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Sharing the Shitness - HOF Advent Calendar SPOILERS

638 replies

Cheeseandcucumber · 02/12/2017 12:00

So it arrived damaged. Never mind, I thought, it's what's inside that counts...

OP posts:
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threehoursin · 20/12/2017 16:58

I love Ken's world domination tactics Xmas Grin I've nominated this thread for Classics.

ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 20/12/2017 16:44

ColourCature I don't think any of us can unsee your description of the mucousy bloody show now. Shock
I wonder if that's the description on the packaging? "A bold mucousy blood colour, perfect for a night out with the one you love" Grin

LemonShark · 20/12/2017 14:15

You're hilarious OP, I'm loving this thread! It's a daily delight to check in and see what you have been gifted with as I smugly open my beautiful NYX calendar and get loads of usage out of each item 😂😂😂

TracyBeakerSoYeah · 20/12/2017 12:53

Or maybe that's why the spider is dessicated, as the lip gloss is spider blood.
Omg there could be a warehouse full of desiccated dead spiders Xmas Shock

TracyBeakerSoYeah · 20/12/2017 12:52

Yuk yuk yuk looks like something's been murdered.............a mouse perhaps?
Eyes the Tabbies suspiciously Xmas Shock

ColourCature · 20/12/2017 12:44

Eew. It’s mucousy red coloured like a bloody show. 🤢

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 20/12/2017 11:27

Oh that would double-up very nicely as theatrical blood... Cheese, you'd have HOURS of fun sploding it here and there with one giant 'Splat' as a finale. Grin

clairethewitch70 · 20/12/2017 11:20

HOF diet lip gloss - glues your lips together so you can't eat Xmas Grin

Cheeseandcucumber · 20/12/2017 11:11

Xmas GrinXmas Grin We have a House of Funnel club with our very own theme tune.

Flash two funnels is outrageous. I bet even the Queen doesn't have TWO funnels.

Day 20 (can't believe we're on day 20!) brings us some more coloured glue. I swatched it on the door and within seconds it had gathered lots of dust so I may leave splodges of it around to aid with house cleaning. HOF are always thinking outside of the box with their gifts [santa]

Sharing the Shitness - HOF Advent Calendar SPOILERS
OP posts:
LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 19/12/2017 23:39

Everytime I'm seeing the word 'funnel' now I have that song, Funboy Three's "Tunnel of Love" in my head and I'm replacing 'Tunnel' with 'Funnel, of course...

neveradullmoment99 · 19/12/2017 22:59

None of the contents can be used with the funnel?
If you use the funnel for the glitter, where are you funnelling it too? Into the varnish? Am i missing something????

LizzieSiddal · 19/12/2017 22:19

This thread is bloody brilliant Xmas Grin

Mind you, that's the exact opposite of the contents of that calendar.

ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 19/12/2017 22:00

The House of Funnel Club sounds like a cool trendy nightclub in central London. So far removed from the HOF shitmas sadvent calendar. Grin

TracyBeakerSoYeah · 19/12/2017 21:41

We're all members of The House of Funnel Club Xmas Grin

FlashTheSloth · 19/12/2017 21:38

I got very excited on Sunday. I was having a tidy up of my bathroom cupboards, AND I CAME ACROSS A SMALL FUNNEL! Then DD was doing some sand art that she got from Father Christmas, it came with a tiny funnel. I now have 2! Neither are make up related though. The one in the bathroom came with a small, empty bottle set, where you decant from larger bottles.

TracyBeakerSoYeah · 19/12/2017 21:35

He's good at this modelling lark is Ken. He's certainly got a look of lion about him.
Misty says she thought we cats had taken over the world (but she likes the bit about the dead spider.......perhaps with a few crunched up mouse bones as final embellishment?) Xmas Grin

neveradullmoment99 · 19/12/2017 20:42

I don't get what the funnel is used for Confused
Enjoyed the video. I agree. Tacky junk!

LaughingLlama · 19/12/2017 20:00

I just cannot believe this is House of Fraser! What a load of tacky shite. Are you sure this is aimed at adults and not 7yo girls ? (although the funnel would still be a mystery!)

Did the HOF batch of advent calendars get mixed up with a batch meant for Poundland?Confused

Alicecooperslovechild · 19/12/2017 19:50

God my No7 Calendar seems even more dull now.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 19/12/2017 18:21

Oh. And a funnel. Just one. :)

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 19/12/2017 18:20

I would like a cat. That is all. :)

MrsPringles · 19/12/2017 14:55

That was amazing and now I know what delights the OP will be getting over the next few days

YOU’RE IN FOR A TREAT!

LemonShark · 19/12/2017 13:15

Here you go!

m.youtube.com/watch?v=YBzsKoJwRxA

Cheeseandcucumber · 19/12/2017 12:48

Those are bite marks in the paper, just to show he means business.

OP posts:
Cheeseandcucumber · 19/12/2017 12:47

Xmas Shock Misty is beautiful!

Ken has a message for her:

  1. Make human buy HOF calendar.
  2. Use funnel to pour glitter down human's throat.
  3. Seal human's mouth shut with glitter glue.
  4. Place dead spider on dead human - just cos I likes it, it's two of my favourite things.
  5. Use brush to dust away paw prints.
  6. Repeat to other humans until we have taken over the world.
Sharing the Shitness - HOF Advent Calendar SPOILERS
OP posts: