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People keep having sex in my hedge...

926 replies

eurgh · 25/06/2018 17:00

I guess it's more of a WWYD as I know I'm NBU but every few nights people (I assume the same two) keep having sex in the hedge which divides my back garden from the road behind. It's pretty brazen because there's no real cover to hide under!
Every few nights I'll be out sitting with my new rescue dog and letting her potter about and I'll hear my hedge making groany sex noises. I'm so tempted to cough loudly or say something but for some reason I just keep quiet and feel weird listening to other people's sex noises!
So I guess more for fun, I ask you, what would you do?

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kitkatsky · 04/04/2025 22:38

Let your dog on them? 😂 Sympathies. Used to live next door to an old people pub and often had people shagging up against our wheelie bins

Errmmmmmmmmmmm · 30/03/2025 19:04

ZOMBIE’S HAVING SEX IN THE HEDGE!!!

StroppyWoman · 28/03/2025 08:30

Yutes · 28/03/2025 08:25

Aw thank you. Had no idea. That makes perfect sense. 😂😂
still quite funny though

Here they all are - enjoy!

www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5302943-mnhq-aibu-to-share-25-of-our-all-time-favourite-classic-threads-to-mark-mumsnets-25th-birthday?reply=143136724

Yutes · 28/03/2025 08:25

StroppyWoman · 28/03/2025 08:22

They are on the list of MN’s 25 best threads to celebrate its 25th birthday, so are getting views.

Aw thank you. Had no idea. That makes perfect sense. 😂😂
still quite funny though

StroppyWoman · 28/03/2025 08:22

Yutes · 28/03/2025 08:21

How do these zombie threads get resurrected? 😂

Edited

They are on the list of MN’s 25 best threads to celebrate its 25th birthday, so are getting views.

Yutes · 28/03/2025 08:21

Redglitter · 27/03/2025 20:17

6 year old zombie thread!!

How do these zombie threads get resurrected? 😂

Redglitter · 27/03/2025 20:17

6 year old zombie thread!!

Bernardo1 · 27/03/2025 20:15

Singlenotsingle · 25/06/2018 17:27

Put the radio on? It might put them off their stride

This.
I'd suggest the 'Archers' or maybe some Opera, Nessun Dorma? or maybe some Wagner.

HardyCrow · 27/03/2025 20:12

Keep a bucket of water handy?

bilbodog · 27/03/2025 18:33

ZOMBIE thread!

Calloja23 · 27/03/2025 18:29

Turn the hose on the hedge full blast!!

JoBoJoBo · 23/10/2024 19:40

Surprised your dog doesn't bark at them mine would !I would put up a motion activated floodlight then play loud music .

JoBoJoBo · 23/10/2024 19:24

eurgh · 25/06/2018 17:34

@viques I've never heard any of my local hedgehogs ask for a finger in the bum... Grin
🦔

Ha ha.Maybe they are rough sleepers who do code brown eeew

Hawkins003 · 21/03/2023 20:28

motherjulia86 · 17/03/2023 22:00

🙈🙈🙈

Indeed

motherjulia86 · 17/03/2023 22:00

🙈🙈🙈

Errmmmmmmmmmmm · 27/02/2023 09:55

i want to know if they're still having sex in the hedge!

Hawkins003 · 26/02/2023 20:22

Chorusgirl · 26/02/2023 07:54

Just coming here from 2023 to say it most definitely IS a Classic! Congratulations, MN History salutes you 👍🏻

Same here

Hawkins003 · 26/02/2023 20:22

eurgh · 25/06/2018 17:00

I guess it's more of a WWYD as I know I'm NBU but every few nights people (I assume the same two) keep having sex in the hedge which divides my back garden from the road behind. It's pretty brazen because there's no real cover to hide under!
Every few nights I'll be out sitting with my new rescue dog and letting her potter about and I'll hear my hedge making groany sex noises. I'm so tempted to cough loudly or say something but for some reason I just keep quiet and feel weird listening to other people's sex noises!
So I guess more for fun, I ask you, what would you do?

Does it still happen op, ? Yes it's 2023 all, but it came up on facebook as mumsnet classics

Chorusgirl · 26/02/2023 07:54

Just coming here from 2023 to say it most definitely IS a Classic! Congratulations, MN History salutes you 👍🏻

MelodyinLondon · 12/11/2019 07:40

leave a nice picnic blanket and some pillows there for them.

DanFmDorking · 07/07/2018 21:24

"When will you be mine?",
"Now!", she shouted, "Give it!".
They found their love divine,
United in the privet.

northernlites · 07/07/2018 13:14

You take me to the h-edge of heaven
Tell me that my soul's forgiven
Hide you baby's eyes and we can,
You take me to the h-edge of heaven
One last time might be forever... 😂

TheRealNotdog · 07/07/2018 13:07

I'm on the h-edge, of glory...

bellinisurge · 07/07/2018 10:37

Don't push me 'cos I'm close to the .....he--edge.

TornFromTheInside · 06/07/2018 21:47

I've been outshone!

Bugger!

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