Banged my head on a shop window.

Ricks am proper crying at that!!

Many years ago I was out shopping. It was a lovely sunny day and I was wearing a long summer dress. For whatever reason I had decided to not wear any pants (in my twenties I liked to be daring and cheeky - these days I prefer warmth & security ). All of a sudden the heavens just opened so I ran full pelt to the nearest shop (Woolworths). Unfortunately a polished floor and wet sandals are not compatible and I went arse over tit. I slid like a torpedo for what seemed like a mile until my momentum was stopped by the Easter egg display. Unfortunately as I slid my dress was hoiked up over my waist. So there I lay on the floor, head & shoulders buried by Cadbury's finest with my bare arse displayed for all to see!!! Quite a few people came to help me up. I have never ever since ran from the rain - I'll just get soaked thank-you

I once went up in a lift, got to the floor I wanted and the door didn't open. It went back down to ground floor, irritated I pressed the button again. Exactly the same happened.

On the third trip I happened to look over my shoulder and realise it was one of those lifts where the opposite doors open to let you out. By the time I realised, I was on my way back down. I had clocked a waiting room full of people staring at me

So I took my jacket off and walked up the stairs....

D's did this the other day the glass shook we squealed he was not concerned

Pretty sure he gets it off me though I was running down a street in London and ran full pelt into the side of a car

I've also crouched down on the bus and gone flying backwards when it drove off I ended up slap on my arse in the gangway

I have done the jewellery window headbutt.

I also walked into the school office to pay for 'something'. Promptly forgot what the hell I was paying for and ended up playing some warped version of 20 questions with the new receptionist who was looking at me like 'should you be out by yourself'.

Once we established I wanted to pay for the school pantomime I then completely forgot my children's years and classes and muddled their names.

Luckily she was a temp and I haven't seen her since

*Neatly not nearly

Away for a weekend with DH a few years ago. The hotel in which we were staying had evening entertainment so we were having a few drinks while watching it. I had a headache so decided to have an early night, DH said he'd be up in a bit after the show had finished.
When I woke later there was no sign of DH. Texted him, and while waiting for a reply discovered via Facebook that he was in the casino over the road, much to my annoyance. I was feeling a lot better after my nap so I got dressed and went to find him. Couldn't see him so I ordered a drink and texted him to let him know where I was sitting. By the time he eventually joined me I was furious with him for going out instead of coming to bed, being there so late, being in a poker game, etc. I had just finished giving him a piece of my mind, was ready to leave storm off in a huff and slammed my drink down on what I thought was a table, it turned out to be a flip lid bin, which nearly swallowed my drink! At this point I realised there was a waitress standing at my side who, with a straight face and perfect comedy timing, asked politely if I'd like another drink!

Climbing through the window into a restaurant is making me howl!! It's just brilliant!

Just remembered more when I was a teenager and running for school bus I ran through wet cement god knows how I ran past traffic cones that were there to protext cement I had to go home and change my shoes footprints still there to this day lol another myself and Dh on honeymoon decided to go scuba diving there were 2 other men going out with us so the men jumped into dinghy no bother I jumped in then went flat on my face from the weight of the scuba gear on my back the instructor was a very serious looking German kept asking was I ok couldn't stop laughing everything I looked at him.

I work in a jewellery shop. Ppl do this on average six times a day! I guess we keep our glass really clean. Don't worry, we've seen it many times. Hope you are ok

A few years ago I was arranging my car insurance with a new company and had spoken several times over the phone with 'Christos' who had a lovely Greek accent. As it transpired his office was a two-minute walk from my office so he suggested I called in the following day to collect my policy.

I donned my slinkiest just-over-the-knee-cleavage-showing dress and a pair of shag me wedges and strolled down the street. As I found his office I went arse over tit on the pavement, busted both knees and nearly broke an ankle. Stumbled into the office bleeding and dazed and announced to a tiny bespectacled bald man I was looking for 'Christos'. Little 60-something year old man said 'I am Christos!'

FFS I still bear the scars from trying to impress a Danny DeVito lookalike

I've just remembered another awful moment - was at a conference a while ago, and at the wine reception afterwards I was talking to a guy I know, who is very painfully shy. He asked if I knew where the gents were and I thought he might be uncomfortable asking a stranger so I said "sorry, I don't but let me ask someone", walked up to a clump of male academics and asked in a ringing voice, "Do you know where the gents' loos are? I'm asking for a friend"

Which of course is what you say to imply you're not asking for a friend at all, so it looked like I'd just marched up to them and blared out a weird smutty joke that barely even made sense, then just froze and shuffled off again

ImNotReallyReal - And they didn't try to blame YOU for the incident?! This reminded me of something that happened a few years ago in a Wilkinson's store. A woman walked past a display of table lamps and knocked one of them with her enormous handbag. It toppled and knocked the one next to it crashing to the floor,breaking into dozens of pieces. She just breezed off,leaving me and DD standing nearby,looking shocked. The security guard came hurrying over and started blaming us! He couldn't seem to believe that someone would do something like that then just walk off,so assumed it was us that had done it!

I managed to cycle at full pelt into a half barrier across a footpath. It was broad daylight, I'd cycled along there a million times before and the barrier was six inches thick and painted bright yellow.

There were quite a few people around to watch me hurtle into it and flounder in mid-air for a second before crumpling to the ground.

Im stupid

A few weeks ago I was going to a shopping centre there's one of those moving walkways up to shopping level early so not many around I only went walking up on the one coming down almost fell over morto I think 2 people saw!

I was on holiday in Spain with my parents and sister when I was about 16. We were staying in our friends apartment where most people ate Spanish. We went down to the pool with our loungers. Everyone settled down and I decided to recline my deckchair. It reclined so far back that it tipped upside down and i was sat there with my head on the floor and my feet in the air completely upside down. My family were too busy laughing to help me up and the lifeguard came running and shouting from the other side of the pool to help me. I tried to explain what had happened but he didn't speak a word of English and kind of rolled me out of the chair. I was mortified but crying with laughter.

QuimReaper I am crying here!!! bellowed like a buffalo, I did this same sort of thing yesterday, getting something out of the cupboard that was stuck ynked really hard and smashed my hand inbetween the door and shelf was effing and blinding after howling like a wolf, then was hopping round the room just like you.... god I can't breathe through laughing right now

FannyWisdom oh dear lord, your post had me roaring with laughter, my belly hurts from it!! I got an image in my head straight away god that was funny

"Well, they had to keep them somewhere..."

Absolutely howling now..

Oh and no injury but we used to prop the window open at work with a box.

I was trying to open the window to release the box (without actually supporting said box) and it fell out the window and nearly hit someone

Reading this thread aloud to DH and tears are dripping off my chin!

I say to DH: "I think I've found my people!" His reply? "Well, they had to keep them somewhere..."

Just this week I fell down the stairs in a shopping centre, literally clattering my way down and spilling the contents of my bags everywhere. A very sweet teenage boy handed my my box of tampons back, glowing like a sunburned tomato. I accepted and collected myself, only to walk into the window next to the automatic door immediately afterwards

When I was 15 I was going to town on the bus, no seats so standing in the aisle at the front. Bus sharply turned a corner and I lost my balance on my stupidly high heeled boots and just fell over. I was lying on my side on the bus floor and I didn't know what to do. So I just lay there. I wondered if I could play dead. I just lay there until a very old man grabbed me and picked me up.

It was so dreadful, but like others here I am incredibly clumsy and the humiliation just goes on and on

Couple of years back I went to town and got my hair cut. Didn't really realise until I started to get off the chair that I had odd trainers on but in my defense the were both with with pink on the side... Only one was Nike tick and one was Adidas stripes

I love these, I think the ones where the ops end up laughing themselves are great