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To clap my hands and skip about in a elephantine manner?

589 replies

DisgraceToTheYChromosome · 15/06/2017 23:11

I'm going to be a grandfather! Woo hoo! They haven't tuppence to rub together, so there'll be 3 generations under one roof. Still, DD is doing well after the throwing stopped, he's working all the hours God sends, and with luck I shall see New Person into their teens, as opposed to my DF who got less than 7 years of DGF hood. Wish us luck.

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OVienna · 24/12/2019 21:41

Lovely grandson. What a wonderful thread!

DisgraceToTheYChromosome · 27/11/2019 11:39

Quarterly update. The Terrible Twos have kicked in, and theatrical strops over the tiniest thing are now routine. However, he's still essentially good hearted. Yesterday he had to be quiet as I was on nights. He managed it until he heard my alarm go off, and then came upstairs and patted* me. "You wake now?"
"Yes darling"
"Yay! Watch Sam, shout at Norman!"

*Half a dozen blows from a balloon.

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StudentHelp · 21/09/2019 01:19

He’s gorgeous!

DisgraceToTheYChromosome · 27/08/2019 18:41

However, some of his qualities are getting him into trouble. What will happen if I put mummy's electric toothbrush into the microwave? Will this wasp be my friend? Can I lick this dog?
Also when playing skittles, the ball is NOT thrown at your opponents.

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DisgraceToTheYChromosome · 27/08/2019 18:30

A stylish young gentleman. He kept that shirt clean for nearly 3 hours as well, not bad considering his consumption of wotsits.

To clap my hands and skip about in a elephantine manner?
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DisgraceToTheYChromosome · 27/08/2019 18:27

Second birthday. Ever more good looking, funnier and lunatic. Here's him and DW rolling down the ditch at Alnwick.

To clap my hands and skip about in a elephantine manner?
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ChaosMoon · 17/08/2019 08:17

Ah, Disgrace I've only just found your thread and it's beautiful. Makes me wish, once again, my own DF could have met DD. I'm confident that he'd have been the world's best GF but under the circumstances, that's an accolade you can claim. Congratulations on your fabulous life.

DisgraceToTheYChromosome · 15/08/2019 23:13

Top pointing skills in evidence. The planter is ⅔ of our horticulture, another thing I'm glad of. Our ld garden grew nothing but grass, catshit, and hydrogen sulphide, so I spent every summer sweating like a pig and trying not to vomit.

To clap my hands and skip about in a elephantine manner?
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DisgraceToTheYChromosome · 27/07/2019 17:52

Very Nearly Two. Right now, I'm orange from nostril to navel, because lasagne. I have run my dgps off their feet, hidden my clothes so I don't have to go home, and "helped" decorate a cake. The sprinkles should turn up eventually.

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DisgraceToTheYChromosome · 22/07/2019 23:27

encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQEHXWrGA7hn6EI1mvc5-K7dmeT4Tv0TTMBIPAYbtBQVvnerw1H

This is not his splint. His splint is even more garish. God help us, I'd hoped we could get him to pre-school before this particular tradition kicked in. Nope.

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DisgraceToTheYChromosome · 08/07/2019 11:10

Yeah, that'll be fun for his teachers. However, rather more concerning is his ability to knock lumps out himself. Since Friday he has been hit by a swing, clonked by a roundabout rail, fallen off a chair onto a tiled floor, and rolled down a grass bank. This morning he tried to jump down the stairs.

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Weezol · 07/07/2019 11:12

Maybe stop posting photos when he's two, but please consider continuing to update us - I enjoy your writing style immensely.

I just really want to be a fly on the wall when he arrives in education with his lavishly and strangely furnished mind courtesy of Pop Disgrace.

DisgraceToTheYChromosome · 01/07/2019 20:34

He got us to Northumberland anyway, I owe them big time for that. So many bonuses, among which is never having to the Dartford Crossing ever again.

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BoreOfWhabylon · 01/07/2019 20:30

Wise decision, although it's been lovely to watch!

DisgraceToTheYChromosome · 01/07/2019 20:28

Hi Bore. Second birthday approaching!
I think that's the point at which I'll stop posting on here. The commonplaces of childhood are dull if you're not directly involved. He'll go on to astonish and alarm, but at some point privacy should and must cloak him. Apart from anything else, he'll probably be on the web at some point. Doesn't need an overfond old git embarrassing him.

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BoreOfWhabylon · 01/07/2019 20:16

Oh, I'd lost track of this glorious thread!

How time flies Disgrace! He just gets more and more gorgeous doesn't he?

I hope you are keeping to your pledge of the strange and lavish mind-furnishings Grin

DisgraceToTheYChromosome · 01/07/2019 17:43

They are my reward, all of them together, but DGS especially. I'm so glad I resisted the temptations earlier in life to fuck things up beyond repair.

I popped round earlier today, and he climbed onto my lap, sat there for about a minute, and climbed off. Ever had heroin? I have, post-op. MUCH better.

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notatwork · 01/07/2019 16:37

Such a little rumpus! He looks a bundle of fun. So glad that you are enjoying him so much Disgrace.

DisgraceToTheYChromosome · 01/07/2019 09:23

Today we are modelling bright yellow vinyl and will shortly be setting it off with a light coating of soot. One of the beauties of the Northeast is the number of steam railways, just the the thing for little boys of all ages.

To clap my hands and skip about in a elephantine manner?
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SaltedCaramelEverything · 29/06/2019 23:06

Amazing thread. And the kid has developed an amazing fashion sense too - what a cutie!

TurquoiseAndPurple · 28/06/2019 20:19

Awwh how lovely 😊❤️ @DisgraceToTheYChromosome

DisgraceToTheYChromosome · 27/06/2019 23:55

22 months, and he's beginning to be intelligible. He informs us hourly that "I big boy, you get me dog/leave me alone in house/give more chocolate". When his parents demur, he gets his little backpack and bangs on the front door shouting "I go nanna now". His cunning is increasing: he found the chocolate buttons by smell, took the bag to DD and said "Pop-pop said four". A) he told a believable lie B) he showed more restraint than I would have C) he waited until I was out of the room.
Still utterly adorable though.

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DisgraceToTheYChromosome · 31/05/2019 20:19

Thank you TurquoiseAndPurple. It started as a throwaway line 2 years and then took on a life of its own. I'm doing all the stuff with him that I missed while DD was this age. Back then, I worked 65-70 hour weeks or we didn't eat. Now, we've got the time to thoroughly enjoy ourselves. He's also a new experience, as it's been over 50 years since I've had anything to do with a little boy. DGS is an entertainment: fizzing with energy, brimming with joy, and full of quirky humour.

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TurquoiseAndPurple · 29/05/2019 19:02

Only just found this thread! What a delight😍

DisgraceToTheYChromosome · 27/05/2019 10:04

21 months. Here's a picture of him at the beach. At this point DW and I had been chasing him and his ball for about 90 minutes. @HavelockVetinari: I have to admit that großvaterfreude is very satisfying emotion. DGS is much more immediate than his mother was. Everything is a source of ecstasy or dreadful woe. The first involves thrillseeking to make our hair turn greyer, the latter can be stopped by putting something in his mouth. He's also trying dishonesty out. He's not very good at it yet, which is hilarious. DD and DSIL are better parents than we were tbh.

To clap my hands and skip about in a elephantine manner?
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