What naice things do you make sure are visible to visitors

'Ordinary' guests don't get any special naiceties, but when the vicar came to tea to discuss DD's christening, I totally brought the Wedgewood out.

Stunt plastic bags for guests.wow,just wow.

Gowgirl pmsl

I have a stunt accordion. I bought it second hand as such a beautiful vintage piece of Italian design. Reckoned I could learn some simple pieces with help but found it far too hard so now accordion open in case in corner of room because it looks all nice and bohemian. So far, a friend's child has fallen into it and I was clearly more bothered about the accordion than the child and I have nearly broken my toe on the fucking thing.

Oh I also have some stunt meringues. Homemade ones under a glass dome in my kitchen. They've been there since last December so will now be inedible but makes me look like Nigella!

If it's short notice I grab all the random clothes, laundry, toys, crap that's lying round the house and dump it on my bed and shut my bedroom door.
As I usually forget about it I get a nasty surprise when I go to bed and have to decide what to do with it all. (I usually dump it on the floor.)

I have a stunt living room would love to introduce it as the drawing room to guests but DH would just laugh out loud

Vote!

Or this for stealth boast!

They're lucky if I manage to hoover 😂

What about this for a stunt pineapple. Candle available at tkmaxx!

I had a friend who used to leave her husbands payslip lying around and then 'subtly' look at it/nod towards it then leave the room. She'd even leave it on the night stand in the guest bedroom .

...and Dinner Jazz in the background to create that chillaxed ambience.

So glad I've found my people..

I've never heard of a stunt pineapple, but I'm guilty of stuntplastic lemons and stunt apples, fresh from the garden, dahling.

I have a stunt Waitrose placcy bag hanging casually on a hook, and a stunt naice tea towel by the fake washing up area, which is complete with fresh sponge, wooden tray thingy and that ecofriendly washing up liquid.

I spray some pledge around, open a cookbook on a stand, make tea in a teapot and use bone china cups, albeit Sainsbury's ones. They're acceptably naice.

Anyone use a butterdish? I lob some Lurpak in it, and fill a china cup with milk.

I've even made matching purple macarons to go with the cushions pity they tasted of sawdust.

And I'm soooo glad I'm not the only one to kick the kids' tat under the sofa and bring out the naice Brio train set and, of course, the wooden bricks. Mustn't forget to add in the Boden-clad child too even if it keeps itself clean for precisely two minutes.

Seriously?
I pour bleach down the loo before they arrive and have a nice clean and tidy home.Special handwash and pineapples? Couldn't be bothered with the faff ,I'd just keep the fancy handwash out all time

Seriously??? how sad,..

This thread is hilarious .

My special effort for guests ..... is to sweep the leaves and cobwebs from the outside toilet - do I win??

I just make sure there's no cat litter scattered over the kitchen floor and house is reasonably clean. No fancy toiletries!

Tiger you've just reminded me of the time I purposefully didn't tidy away my sewing things from the coffee table for about three weeks, so it looked like I was always crafting something on the sofa. I repaired DP's ripped arse on his jeans once, that's it!

DP has just come home to find me crouched against the wall crying with laughter at your post Puny

The more I think about it, the more I realise how much of this house is a bloody stage!

Holy crap. I can't believe I forgot this.

I have a 'stunt livingroom' that is always tidy and none of us are 'allowed' to go into in the day UNLESS and unexpected visitor pops by and the rest of the house is a tip.

Hubby and I use it at night to watch TV. No kids rule.

Oh God, writing it down makes it seem even more ridiculous.

I inherited this nonsense from my nan. She always had a 'best' room that wasn't to b entered.

Most British thread ever.

When subletting our old apartment I took photographs for the ad, one of which included a bowl of tangerines, (the ones with green leaves, natch), and another one with the KitchenAid mixer which I never use in it.

Had 15 phone calls in one day

I have large white company candles and i have ingenious stunt lemons. I fill a white bowl with good quality plastic ones then put a few real ones on top.

I know stunt lemons are a thing because my daughter sent me an Internet meme with a photo of a bowl of lemons with the heading 'a huge bowl of lemons - shows you've got your f.....Ing shit together.

I knew then I was perfect.

Oh gawd this is BRILLIANT.
I am totally nabbing 'Stunt pineapple" and "fake cleaning mise-en-scene"
You people are bloody brilliant.

When selling our house, I was often shouting at my husband "don't use the show towels"

I do lots of this nonsense.

I only buy (naice) biscuits when we have visitors and I have an guilty feeling that I might have been the person who sent their hubby with the 'naice ham' shopping list 😶

I might also be guilty of just 'leaving' craft projects lying around (oh you just caught me!) And I always, always hide the shit toys and get out the wooden ones.

When my husband takes photos for instagram I have to see them beforehand to check that the house looks nice in the background.

Stunt Towels My favorite thread. Ever. May just have to NC.

I love a good towel, (would rather splurge spend on towels (and bedding) than most things)and have bought really good quality ones for us all to enjoy, not just the guests. Dear family members seem to refuse to believe that they are for them though, and scrounge up from the darkest corners of the linen closet old, worn, holy ones. I imagine all this prissing and fervor for guests comes from my home growing up, where we literally climbed over piles to sit.

I do find that I have 'friend blindness' - I only notice their nice touches and do not see anything amiss when I go visit them!