Banged my head on a shop window.

Oh and I once cracked my coccyx falling down a flight of steps

I was trying to exit a train once, in Glasgow. I was used to trains with buttons to press to open the doors, but this door had none. I started to get that panicky feeling of being trapped but I realised that I had to open the window, put my arm out, and open the door by the outside handle.

I reached my arm out and flailed around wildly for the handle, to no avail. I was really panicking now and I stuck my head out of the little window, stepping on the bottom of the door to get a bit of lift. I saw the handle, grasped it and tugged, and to my great relief, the door opened.

Unfortunately, my relief was short lived as I was now standing on a rapidly opening door, with my head and arm sticking out of the window, with nothing to stop me except the side of the train.

The door, my giant backpack and I described, as one, a perfect arc through the air and thudded, with a shriek, into the carriage wall. I just about managed to extract my head in time and ended up nose-to-metal with the train.

Then it was a simple matter of hopping down from the door and styling it out all the way down the platform. Except the episode gave me a fit of the giggles and even those who had not seen my beautiful descent were treated to a red faced me, cry-giggling, and snotting her way to the taxi rank.

These are so funny.

I was home alone and planing down the side of DSs room's door that kept getting stuck and thought I had it fixed so I stupidly closed it from inside his room only to realise that it was stuck.

When it sticks you can only open it from the outside by throwing your weight against it and pushing. No amount of pulling was going to open it. So I had to sit at the window and wait for a neighbour with a key to come out. I did yell a few times but felt awkward as there are lots of people about that I don't know. Finally my neighbour left to walk her dog and she came and "saved" me.

Fanny!! Didn't see yours babies I posted. That's hilarious!

On one of my first dates with dp, I smacked my head on the window of an Indian restaurant.....table for two, quite empty restaurant as it was early.....I was trying to look out of it and misjudged it! Couldn't stop laughing for ages.

These stories are actually making me cry laughing! 3 yo dd just asked me what I'm laughing at!

My ex bought me a full length wool coat for winter.
There is a reason I didn't already have one.

Christmas shoppers in York, going about their festive business.
Me, new coat, feeling like I'm in a sleeping bag, fidgety and fussy.

Got to the top of the hill, tripped up, got tangled up in the shitty coat, fell over and rolled down the cobbled pavement like a huge indiana Jones boulder.
I actually knocked two other people over.

The streets were heaving and I just rolled.

I'm actually crying with laughter reading this thread. I'm so glad I'm not the only klutz

I was once walking out Liverpool Street station and there are those funny steps in front. So basically, I was checking bus times on my phone and managed to sprain my ankle going down the steps. I stood up, tried to walk off with dignity. Most of the people could barely hold their sniggering while I left, but I ended up on crutches for quite a few weeks

I've done exactly what you did, OP, and got a very sore nose from it! Thankfully it was quite early on a Sunday, so DH was the only one to see it. To his credit, he did TRY not to laugh.

Recently I was on the bus, with DS2 in his buggy. I was sitting on one of the fold down seats in the disabled space. DS dropped a toy, so I leant forward to pick it up and give it back to him. Unfortunately I forgot that my seat would pop itself away when I took my weight off it, so when I leant back to sit back down, I simply slid down the side of the bus onto the floor quite a few people were trying to hide their amusement at first, but when I laughed out loud, they joined in! Even I could see that it was bloody funny

I am well known in my family for getting locked in public toilets. The most recent was in an hotel in Tenerife. We were going for a meal and I popped to the toilets by the restaurant. The lock was broken and I couldn't get out. Luckily I had my mobile on me and I called my friend who got a waiter to come and release me. "This has happened to lots of people." (Why the hell didn't they fix it then? ) I caught the waiter laughing at me but unfortunately for him I speak Spanish so I gave him a death stare and had no more trouble!

Tripped over a kerb while crossing the road. Unfortunately it was a pedestrian crossing at rush hour and there were four queues of traffic not to mention the school kids at the bus stop

I love the stories of rearing up like an ape and entering the restaurant via the window. I'm going to have to stop reading now though as I'm trying and failing to do so sneakily at work.

I used to work at a base with the Royal Marines, I used to be quite fit at the time and went to the gym every lunch time with my friend. One day we were having a chat whilst on the running machine and as I was trying to run whilst looking at her I drifted over to the side and caught the outside edge of my trainer on the edge of the belt/bit that doesn't move.

This didn't immediately throw me to the ground (unfortunately) just knocked me off balance so for a few terrible seconds I instinctively flailed wildly trying to keep my balance before gravity won and I crashed down on to the belt and was fired off the end.

I tripped up the kerb rushing from the tube to work and fell right in front of a gorgeous man - on my knees with my head right in his crotch. I'm not sure which of us was more embarrassed! He did help me up and I ran away, despite the fact that both knees were badly grazed and bruised and very painful .

(Loving this thread.)

I laughed out loud and accidently farted on a train reading about entering restaurant via window! perfumeandcatabdbooks!

I must look deranged. I'm sitting in the car outside school waiting for the kids in tears. I haven't belly laughed like this in so long. Thank you all so much

Years and years ago when i was 15, I was in Spain on an exchange trip! We were in a shop that was in a split level it had a quite wide spiral staircase in the middle of the shop, I mis-stepped and fell down the stairs in quite a dramatic manor I looked up to find several ladies trying to help me up all speaking Spanish which I did not understand! I was very embarrassed!!

crying with laughter!

Sitting at desk right now trying to contain my laughter and crying slightly. It is lunch time but still.

My own:

At the gym. On a treadmill. Headphones on. Totally in the zone. Tripped and fell. If this happens to you, do nothing, the treadmill will just spit you out the back. Don't do what I did and try to get up and keep running, stumbling on your knees several times until the guy on the next machine stops running to sort me out. The running track of the treadmill had a gritty surface so it was like kneeling on a belt sander. I tried to continue with the workout(!?) before realizing I had blood streaming down my legs. It took weeks to heal and longer for me to go back to the gym.

Just remembered one of my mum's. We were on holiday in Eastern Finland and mum decided to visit a public smoke sauna. She went in to the changing room, undressed, and walked into the sauna naked as is usually done in saunas in Finland except this sauna happened to be a unisex one so people were required to wrap towels around themselves or wear a swimming costume, but mum just walked in starkers in front of a big sauna full of people

Oh God, I've just remembered one of mine.

In the swimming pool there is a locker with quite a stiff door. It was one of the only free ones so I steadied myself on the adjacent locker with my left hand and wrenched open the door with my right.

Only of course it wasn't that locker, it was one with a perfectly normal door, so it flew open like it'd been blown up, I rocketed back to stop it taking my nose off, and it ricocheted all the way around and walloped the back of my left hand. I bellowed like a buffalo and hopped around clutching my hand between my thighs, then looked up to see thirty or so families all watching me in silence, and walked out to the pool muttering to myself.

Because of the layout of the changing rooms they'd all seen me squaring up to this locker, planting my feet like a wrestler and resting against it, just to open a very small very ordinary door. They all just sat there politely watching the whole performance in silent confusion

Not me but my DH. We were just getting up after watching a film with half a bucket of popcorn left and DH managed to accidentally tip it all over the guys head in front who was still sat down. All in his hair down his top. DH just stood there mortified continuously apologising. The guy took it like a trooper laughed shook him myself off and said don't worry about it.

I walked into a mirror in a nightclub once, and hurt my wrist, trying to greet myself as I saw my reflection and thought "She looks a bit familiar but I can't quite work out who she is. I'd best say hello so she doesn't think I've blanked her". Luckily it was at the bottom of a few steps and I was in really high heels so it just looked like I'd tripped over the step.

thought vaguely that it was odd I then had to make my way over a fairly tall display of plants. I had in fact just entered the restaurant through the window

^^I have a cough and just did a proper Muttley laugh at this