Can you beat my colleague's mistake?

My (then) little daughter was going to the shops with her grandad when I was cooking dinner and I asked them to get me some fresh garlic.

They came back and proudly placed one onion on the worktop!

That's brilliant! How could the DH not have questioned it?! That's a lot of bread!

When I was a student nurse I was carrying a bowl of warm water to a patient so that he could wash and shave in bed. I slipped and threw the lot over him. When his wife found out she put in a formal complaint but he and the other three men in that bay thought it was hilarious.

I still can't believe that I did this but I actually walked into a waiting room and called out for Miss Take. I was very stressed that day and had just glanced at the post it note stuck to the front of the notes which happened to be over the name.

Only a few months ago I spotted a bargain pair of bootie slippers on sale online in Studio. I ordered a size 7. There was also a 'S' on the form and I couldn't figure out what it meant so just left it thinking it was their code or something.
Yup, 'S' actually stood for small as I found out when 7 pairs of booties turned up all at once!

These are all funny but I loved this

My first job was in a restaurant in a pub
One night we had no customers
At locking up time I found out that I didn't need to lock up as I had never unlocked the door in the first place

I have payment disasters too! I may have made electronic payments in Swiss Francs instead of French ones (years ago, obvs) which may have been worth about three times as much!

I may also have sent money to Belgium instead of France, just by looking at the address and thinking "that sounds like being in Belgium" rather than actually checking.

I may also have got the MD's pay wrong, and deducted £1000s extra tax

not all these errors in the same job mind, and I'm better these days

My colleague accidently printed the whole staff handbook - all 2000 pages of it - when what she wanted was a print out of a protocol which was on a single page.
It was the day after we'd all had the memo about cutting printing and photocopying costs.

When dh was a student he was with a theatre group doing The Importance of being Ernest.

They sent props out at the last minutes for the muffins Ernest and Algy eat for tea.
Props was American.
Yes, she returned with chocolate muffins.

At my old law firm I sent an email with an attached document to print... Only it turns out there were about 15 documents attached to the email which I'd have known if only I'd scrolled down. I was asking for quite a few copies... I wanted to die when I had to go into the partner's office and confess that I'd accidentally had £42,000 worth of photocopying done. Luckily he saw the funny side...

PMSL at the raspberry coulis on the white dog.

I just this minute got an email telling me I had made an electronic payment of $229,800 and she couldn't stop it from her end! When I called the bank to stop it, they told me not to worry as there was no way they'd pay it. I'll pay more attention to decimal points in future.

My friends work organised a small lunchtime Christmas lunch, with everyone bringing something. She was asked to bring the crackers. Turned up with a tub of Jacobs crackers for cheese. It was Christmas crackers for the table that they were after!

I think we should have a whole board for tannoy disasters. Once, whilst temping, I may have turned to my switchboard, which was ringing on about eight lines, and said flip fuck it, which may have echoed around a whole factory employing 1000 people.

I may have had a call from HR asking "is everything ok"

I sent DP out with a list and he came back with a leek (asked for spring onions), olives (asked for olive oil) and double cream (instead of blue top whole milk). He's slowly improving. When I worked in retail and popping out to get lunch, a colleague asked me to pick him up a sausage roll, I misheard and came back with a pack of 6 rolls.

Oh I love the pink dog!

You guessed it........my dad proudly gave me 3 packets of Jacobs crackers, very pleased with himself that they had made it without being crumbled

I had another one of these. That was a sad Christmas, the year our American friend showed up with a packet of Carr's thinking he'd brought along exactly what we asked him to .

Love this thread!

I was working as an outside caterer in a particularly swanky house when I dropped a huge pot of raspberry coulis all over their pure white, thick-coated show dog. I frantically tried to clean the coulis off, only making the dog more and more sticky and a beautiful shade of pink.

I sent ex DH out for shopping with list - in amongst all the fruit and veg I wrote Baking pots. It was the days before mobile phones were common place...he came back with bun cases from the baking dept... I then asked him if we were having cake for tea then...having discussed menus with him before writing said list...in one ear out t'other

nosquirrels that really made me laugh.
A colleague accidentally ordered 82 cases of wine instead of 2 boxes of 8. He got so frustrated at the delivery drivers and knowing he'd get a right bollocking kicked a box, which promptly collapsed toppling two stacks of ten boxes. We watched the cctv footage on loop after every shit shift.

Not me but a military colleague ordered 1000 India tags - not realising they came in bags of 1000, so we had a million India tags...

Why Stores didn't phone and query the requisition I don't know!

Biggest mistake was a colleague who was the purchasing manager in a factory. He bought £300k worth of an expensive steel alloy to manufacture components for a new contract/project. Unfortunately, he mis-read the contract/project documents and bought the wrong stuff. As it was specially ordered from the rolling mill, it couldn't be returned, and as it was the wrong stuff, it couldn't be used for anything else. Worse still the stuff they really needed cost £500k, and they'd used the £300k figure when they costed the contract, so not only did they lose the £300k on stuff they didn't need, they also lost money on the contract itself. Needless to say, he didn't work there for long after that!

Ah I have made tonnes of mistakes at work but nothing this funny sadly

However my sister once met a quite famous actor and told him how much she had loved his performance in a popular tv show. He looked at her like this . She'd confused him with another actor.

They don't even look similar

My husband has made silly mistakes like this twice.

First one not work related, but for our wedding I asked him to go to the post office and buy the stamps for the invitations. He bought a stamp for each guest instead! 102 stamps for 58 envelopes...

He was also asked to buy earplugs for his department at work. He thought he was buying 1000 individual ear plugs, so 500 pairs. No. He bought 1000 pairs. 2000 individual ear plugs.