble · 19/08/2007 21:42

I can't take it....WHAT DID HE SAY???????

alucard · 19/08/2007 21:42

What has he told you?

BTW Dabbles has started a spunky throw thread.

NormaStanleyFletcher · 19/08/2007 21:42

More shocking than the potato ricer?? ??

specialmagiclady · 19/08/2007 21:42

Pray tell all...

KaySamuels · 19/08/2007 21:42

Is this something you need time to work through in your head, or don't you think you can work through it?

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