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Original poster

MIL and her picnic hamster

380 replies

insancerre · 28/05/2018 13:39

On a visit to MIL for her birthday
She told us SIL has bought BIL a picnic hamster as a present
After several silent moments during which DH and I tried desperately hard to contain ourselves and not look at each other, she finally announced it was in fact, a picnic hamper
DH calmly said " a hamster is a small, furry creature"

It's comedy gold here
Any good MILisms where you are?

OP posts:
Avonandice · 29/05/2018 16:14

My mother stood in the middle of sainsburys and with a large marrow in hand bellowed across to me that ' all I need now is a really good stuffing'

I am never taking her there again

3luckystars · 29/05/2018 16:01

It’s the noise they make!
Maybe you just had to be there. Sorry if it’s not funny but it made us all laugh at the time. I hope it’s ok that I posted.

BeesAndMist · 29/05/2018 15:18

I struggle to see the issue with calling a cock a cock. If you really didn’t like it couldn’t you call it a cockerel? Wtf is a cockadoodledoo?

JohnnyKarate · 29/05/2018 15:12

My mum loves a McDonalds coffee and likes saving up her little coffee bean stickers. The only problem is I have had to stop going with her because she will not stop asking for a McCappuccino or a McLatte. Last time I went with her I asked for a Sprite, and yes you guessed it, she orders me a McSprite.

Medium McChicken McSandwich, with a McCappuccino, please.

I can’t keep a straight face and she refuses to believe that they haven’t named every menu item McWhateveryoufancy.

BertrandRussell · 29/05/2018 15:07

But a male bird is called a cock. Words can have more than one meaning. Easy to explain that to kids. Apart from anything else, it makes incidents like that funnier........

3luckystars · 29/05/2018 15:00

I know it’s not called a cockadoodledoo but I had the children with me and my mother kept saying, ‘look at your fathers cock, isn’t it huge? He had it out on the table last night and I couldn’t believe the size of it. He is just thrilled with that cock’ so I was so embarrassed I kept calling it a cockadoodledoo to stop it. I was like a tomato Blush

paranoiamumma · 29/05/2018 14:55

My mil was telling once me how she saw on the news that "these tambourine parks were dangerous "!

MyKingdomForBrie · 29/05/2018 14:52

@3luckystars it’s definitely not called a cockadoodledoo... Confused

My dm announced to me the other day that she is ‘such a slut’ Blush she meant of course in the old sense that she isn’t a big fan of housework.. Grin

Ginosaji · 29/05/2018 14:24

@Lolimax i think i love your mil Grin

Lolimax · 29/05/2018 14:09

My MIL’s corner shop is CostCutters. She calls it CockCutters.

MNHQ
AnyaMumsnet · 29/05/2018 14:07

Hi MNers,

This thread has been nominated for classics, so we're moving it there now. It made us all chuckle at MNHQ!

starfishmummy · 29/05/2018 13:48

My mother was once discussing that there were water shrimps coming out of the taps and we'd caught one in the water filter (harmless I sects in the water supply). She then turned and said we didn't used to get these orgasms in the water....

I'll have a glass of that please!!

bananamonkey · 29/05/2018 12:54

Grin at these

Christmas moose = reindeer surely?!

Ginosaji · 29/05/2018 12:01

@moralminority 😂😂😂 sounds like the title of a really bad porn movie

moralminority · 29/05/2018 11:53

My gran once asked some of her young grandchildren if they wanted to watch Willy Wanker on tv, much to the surprise of the adults in the room.

cringeworthypickybits · 29/05/2018 11:46

Who would believe in rural Suffolk they have gerbils in the church flowers this week! Gerberas I believe Grin

Ginosaji · 29/05/2018 11:41

@PanPanPanPing i was never christened so not me lol

@Pippinfi it must be catching, when me & dh refused to buy her durex she asked why we were being mean by saying no and laughing our heads off (she had mentioned decorating a few days previously so we realised at once what she was trying to ask for)

To be fair to her once we explained she looked horrified that she has asked her parents for such a thing and then joined in the laughter Grin

Pippinfi · 29/05/2018 11:33

I once told FIL who'd offered to do some decorating for us to get some Durex paint.

MargotLovedTom1 · 29/05/2018 11:30

Back in the 80s, my Nana genuinely thought a news journalist was referring to shites in the Middle East.

PanPanPanPing · 29/05/2018 11:27

I was half-wondering whether you might be one of Mum's goddaughters, one of whose DD would be about 15 now (I'm ashamed to say I can't remember), but I wouldn't have put it past Mum to have had one of her hilarious conversations about paint in front of the goddaughters much younger DD some years ago Grin

Ginosaji · 29/05/2018 11:16

Oh thats good @PanPanPanPing means your remembering fond memories that will make you smile 😊

PanPanPanPing · 29/05/2018 11:14

Don't be daft - of course you didn't upset me - no need to apologise! Mum died a good few years ago, and actually it's threads like this - and RL conversations - which help me remember all the lovely - and funny - things about her.

Ginosaji · 29/05/2018 11:09

Oh crap, so sorry @PanPanPanPing i missed the first bit, hope I didn't upset you Thanks

PanPanPanPing · 29/05/2018 11:01

"has she been talking to my dd??"

Not in recent years, Ginosaji, no! Grin Grin

Ginosaji · 29/05/2018 10:56

@PanPanPanPing 😂 has she been talking to my dd?? Dd (15) recently came up to me & dh and said "when you guys get paid, can you buy me some durex please? I might need alot tho"

Fyi, it turns out she wants to paint her bedroom Grin

Feeling hungry so would love a doubledicker and some stiffy cocky pudding Grin

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