Expats, tell me what aspect or social norm of your new country was strange to you?

The nhs isn't perfect but it's still a lot better than the healthcare set up in many other countries especially USA where those in most desperate need (homeless, mentally ill, poor...) are left suffering, medics are beholden to drug companies and there seems few ethical boundaries.

Yep - may not be perfect but far better system than the alternatives.

Where have you NHS naysayers come from?? There is no way I’d want a system like the US, where poor people can’t afford basic healthcare. That is not a society I want to live in. And having to pay for things like giving birth is fucking ridiculous IMO. And God help you if your baby ends up ill with a lengthy NICU stay, it’s worrying enough in that situation without having to think about paying for it as well!!!

The NHS is something people will fight for to the death. But it is not free and never will be. Maybe at point of entry but taxation contributions and NI funding will never be enough to keep it OK anymore, sadly.

It is being run down to be sold off and privatised. Watch this space.

I've moved to Britain and I find the national hard on for the NHS impossible to understand-do you just not understand how shockingly bad the service it provides is? And why bag on Bournemouth it being free when it isn't? Do British people just not understand the concepts of government borrowing, taxation, budget deficit etc?

What’s an expat again?

Oh yeah, a migrant. Just a well off , white, English speaking one.

Opening presents during the birthday party is the done thing here in Australia too.

bureaucracy - omg opening the first bank account was a nightmare. took months to sort out. meanwhile my work paid me in cash

My work wouldn’t do cash. I had to get paid into my friend’s bank account and then withdraw it in cash. It was bizarre.

I could work in the country, had an NI number, but couldn’t open a bank account?

uk (london I know london is different to rest of uk)

• disregard to many rules, especially traffic rules by drivers. red lights seem merely advisory
• queues. what queues?
• dirty dr/hospital waiting rooms
• general selfishness (though also incredible kindness)
• bureaucracy - omg opening the first bank account was a nightmare. took months to sort out. meanwhile my work paid me in cash

there are no impolite nations, nor inhospitable nations. They are polite according to the norms of their society

Irish psyche very similar to the Russian psyche.

I am furiously agreeing with you, @Toomanynamestoremember and think that society will account for a good chunk of the different influences. For examples, customs in rural places are likely to show similarities, so that everyone being expected to attend a funeral would be understandable in a rural area, just be impractical in a big city. Likewise, people working for a big corporate organisation will have much in common with others in the same type of role, in the same way that the experience of a waiter or waitress will have things in common with others, regardless of the country in which they are working.

Cambodianhound

“Kiasu”

never give way, never lose face. Don’t acknowledge or move for emergency vehicles. Never rver indicate, never give way to help a driver out of a side road etc. If you see someone indicating on the motorway to pull out into a space in front of you - speed up to cut them off.

I used to pull out of my side road into the main road and just sit there till someone finally had to stop to let me out. The faces were interesting.

I also had a group of grown adults stand round in a circle taking pics and videos of my 6 yr old when he got into a fight with his friend / both rolling on the ground hitting each other. Ah, glory days - i do miss it sll actually.

Same in Korea with the ambulances, really shocks me every time. In fact most of the stuff mentioned about Hong Kong is similar.

Ambulances/Fire Engines with sirens/lights are not really given any sort of precedence or right of way - they sit in traffic with everyone else (no one moves)

Gah. Fat fingers

Mathanxiety, the thing I found really tricky is visiting multiple households or visiting after having just eaten a large meal when traveling in Eastern Europe. I’ll never forget the look on one lady’s face when I made the faux pas of telling her I was really sorry but We just came from visiting X and I overate so I literally can’t take another little bite. I don’t think I even have room for a coffee, I feel so full. The look of shock on her face... You would have thought I just called her a fat slag. . I had to quickly learn to I fein upset tummis and learn to politely accept mineral waters that aid in digestion.

Following on from my other coments about selfies.

Yesterday I ordered a coffee, sat down whilst said coffee was being made, as normal but instead of the usual cup, there was a tray with an empty cup and the boiling milk and another smaller container with the coffee.
The server then started to pour the milk etc, whilst saying look photo please, whilst 2 new members of staff snapped away. No just stop, Im paying for a cup of coffee not a photo shoot with the westerner at your convenience.

Also if you go to the cinema, apart from the 12 min interval, in the middle of the film, the national anthem is played before the main film comes on, you must stand as well and anyone just getting to their seats or on the stairs they just stop and stand with every one else then continue on.

Hong Kong:

Ambulances/Fire Engines with sirens/lights are not really given any sort of precedence or right of way - they sit in traffic with everyone else (no one moves)

All lifts have door close buttons - and people will hammer on them regardless of whether people are trying to get in or get out

People don't hold doors for each other - but attempt to squeeze through before it closes behind them. This is to do with germs and not manners - no-one wants to tough the door.

Very social eaters - locals rarely eat at desks at work but eat together (lunch time lasts over an hour)

Obsession with little toys - adult professionals have desks covered in things like Hello Kitty and little dolls/bears

ShiftyMcGifty Tue 20-Mar-18 14:30:37
...it’s not just casually saying “would you like a cuppa” - which any polite Russian would decline, as it is the etiquette and wait for the host to ask and insist at least once or twice. It’s a little “no no-I insist-oh go on then” that is an art form in and of itself.

You’re ushered to sit and the host (or a family member you weren’t even aware of) emerges from the kitchen with trays of snacks and nibbles... crisps and pretzels (huge variety), all types of nuts, cakes, cookies... it is normal to whip out a chartcuterie board with all types of salami and cured meats too.

Which you don’t touch, as a guest.
Until the little dance begins again... “no no-I insist-no no I’m not hungry- oh just have a tiny bit-well-oh go on then just a small plate or I’ll get offended - oh well just a small piece then”

This is so true, and also true of Ireland, though substituting full roast ham and chicken dinner with potatoes, peas and gravy plus dessert for charcuterie, snacks and nibbles. One day I ate three dinners while down the country showing off little DD1.

Maybe it also explains why I feel so at home with my Russian friends and the cup-of-tea-crackers-cheese-sausage-blinis-sour-cream-jam-dance. And a little jar of home preserved cherries or similar pressed into my hand when I leave even if we may see each other again in a week.

Wrt opening birthday presents during the party - this was the done thing where I live in the US. It happened after the birthday meal, slice of cake each, and singing of Happy Birthday. Once children turned about 10 or 11 parties began to get smaller and it wasn't done any more, and also at that point everyone started giving gift cards to Claires and such.

There were never any issues with it - no children ever tried to play with any presents, it was treated as funny if presents were duplicated, and often the children assisted whatever adult was trying to keep track of who gave what for the purposes of thank you cards. The opening was accompanied with 'oooohs' and 'aaaaahs' and applause, and the party child said a nice 'thank you' to each guest.

If you swim outside of the lifeguard season here you can get ordered out of the water. Rip tides and currents close to shore change seasonally.

Brit living in a Spanish area of southern Spain, non touristy.

People not recycling, everything goes into the rubbish.
Using street skips for rubbish and also taking anything useful out of said skip if anyone feels like it.
Siesta, the working day is so long!
General chaos that is my local supermarket, super noisy, shouting etc, not for a day with a hangover!
No manners on footpaths, no awareness there might be anyone behind them, I run and they particularly hate me and I'm very polite and don't expect right of way but my god they make me angry.
Drinking beer is acceptable walking down the street.
Sunday closing of shops but I like that.
The police take no messing and security guards are often equipped with guns, I think the UK needs more of this.
Sunday is a real family day and all generations go out.
If you ask have you anything vegetarian, yes we have tuna, I'm still considered a freak in someplaces.
Drink driving.
Swimming in the sea outside the summer season is considered odd.
Taking off your coat before summer will get you lots of dirty looks from older Spanish ladies.
Religious festivals, parading, practicing for the parade, I don't know if they are really religious or it's a good old excuse for a piss up but they can be carrying these heavy artefacts in the sun for hours so fair dues.
Churros and chocolate and so many of them, sickly.

I probably have more but all in all I love Spain.

@SundayGirls Bidets have their own little towels placed on a hook next to them (usually one per person or one per couple) and you also get special bidet detergent/soap You can have a bidet as often as you wish, but usually you'd be more inclined to have one after you've been for a number 2. You use your hands just like you would to wash your face. In the summer people also use bidets to freshen up between showers - nothing nicer than a quick bidet when you're hot and sweaty, also you can wash your feet in it (this calls for a separate foot towel). You would normally only use a bidet at home and not at other people's houses.

After I explained all this to my British DH, he was mightily confused when we visited my parents and there was goldfish in the bidet (my mum was washing out the tank and had plonked them in there for a few minutes).

BananainPyjama Private school is very common here

Actually, they would probably be better referred to as non-Gov't schools, as many of these are Catholic systemic schools, which are definitely not considered to be private schools and are generally reasonably affordable. Then, there are other schools, some under the umbrella term GPS (Greater Public Schools), which is a different matter.

I went to my local Catholic school back in the Middle Ages because my parents were Catholic and it was just automatic to send your child to one. They were adamant, as Labor voters, that it wasn't ever to be considered a private school - which it certainly was not.

Nowadays, they sort of tout themselves as a cheaper alternative to private schools with an emphasis on pastoral care.

I also couldn’t get used to driving there, lack of indication and so much honking the horns ( I was in Boston).

Yes - this is exactly what drivers are like in Boston. I dread driving there! And I used to live in London.

They are polite according to the norms of their society or hospitable to the standards their society expects

This is very true. Earlier today I was talking to someone when their phone rang: they abruptly stopped talking to me, answered the call, spoke for a minute or two then put their phone down and carried on with our conversation as if nothing had happened. I think it's incredibly rude, but it's just how phone calls are dealt with here, and I'm having to learn to deal with it. (Being English I'm very good at the inward seethe, of course!)

Yes, there is some truth in not offering a drink for a while = don’t want you here. But there’s generally an impression people do not want visitors or guests in their homes in the UK. It is a very introverted nation (which suits my temperament TBF). This was not directed at me personally, not at all. I spoke to H about it and he never noticed anything was off, to him it was normal and as expected. But it is a stark difference between Eastern/Western cultures.

We use points of reference we were socialised to use and it takes a while to amend those points of reference. After having lived in a few different cultures, you realise there are no impolite nations, nor inhospitable nations. They are polite according to the norms of their society or hospitable to the standards their society expects. It is no good judging other culture from the outside using alien to them points of reference. Completely useless exercise at best and erroneous at worst.