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to share the things my BIL has moaned about whilst staying at our house for the past 3 days?

629 replies

BanKittenHeels · 15/09/2019 15:50

Amazon Prime Video doesn’t have the new Quentin Tarantino film that has just come out at the cinema. Ergo Amazon Prime is a waste of money.

The shower screen in the guest bathroom has a stationary rather than hinged shower screen.

That someone used the loo in the middle of the night and he could hear them flush - his bedroom door was 3/4 open.

We have stair gates, so our children don’t break their necks. “Really inconvenient”

The Thai restaurant sent us too many prawn crackers. They sent an appropriate amount for the number of people, actually.

My deodorant is blue. And what?

We don’t have an endless supply of spare clothes in his size and to his taste.

His hair was still in the shower in his en suite when he went back to use it the next day.

The towels I put out for him are white.

Our front gate is too squeaky.

The planes overhead are too low.

We have too many rugs.

He can hear traffic when in the garden.

Our dogs won’t cuddle him.

Our children wear shorts.

The settings of the seats in the car we lent him weren’t to his liking.

He doesn’t like the preset radio stations on our car radio.

My DH (his brother) “doesn’t wear a hat”??????

We don’t have his very specific music taste available to him on vinyl, although we did think to search out appropriate Spotify playlists for him but “that’s not quite the same authenticity”.

The local swimming pool (in a large city) keeps “provincial, British hours”.

Microwave steamers are “excessive gadgets”. Then 30 minutes later, “I suppose you could steam veg in your steamer, have you thought of that?” No shit!

None of the 3 duvets we offered him were suitable.

I use my inhaler too frequently.

Why do I have rosehip oil in the bathroom, it’s of no use to anyone.

Confused HmmAngry

OP posts:
WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 21/09/2019 19:11

Just had to nip out the back and double check my DP wasn’t the culprit grin.. he’s a fun sponge/human eeyore if he’s stressed.

You should buy him one of these - styled on JRM, unless I'm very much mistaken Grin

to share the things my BIL has moaned about whilst staying at our house for the past 3 days?
Weezol · 21/09/2019 18:28

Lamps are pretentious “I noticed you weren’t using overhead lighting” yep because I was neither waiting for a taxi to take me to the airport nor is it Christmas morning.

Have you thought sbout setting up a twitter feed to celebrate him? Your additional comments are properly funny.

Using this thread as a reference you've easily got one a day up to Christmas. I'd definitely follow it.

The guy from 'shitmydadsays' did okay out of monetising a mild irritant!

BanKittenHeels · 21/09/2019 18:11

YetAnotherBeckyMumsnet ha, how funny that BIL made classics. I think you had best hurry up and change the colour of the website because it’s too similar to my deodorant.

OP posts:
Lunafortheloveogod · 21/09/2019 15:07

Just had to nip out the back and double check my DP wasn’t the culprit Grin.. he’s a fun sponge/human eeyore if he’s stressed.

Our grass was previously too mossy, I showed him how to mulch it with the lawn mower so the grass grew better.. now the grass grows too quick.

Also we mustn’t use weed killer incase it kills any other plants... we have one tree and two bushes ages way from the slabbed patio unless I run like the sound of music with the weed killer they’re safe.

Pressure washing the slabs was too wet..

The dog was too hairy while blowing her coat Grin

I just sit with one eyebrow up or tell him to feck off. When he’s not stressed (thank fuck his job isn’t stressful lol) he’s fine and very cheery.. he doesn’t drink, maybe he needs wine or gin.

MsMightyTitanAndHerTroubadours · 21/09/2019 15:04

Maybe he's not allowed to moan at home so has to save it all up for when he is off the Home Premises :o

Also I have a query about the plants complaint....is it the overall quantity of plants OR the wide distribution of plants that irks him so much?

JapaneseBirdPainting · 21/09/2019 15:02

Yep Motoko 'Mummy'.

That's one of the reasons it has stuck in my head! Grin

FWIW, he says 'Mummy and Father'.

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 21/09/2019 14:58

His wife is a fiery South American woman, I don’t think he would dare cross her.

Don't you worry about her, she can give as good as she gets and then some. She was the subject of another thread*, visiting the OP in her home near a farm in the countryside and was utterly outraged at the fact that there were farm/country noises and smells nearby.

*at least, I assume it must have been her.... Grin

Motoko · 21/09/2019 14:51

Meant to add, I was 10 when I had a very serious conversation with my parents, to inform them that now I was 10, I felt that using the terms "Mummy" and "Daddy", were too babyish, and from now on, I would call them "Mum" and "Dad"!

Motoko · 21/09/2019 14:48

Mummy doesn't cook roast chicken like that'.

Apart from his rudeness, "Mummy"? A grown man?

ChicCroissant · 21/09/2019 14:42

I admire your view on life, OP, and your general fortitude in the face of extreme moaning Star

Cherrysoup · 21/09/2019 14:34

@YetAnotherBeckyMumsnet 🤣

RandomMess · 21/09/2019 14:33

Hurrrah for classics!

ParoxetineQueen · 21/09/2019 14:33

My FIL reminiscing about nutmeg on rice pudding, went out and bought cinnamon then complained that it didn’t taste the same

SchadenfreudePersonified · 21/09/2019 14:15

Not as many birds in my garden as his

That's that bitch at the back putting our high quality fatballs to lure your robin to her birdtables isn't it? Cow!

My end of quiet cul de sac house is louder then his end of village cottage

it's all of those noisy bloody birds in the garden over the back.

Sausages have gone too far and have too much meat in them these days

We've got to do something with our many relatives. This way it's win-win for us and the butcher.

DH getting a payrise means he's overpaid now

I can see why that's upsetting.

Too many boats at a coastal village shore

Bloody ocean - right near the beach!

My poppies had too many ladybird larvae on them

Greenfly would be a much better alternative.

JapaneseBirdPainting · 21/09/2019 14:08

those words were *accommodation money

*leaned over me

SchadenfreudePersonified · 21/09/2019 14:08

he has always been like this and as a child once complained about the atmosphere in a restaurant.

He's not Stewie off "Family Guy" is he?

JapaneseBirdPainting · 21/09/2019 14:07

Oh this will probably out me, but DH has a friend like this who invites himself to stay about once a year when on a business trip so he can take the accommodaiton mnonye and pocket it.

It;'s constant moaning. I am not sure what the final straw was in the end. It might have been when he elaned over me while I was cooking dinner and said; 'Mummy doesn't cook roast chicken like that'. Or when he asked us to host a cocktail party at our own home for the people in his team and magnaminously commented that we were 'welcome to stay' for it ourselves.

Whatever it was, he went missing very soon after that and I'm admitting nothing.

Sedlescombe · 21/09/2019 13:53

He's gonna hate this thread. Do show it to him

ThumbWitchesAbroad · 21/09/2019 13:51

Excellent move, Becky! Grin

Sorry to hear about your very ill relative, BanKittenHeels but glad that your BIL woes are actually helping to lighten your days now you've brought them to MN and had them immortalised in Classics.

Thanks and Wine for you.

64sNewName · 21/09/2019 13:02

Hooray for the Classics decision!

I’m sorry times are so tough though OP. Sending positive thoughts your way Flowers

Rhinosarefatunicorns19 · 21/09/2019 10:32

Just had a genius thought, this man could be a YouTube channel all by himself!! like thought for the day only more inane and annoying. You could make a fortune!

Rhinosarefatunicorns19 · 21/09/2019 10:30

He is the gift that keeps on giving

Surprised you haven't spat tea across the room laughing when he comes out with these little gems Grin

theoriginalmadambee · 21/09/2019 10:24

Uhh thanks becky 😀

@BanKittenHeels, Re. Dishwasher/DH replacement.
Not only is you patience renouned, I think you will make an excellent couples therapist/interior designer as well 😂.

Hope you all have a lovely moany day.

YetAnotherBeckyMumsnet · 21/09/2019 10:12

Hello @BanKittenHeels, we think it's only right and fair to mark the final day of your BIL's visit by immortalising this thread in Classics.

We would have done it sooner but:

Our chocolate biscuits had chocolate in them
The tea was in a blue cup
The sun was shining in through the window and it made us blink
A squirrel moved a nut in the garden

FredaFrogspawn · 21/09/2019 08:04

You will die
Grin