If teenagers were on AIBU

Omg !!! bigsandy

My mum like, plays that ALL. THE. TIME....so embarrassing to see her dancing like that !

coz like I'm just having a lovely sleep now........

I found this banging tune, called Insomnia, but every time I play it mum leaps around the kitchen with her hands in the air, thinking she's proper cool, cringe.

Reckons it reminds her of her clubbing days, yeah right, as if, I think she's chatting shit.

Get this right, so ya know I chatted about my old biddy yelling random numbers at me? Yeh, right well she's just stopped! An coz like I'm just having a lovely sleep now........

My Mum is such a bitch. I had a huge hole in the back of my tights and she actually told me so I could change them.

What an utter bitch. I screamed at her so that told her...

blackstar

My old bag of a mother has just said I can’t go to the snow dome with my mates next week because we have to go to her brother’s funeral. Yeah I know I was crying about him dying yesterday, but what the hell, a funeral v the snow dome!! She is soooooo selfish! I’ve got the school ski trip to Austria in February and I won’t be able to ski! Ughhhhh!!

I just wash up, right. I mean I did it all on my own and no one like asked me to do it, I just sort of did it cos there was like 6 plates and a few cups, and now I am stood here waiting, for Mum to notice and thank me for being so wonderful and helpful and I am like so blooming amazing.....

So, like, my dad is all "you're not wearing that" and I goes him "I so am biatch"and he gets that look so I go out but when I get back with Jo and Sam and Loz and Hayley he's wearing that t-shirt doesn't fit with the vomiting warthog and he's playing deathmetal and he's spilled something on his shorts and I could just die and mi posse all are all "ooh Mr. Disgrace can you make us those nachos" and I wanna DIE.

Ffs, the mother went to fat class tonight and didn’t make me tea as I said I would be home at 6 and Mac cheese needs to be made fresh. It wasn’t my fault I was home at 6.25pm as the blinking personal statement for UCAS was a pain.

The father said at 6.40pm he was off to pick her up. But at 6.54pm she still hadn’t come out and I needed to be at my waxing appointment. How come she can be late and I can’t. I don’t care if it was the fat class’s Christmas night!

So like Katie has ftimed me tonight to do a sleepover on Friday at her house. Mum is going mental cos she says she's never even heard of Katie and she is like my BFF forever (this week!!) and it's so unfair. Who cares if no one knows where Katie lives and her mum hasn't even said if I can come. My life is OVER it's so unfair!!!!

So funny about the eyebrows!!! Xxx

Anyone else have one who just hates you for existing? I have one of those.

'TO DO MY HAIR AND EYEBROWS' You have just left me in hysterics.

So I’m going on a Geography field trip tomorrow and she’s going on about wearing a fucking coat. Then she starts on about her manky hiking boots and she goes and gets them out to show me. I was like Mum seriously I cannot believe you are stressing me out like this. I have planned my outfit for weeks and obvs I am wearing my skinny ripped jeans, crop top and huaraches and I am getting up early to do my hair and eyebrows. Don’t even go there about the packed lunch - lunch boxes are just so extra.

Why the fuck does my mother insist on turning the car radio up and singing so fucking loudly to either Katy Perry or Arianna Grande?
She even does it in the school car park. So embarrassing.
I might take the bus if she gives me the money obvs.

I keep telling her she is old and it's just not right.

I'm getting the next flight home... she's just asked for a fucking sex on the beach & winked at the fit barman how fucking embarrassing can she be???

PMSL at the Aladdin trousers. Was considering buying them myself!

So she's decided that we're going out to a family night shitty thing when I totally wanted to go on the bar crawl with the hotel entertainment team cause Jay is well fit like & he told me I was beautiful at the pool today but she's trotting out this "you're only 17" shite again FFS I'll be 18 in like a month February so now I'll be sat in the family pub with bitchface & my sister (bitchface jnr) & it'll be soooo fucking embarrassing cause I bet the complete cockwomble gets up to sing karaoke & she sounds like a fucking cat being strangled!

& she's like wearing fucking trousers that Aladdin wears... fucking Aladdin... obvs I don't get my style from her cause I'm like rocking a flowery playsuit with a cord skirt over it but she keeps trying to put my top button in cause apparently I'm "flashing everything you've got which isn't much" yeah alright at least my boobs are where they should be not hanging round my belly button like her spaniels ears...

Fucking crying at this thread one of the funniest for a while lmfao.

FFS my stupid mom is the most embarrassing thing I've ever seen. I mean like, WTF?

I had to plead with her this morning to ask her to pick me up from school and she was like "I'm not sure bab, I've got your little brother to pick up first, but I'll text you and let you know" She then texts me and tells me she will pick me up, so I ask her not to park right outside school ( she's got the shitty family ford vignale kuga, as my dad has the best one for his work) I'm not being seen getting in that fucking monstrosity and she's like " ok sweetheart, I'll park round one of the back side roads"

AND THERE SHE FUCKING WELL IS, ENT SHE? standing on the corner of the road like a prostitute "rocking" her skinny jeans and converse (she looks like a fucking idiot, she's well past it, old haggard 32 year old) fucking waving at me, Waving at me?? why the hell is she waving at me? I. can. see. her.
So I stormed over to her and was like "mom, why the hell are you waiting for me here, I said I'd walk to your car, are you becoming senile or something, do you not remember???" And she was all like "sorry bab, I was parked all the way around there and didn't think you'd find me, I wasn't directly outside your school though, love"

yeah alright mom, not outside my school but directly in the path of me and my mates waving at me, like really?? My phone has gps, send me your co-ordinates and I'll find you. Fuck! Is she a complete dickhead or what??

AIBU my stupid mother thinks I should consider the debating club. It's on at the same time as hockey. The evil one actually wants me to consider the debating club. I have never hit a ball at hockey but the cow just doesn't care about me and I could be really good at hockey. She is considering talking to the school about moving debating to a different time so I could attend. How fucking embarrassing. The only debate I want to engage in is how to stop the evil one interfering in my life.

Then she goes on and on and on about my subject choices and whether I prefer German or Spanish. I've like told her I prefer Spanish but she like asks EVERY fucking day whether I still prefer Spanish. I haven't even trialed French yet and she's already TELLING me that I'll love it. Thinking of choosing German to annoy the bitch. At least she doesn't speak it so can't annoy me with Wie gehts every fucking day like seriously. Tries to speak Spanish to me. I'm ashamed for her.

Plus she only got me one month of data for my phone. Told me I've to spend my pocket money on data 'in the future'. She loves that 'in the future' shit. In da future I won't have enough credit or data to contact the stupid cow. She'll buy it for me then so she can continue to stalk me. She thinks she's so clever. She hasn't a clue about anything.