Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Mumsnet classics

Relive the funniest, most unforgettable threads. For a daily dose of Mumsnet’s best bits, sign up for Mumsnet's daily newsletter.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

Post - wedding message ... please help me, what the hell do I say??

1019 replies

Puzzledandpissedoff · 06/05/2016 12:28

I recently attended an ex-colleague's wedding where, in response to a request for cash gifts, I sent what I thought was a pretty decent cheque (£100 if it matters, though I can't help feeling it shouldn't)

Last night I received an email which opened with a few comments about how glad they were to see everybody and how generous they'd all been, then said "we were surprised that your contribution didn't seem to match the warmth of your good wishes on our big day. In view of your own position, if you wanted to send any adjustment it would be thankfully received"

For someone who's not easily shocked I confess I'm utterly gobsmacked by this. So as not to drip feed I'll mention that "your own position" probably refers to a recent inheritance I've had, which maybe they expected something from (and this is an ex-colleague, remember, not a close friend or relative)

Please, anyone, what do I do now? I've never come across anything like this before and still can't quite believe they've done it - but since they have, should I reply, ring them, ignore it or what??

OP posts:
Thread gallery
8
Teddy1970 · 06/05/2016 20:06

I'm not surprised my this thread, there are a lot of entitled, cheeky sods out there..

ALemonyPea · 06/05/2016 20:02

How rude!

Could you donate a goat via Oxfam on their behalf, send them the information and comment in the card that there are real issues in the world that don't revolve around her.

Baconyum · 06/05/2016 19:59

For those calling the veracity of the post into question

1 MN have responded on that score, OP has probably not posted because nobody likes to be called a liar.

2 I was recently on a thread (that I can't find sorry someone else can link?)
Where much worse cheeky fuckery was talked about and that and real life experience means I for one am not at all surprised that this could happen! Some people seem to lose all sense and decency when dealing with their weddings!

mrssnowface · 06/05/2016 19:57

unbelievable

anotherdayanothersquabble · 06/05/2016 19:56

Shocking. If she does engage, suggest she prints her own email and puts it somewhere to read back to her older self one day.

Teddy1970 · 06/05/2016 19:56

I can't wait to see what the money grabber's reply is..

pmama · 06/05/2016 19:52

Just ignore it, and forget it/them... it is so rude... I cannot believe that their wedding was all about the money... not about the celebration, not about the great day having together. Fully a business - costs and income, profit or loss, what a shame.

Pipbin · 06/05/2016 19:52

The utter nerve. I think £100 is extremely generous.
I have to say that I don't see the point in wedding gifts now that people live together for so long before they marry. It's not like years ago when they would be setting up home. I didn't ask for anything for my wedding. It was my problem that I was getting married, no one else's.

While I'm here, why can no one read that the cheque has been cashed.

VioletVaccine · 06/05/2016 19:52

FindoGask I said the same but MNHQ deleted the post!

notagiraffe · 06/05/2016 19:52

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

RandomMess · 06/05/2016 19:50

There is nowt as strange as folk is there!!!

Why would you invite anyone in the hope they would give a huge £££ gift, just bonkers.

LemonRedwood · 06/05/2016 19:49

I've got all the way here and am upset there's been no reply yet Sad

Over-invested and need to get a life

FindoGask · 06/05/2016 19:48

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 06/05/2016 19:46

Have I read this correctly. They emailed you to say, that £100 is not enough. The fucking hard faced fuckers.

Id be emailing them back saying.
As my very generous gift of £100 is not sufficient enough. I would like it back please. It's a gift. Not a tax. They can like it or lump it
20 years ago. I'd have struggled to believe brass neck like this, but. Absolutely nothing shocks me, now.
I doubt you will but don't you dare give them one more penny.

BlueFolly · 06/05/2016 19:46

Pleeeease let her reply!

happygoluckylady · 06/05/2016 19:46

Not being funny but this seems really familiar. Am sure I've read of something similar happening before on MN, including the inheritance. Maybe I'm wrong. Hmm

MerryMarigold · 06/05/2016 19:44

Oh, I'm a bit sad the OP didn't apologise and ask if 500.00 would be enough or if 1,000 would be better, and then let us know...now we'll never know what 'adjustment' they were thinking of.

Wdigin2this · 06/05/2016 19:40

How f***g rude....I am sitting here with my jaw dropped!!!! Abso-bloody-lutely, cancel the cheque, don't think of replying, and delete these horrid people from your phone list/email/social media/etc....and never speak to them again!! Shock

ExasperatedAlmostAlways · 06/05/2016 19:37

I'm absolutely gobsmacked. I'd of replied,

"Hello, Thank you for inviting me. I am glad you had a nice wedding day as after all getting married to the one you love and celebrating with friends and family is the main purpose of the day (not receiving cash) However, are you seriously implying 100 pounds from a single, ex colleague, isn't a decent gift? Did you mean to be so cheeky? If yes, wow! You can fuck right off you cheeky, money grabbing bint. I hope you have a long, happy marriage. Don't contact me again"

Tate15 · 06/05/2016 19:36

Liberatedwine

I'd get a load of bed sheets and spray paint them with

I GAVE GREEDY MCGREEDY £100 AS A WEDDING GIFT AND THE UNGRATEFUL COW ASKED FOR MORE!

and hang them all over town!

Or hire one of those triangle billboards to tow around the area with a picture of the bride and the message as above!

HeirOfNothingInParticular · 06/05/2016 19:36

Outrageous. I would be ashamed if my daughter did that. Your gift was more than generous. They are very rude. Manners maketh (wo)man,

Dumdedumdedum · 06/05/2016 19:35

Many years ago, in another country, MIL was asked to give a donation (of any amount at all) towards a plasma TV for a couple who were already living together and had all the basics they needed. Against our advice, MIL gave the happy couple a coffee pot as she objected to giving money, it not being a tradition in her culture. The married couple graciously thanked her for the coffee pot. That's all.

ShebaShimmyShake · 06/05/2016 19:31

Send the greedy rude ungrateful bint a pair of duelling pistols with a note stating, "One of you will thank me later."

liberatedwine · 06/05/2016 19:30

I would print the email and show it to your friends. I would also name and shame her on Facebook. Cheeky bint.

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

Join Mumsnet Log In
This thread is not accepting new messages.
Swipe left for the next trending thread