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DH's obsession or whatever. It's not normal is it.. what should I do?

510 replies

NewSchmooo · 19/08/2007 19:25

Today there was a mix up at work with my shifts and I came home from work only 45 minutes after I'd left.

I found my DH of 7 years naked on the bed surrounded by all the stainless steel kicten implements that we possess and rubbing a knife sharpener gently up and down an intimate area of his body. He was very aroused. He even had pot pourii candles burning and soft lighting.

I knew something was amiss as soon as I came in because it was so quiet and I just had this intinct but I had been putting the bin out for tomorrow so came in through the conservatory and he didn't hear. I just opened the bedroom door (we live in a bungalow) and there he was.

I know its not another woman but what do I do about this. And the softlighting and stuff; he hasn't made that much effort with me for years.

I don't know what to do. Has anyone ever heard on this? A knife sharpener for goodness sake. I feel sick. Have obviously changed my name for this.

OP posts:
weebleswobble · 19/08/2007 21:33

He wants to......what was the rest of it??

ShinyHappyPeopleGoingNuts · 19/08/2007 21:33

[googles madly] Well there is "WÜNSCHEN zu" which means "I want to.."

Ugh.

What else did he say again?

Doodledootoo · 19/08/2007 21:32

Message withdrawn

weebleswobble · 19/08/2007 21:32

I've tried googling it but that's not helping either .

katylui1 · 19/08/2007 21:31

It just means wushun zoo....

No effing idea!!

Sorry for misleading people into thinking I spoke German (if indeed it is german and not some weird stainless steel language)

specialmagiclady · 19/08/2007 21:30

Gah - Katy, it doesn't work. What did he say???

katylui1 · 19/08/2007 21:30

Aww come one schmoo...update us soon please

This has kept me going for hours...

ShinyHappyPeopleGoingNuts · 19/08/2007 21:29

Crikey!

What does Wushen Zoo mean then katy? That link doesn't say!

bookwormtailmum · 19/08/2007 21:29

Skimmed thread only but personally I'd buy new kitchen implements and let him keep the old ones for his use only.

Just thinking of food hygiene rules you know .

Seriously... I don't know what to say.

alucard · 19/08/2007 21:29

aha.

Lizzer · 19/08/2007 21:29

NS has gone in! I wonder what she'll say..? Hope she returns to the garage soon, I can't be left in suspense all night. Dp is intrigued too

specialmagiclady · 19/08/2007 21:28

You go girl - go and talk to him!

katylui1 · 19/08/2007 21:28

Quick, get her back!!!!!

He was just saying 'wushun zoo!!! look!

And that's OK, right?..

Dabbles · 19/08/2007 21:27

oh come on! a Stanless steel chastity belt! priceless....

weebleswobble · 19/08/2007 21:27

Yes, but if it's not a well known brand he probably won't do it on it

alucard · 19/08/2007 21:26

I didn't say it was a well known brand. I said it was from Mexico

katylui1 · 19/08/2007 21:25

God No THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT!!!!!

What I meant was that you don't need to know what he was grunting cos that's the same as asking 'was she any good'!!!!!!!

Now I know you are taking the piss.

I have been glued for hours, supping the wine and am too pissed to comprehend anymore!!

Theclosetpagan · 19/08/2007 21:25

dabbles

weebleswobble · 19/08/2007 21:25

Alucard....the throw isn't a well know brand

persephonesnape · 19/08/2007 21:24

If my husband had been lacklustre in the tadger department and i walked in to him knife-sharpening his knob into a splendid erection, i'd jump on it. and if he likes cold things, there's always ice cubes and cyberman outfits.

alucard · 19/08/2007 21:24

But isn't the garlic press more of an addition than a replacement? He must still do it with you because you have that nice throw that your mother got in Mexico.

Dabbles · 19/08/2007 21:23

YOU MUST BUY ONE OF THESE IT WILL TOTURE HIM!!!!

TheLadyEvenstar · 19/08/2007 21:23

Right i best go and have a bath lol hopefully will lessen the tightness in belly from all this laughing....

Sorry NS i dont mean to laugh.....Honestly...

My older couin had a partner once who could only get off while wearingm arigolds, hoovering and being on a phone chat line on his mobile lololololololol

weebleswobble · 19/08/2007 21:23

If he doesn't admit "she" is the garlic press, hit him with the nut crackers. Garlic presses have never ever been known to be male!

Lizzer · 19/08/2007 21:22
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