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Original poster

DH's obsession or whatever. It's not normal is it.. what should I do?

510 replies

NewSchmooo · 19/08/2007 19:25

Today there was a mix up at work with my shifts and I came home from work only 45 minutes after I'd left.

I found my DH of 7 years naked on the bed surrounded by all the stainless steel kicten implements that we possess and rubbing a knife sharpener gently up and down an intimate area of his body. He was very aroused. He even had pot pourii candles burning and soft lighting.

I knew something was amiss as soon as I came in because it was so quiet and I just had this intinct but I had been putting the bin out for tomorrow so came in through the conservatory and he didn't hear. I just opened the bedroom door (we live in a bungalow) and there he was.

I know its not another woman but what do I do about this. And the softlighting and stuff; he hasn't made that much effort with me for years.

I don't know what to do. Has anyone ever heard on this? A knife sharpener for goodness sake. I feel sick. Have obviously changed my name for this.

OP posts:
Slouchy · 19/08/2007 20:28

Marthamoo - pmsl at you ref to poor saintly Michelle. (not at Michelle, obviuously)

Original poster
NewSchmooo · 19/08/2007 20:27

Well I liked the lakeland set too. Once.

He had obviously been "using" the garlic press. It was in his other hand. The pictures keep flashing thro my mind.

OP posts:
katylui1 · 19/08/2007 20:27

dear god, please tell me that you will get new for cooking with. Remember, the lakeland stuff, however nice, has been used...

Slouchy · 19/08/2007 20:27

And the milk pan?!! Genius. I take my hat off.

Cappuccino · 19/08/2007 20:27

no this is absolute bollocks sorry

you bunch of suckers

she's really going to send an email to her husband which begins with a diatribe about the quality of the kitchenware he is pleasuring himself with

this was from the get go

soft lights schmoft lights

policywonk · 19/08/2007 20:27

This is genius

katylui1 · 19/08/2007 20:26

...waiting with baited breath...

marthamoo · 19/08/2007 20:26

I think you should suggest he gets a cheap set of pans and utensils - maybe from Woolies. You simply can't have him using your decent Lakeland stuff - what would Michelle (RIP) say?

Slouchy · 19/08/2007 20:26

I lol at your email.
If I was going to shag some kitchen implements I would def prefer Lakeland to Argos myself. Much more exclusive.

Original poster
NewSchmooo · 19/08/2007 20:25

I don't normally email him Speccy and we communicate just fine just not about the fucking of kitchenware surprisingly enough. And I can't go in there so email will do. Next step is his.

OP posts:
Original poster
NewSchmooo · 19/08/2007 20:24

Well only a few store card.. not about my sex life that doesn't involve him!

I have sent this. (I know he is on the pc in the bedroom I saw the glow at the window when I was dealing with the cat).

Dear B

I don't know how to compete with a Lakeland kitchenware set. You didn't even like it when we bought it; you said the Argos one was better.

What does it give you that I don't?

And when did you learn to speak French?

You need to clean the stain off the bedcover. I suppose that was what the milk pan was for but my untimely arrival disturbed your aim.

I don't know what to say to you.

I COOK in those pans and our children and WE eat the meals they create.

What do you have have to say to me?

OP posts:
Speccy · 19/08/2007 20:23

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

alucard · 19/08/2007 20:23

are you going to tell him about the email or just wait in the garage until he decides to check.

Doodledootoo · 19/08/2007 20:22

Message withdrawn

katylui1 · 19/08/2007 20:21

'now' not noe

Slouchy · 19/08/2007 20:20

Just noticed this in behaviour/development. Makes a change from naughty step postings!

katylui1 · 19/08/2007 20:20

EMail???? Your Husband????

Seriously, not even the pans would do that.

I'm not trying to be funny, but go, noe, and deal with it. It will be OK. He hasn't changed, you've just found out something you didn't yet know.

Do you really have no secrets???

Original poster
NewSchmooo · 19/08/2007 20:19

Although I could go round the front and bypass the kitchen I suppose.

Just some chocolate and a map. Why??

OP posts:
NormaStanleyFletcher · 19/08/2007 20:19

You don't have snot on your cuffs do you?

weebleswobble · 19/08/2007 20:19

Dp winced when I told him about the garlic press. He's sitting with his legs crossed now.

Doodledootoo · 19/08/2007 20:18

Message withdrawn

Slouchy · 19/08/2007 20:18

Blue marigolds. Nice detail schmoo. Are they the ExtraHeavyDuty ones for washing cars etc/

Original poster
NewSchmooo · 19/08/2007 20:18

I am compiling an email. I can't face the saucepans. I know I'm a coward but I just cant'

OP posts:
Doodledootoo · 19/08/2007 20:18

Message withdrawn

Original poster
NewSchmooo · 19/08/2007 20:17

I didn't even know he knew french apart from "c'est combien" in a gift shop in Paris when we went for our 4th anniversary. And Merci and Bonjour.

I think it was french. I have only a shcool girl smattering.

OP posts: