Aibu to ask for the most "WTF" complaints

I was waitressing at a tossers' millionaires' ball when another waiter barged into me and accidentally tipped a tray of red wines all down my white blouse. I went to change and was intercepted by a millionaire telling me to get him a glass of red wine. I was dripping wet and stained red. I told him I was off to get changed. 'But get me the red wine first' he said. So I said of course and disappeared to get changed.

RelaisBlu
I was tempted to complain about the science teacher's very short dresses and bare legs, until someone pointed out she was the Headteacher's daughter.

School staff too. I was reported as I was in a local pub drinking with my friends.Reported by a 16 yr old student who was in there having a drink.

Had a lady return a product to a shop that was about ten years old and long discontinued and then furious she wouldn’t be refunded.

A parent complained that their child had seen me in a swimming costume

This reminds me of a parents evening where a Dad complained in all seriousness that I was too young & pretty to be his teenage son's teacher because it distracted him and how could he be expected to learn anything?

I replied sarcastically perhaps I should wear a balaclava or put a paper bag over my head but he said no that won't help will it because what about your body?

The best bit was the look his wife gave him....

When working at a skilled nursing facility a resident's daughter berated me because the cost of her mother's cable TV subscription had gone up by $2 per month. I explained to her that residents bought the service directly from the company and we had nothing to do with the pricing. She told me that if such a prestigious facility as ours had complained properly the company would have not raised prices for all 2 million of their customers.

When working in a hospital a woman who I'd never seen before marched up to me and called me a right c*. When I gave her a look of astonishment she told me that she had just checked with Dr. Google and if he had given her father dandelion extract he would not have died of brain cancer.

Had a gentleman come into the fuel station where I was working to pay for his fuel. He was quite insistant he'd only put £20 in, so I explained he'd put in 20 litres, he'd been looking at the wrong display.

He huffed and puffed, and told us we should put something on the pumps to say more clearly which was which. I pointed out politely that one display was labelled 'sale in litres' and one had an inch high £ symbol, plus the words 'cost of sale' on it.

He muttered something angrily about ' like talking to the deaf, stupid cow' and stormed off.

I somehow refrained from making any comments about blind drivers.

Sorry about typos

DD works in a toy shop and now hates the general public
Last night she was helping a woman who wanted a Buzz light year outfit for her grandson.
She waslooking at an electronic helmet, it was for aged 5 and over. DD asked how old he was, the answer was nearly 3.
She explained it might be to heavy etc for him and pointed out it was for older children. She spent ages height the woman get something suitable.
The woman picked something else and was happy, chatting away and thanking by her for her help.
Still chatying away when she was paying she said to DD, it's a good job you didn't sell me that helmet because if he had been injured it would by have been your fault and I'd have got you arrested.

I came home to a message on my answerphone reserving a table for four at 8pm. So I did the nice thing and called the lady back to let them know they'd got the wrong number.

First of all she accused me of lying; then had a go at me for not being the restaurant she'd phoned

I’ve had users (it help desk) complain that their keyboard is too shiny. It worked perfectly but according to her it’s shiny-ness meant that she couldn’t use it... and another user decided to swear at me and call me a fucking idiot because I couldn’t reset her password on a system we didn’t administer...

In a previous life; I’ve had tourists complain to me because staff were speaking in welsh (their first bloody language!) to each other. According to them, they should always speak English if there were monoglot English speakers within earshot. I had great fun telling them that although they were clearly paranoid, the staff members were actually discussing someone else’s order in their native language and it had absolutely sod all to do with them and their order. Weirdly they seemed shocked that the world didn’t revolve around them...

I had a man just the other day, ask me to check and pay on his scratchcard and lottery tickets.

The scratchcard wasn't a winner. It's all automated, we scan the bar code, input the four digit number and the machine tells us how much you've won, there's no way to fiddle it. I told the man it wasn't a winner.

He kept pointing to the box that said something about 'scratch off one bag and win a tenner'. He'd scratched off one bag. But the card wasn't a winner (I've no idea why I didn't have time to read the small print that probably said you had to scratch off one bag and match it with some other obscure symbol somewhere). He tried to insist, I ran it through the machine again - still not a winner.

So he insisted on having it back, plus his non-winning lottery tickets, to take somewhere else to get his winnings...

I'd love to have seen his face when that machine wouldn't pay out either.

The missing bit says I worked in Accessorize!

I don’t know if my boss was winding me up but she said she’d had a complaint that when a (nasty piece of work ) customer was rude to me on phone I ended the conversation by saying
“ have a lovely day “ .... not sure if boss was lying or it happened but .... none so queer as folk as the old saying goes 🙄

Woman that went absolutely mad because I wouldn’t give her a refund on a hat she bought in Debenhams - I worked in Apparently a hat is a hat & I should have just given her the money, why should she go all the way to another shop blah blah blah. Debenhams was opposite the shop I was working in, no more than a 30 second walk.

Angelasashes
I agree. I get sensory overload with music or a lot of noise. I only a very finite amount of energy due to having ME and noise can make me “crash” ie have to collapse on the ground or a sofa if close enough. Someone shouting in / near my ear or similar sound can have the same effect especially if it is high pitched. Idiots, who insist on clapping incredibly loudly to create an echo also cause it.

Last night my colleague served a lady and she left, returned few minutes later, jumped the queue and shouted why are you ripping me off, why are you racist....colleague was a bit shocked, im the manager on duty so asked what the problem was, she said she was short changed, she spent £4.65 and you only gave me 35p change (as she slames it on the counter), i asked how much did she give colleague and she said £5.00...still going on about ripping her off and colleague is racist......i said yes £5.00 minus £4.65 is 35p....you could see the penny drop and I asked her for an apology!

I was checking reviews for a luxury hotel and someone gave it a one star because someone touched her leg on a snorkelling trip arranged by the hotel. Anyone who has ever been on a group snorkelling trip will tell you she's lucky it wasn't a kick in the face.

That reminds of the story of the American diplomat who asked why the Queen has built Windsor Castle so close to Heathrow instead of somewhere quieter Probably apocryphal, but I really hope it’s true!

I did also hear a sarcastic Beefeater at the Tower of London explain to someone with a buggy that William the Conquerer has forgotten to order lifts installed when it had been built 1,000 years ago so they'd have to leave their buggy at the bottom.

Used to work in a cafe that done a 2 course meal for £6.00. It stated clearly on the menu EXCLUDING drinks. Customer comes to pay and asks why I'm charging for drinks, I tell her drinks are not part of the offer. She says well it says on the menu drinks. I point out it says excluding drinks. She complains we really should make it more clear and looks at me as if I'm stupid .

I'm sure there's more but that one always sticks out for me. Almost as annoying as the customers who would ask for a drink of juice or a roll and when you asked what kind would look at you as you had two heads and answer in a tone that suggests you are an imbecile for not knowing.

I once received a phone call from someone telling me that the river was a funny colour. I was covering reception for a high-end wallpaper company which didn't even manufacture the paper in this country; it was an office and warehouse. I'm still not sure what they wanted me to do.

Another time I had an email complaining tbatbthe phones weren't ringing (thrre was an outage). I replied explaining anf apologising, then offered to pass on a message to the relevant dept if they could advise me which one they wanted. Back cane the response "oh, can't I ring you then?". .

I was called a liar a couple of weeks ago by someone on the telephone cold calling work.
He asked (with a fairly strong accent) if he could speak to the owner of the business about the electricity.
I explained (politely) that we are a church, so we don't have an "owner of the business" and the people that deal with the electricity contracts are volunteers and aren't available at that time.
He responded with he knew we weren't a church and could I put him through to the owner.
I suggested that he probably had got the wrong number if he didn't think he was calling a church-"St Paul's Church" is a kind of giveaway.
This continued for some time until he said. "Madam, you are a liar. I am standing outside and I can see it isn't a church."
So I said "That's great, if you come in through the main doors, you'll see the reception straight ahead and I will show you round the church. I look forward to seeing you in 5 minutes."
Surprisingly he didn't come.

I had someone in to interview. for a very clearly described role She had a counselling background and while that is great in terms of skill that was not the role she was interviewing for (support worker, so also needs to be able to offer practical support as well as emotional support)

She answered questions solely as if she were interviewing for a counselling job ignoring half of the job spec so we explained the role again in the hope of getting some more relevant details in the answers.

She replied well yes but you could change the organisation to fit my skills though I am after all a trained counsellor!

Eh no we have a counselling service already we are recruiting for the support work service!