Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Mumsnet classics

Relive the funniest, most unforgettable threads. For a daily dose of Mumsnet’s best bits, sign up for Mumsnet's daily newsletter.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

WORST sex dream EVER! I will NEVER sleep again!

256 replies

MumBod · 06/06/2017 07:48

Donald Trump!

What the fuck, mind?

Why?

Can I get a brain transplant for this on the NHS?

Fucking hell...he kissed the back of my neck and groped my boobs and...

Oh god

OP posts:
Thread gallery
10
EllebellyBeeblebrox · 07/06/2017 06:09

Oh my god I was considering posting about my sex dream last night, it was the Rock/Dwayne Johnson and it was amazing.
I am only now realising though that this might relate to me having watched Moana yesterday and that this might make me a disgusting weirdo.

LittleMouseontheDairy · 07/06/2017 06:07

So,op... how was last night?

Did he revisit you? And, ahem, show you Trump Tower?
Did you ride the golden elevator shaft?

TheFreaksShallInheritTheEarth · 06/06/2017 23:52

Thanks for this thread MumBod it's hilarious. I especially liked DLT and his quack quack oops (I'm old too).

Most of sex dreams have been pretty dull: had one about Hugh Laurie when I was 18 and fell in love with him. 30 years later, I still love him.

Also, one with my daughter's Spanish teacher. It was parents' evening a couple of days later. I was red faced,shaking and spluttering at our meeting because of the things he did to me a couple of nights before! And there he was, acting all normal!
Also had one about a female work colleague. Bleurgh!

DistanceCall · 06/06/2017 23:50

Adele. I had a penis. (I'm a heterosexual cisgender woman).

It was... disconcerting.

AlexaAmbidextra · 06/06/2017 23:26

I once had John Major. I quite enjoyed it as I recall. Edwina will back me up I'm sure. Grin

ChestnutsRoastingOnAnOpenFire · 06/06/2017 22:58

Don't worry op, I had Alan Titchmarsh several times one night. Took months to get rid of the soft spot I developed for him. Must have been Stockholm syndrome.

Funko · 06/06/2017 22:58

Bigly

Funko · 06/06/2017 22:56

Give us a kiss op

WORST sex dream EVER! I will NEVER sleep again!
TheBusThatCouldntSlowDown · 06/06/2017 22:44

TheIncredible Putin is an absolute animal in the sack so you're sure to have a great time. He gave me a dream sexing so good that I'm not even ashamed.

PamDooveOrangeJoof · 06/06/2017 22:30

Emmageddon - I had a few dreams about Chris Evans and also found them traumatising. I'm sure I was actually crying when I woke up as thought it had really happened 😂

Original poster
MumBod · 06/06/2017 22:27

Must...stay...awake...

WORST sex dream EVER! I will NEVER sleep again!
OP posts:
Pollydonia · 06/06/2017 22:21

Mumbod I would like to sincerely thank you and your overies for getting through the most boring training session ever, as I chewed on my cheek to stop the laughing. Flowers

TheIncredibleBookEatingManchot · 06/06/2017 22:20

Doomed to a night of Trump, Putin and Mr Tumble because of this thread that is. That is not a place my mind went to of its own volition.

TheFaerieQueene · 06/06/2017 22:18

Was that the sound of the headboard in your dream last night? Grin

Original poster
MumBod · 06/06/2017 22:14
Wink
OP posts:
Original poster
MumBod · 06/06/2017 22:14

Well, I am now, Funko

Angry
OP posts:
Mermaidinthesea123 · 06/06/2017 22:11

yeah you can get a mind wipe for that on the NHS no probs

TheIncredibleBookEatingManchot · 06/06/2017 22:10

I was finding this thread so amusing to read till pomonasprout came along and said you dream about what you were thinking about 2 - 3 hours before you go to sleep.

I am doomed to a night of Trump, Putin and Mr Tumble.

Funko · 06/06/2017 22:08

But are you now just thinking of banging Donald Trump ?

Original poster
MumBod · 06/06/2017 21:47
OP posts:
FlaviaAlbia · 06/06/2017 21:35
Grin
LoupGarou · 06/06/2017 21:30

Adds a whole new aspect to "the nights are dark and full of terrors" doesn't it? Grin

Original poster
MumBod · 06/06/2017 21:23
OP posts:
HarryBlackberry · 06/06/2017 21:21

I had John Major once. Years ago. Never forgot it. Made me physically ill.

FlaviaAlbia · 06/06/2017 21:18

You know the thing where if you need to wake up at a certain time you bang your head off the pillow 6 times to get up at 6?

And yes, I know it sounds bizarre, I read it in a childrens book...

Try banging your head off the pillow a few times while thinking of an acceptable alternative. It probably won't hurt WinkGrin