DH has been cleansing his face ... with anti-bacterial bathroom wipes.

Ouchy.

I took a swig of yellow Flash liquid one day instead of mouthwash. The bottles feel the same when you're not looking properly. Thankfully it was me and not one of the kids.

My DH has terrible eyesight but obviously can't wear his glasses in the shower. I always have to buy him exactly the same brand of shampoo and shower gel so he can tell by the shape of the bottle which one to use. It's not always easy for him with all the lotions and potions that our DDs have in the bathroom.

My Dad is notorious for putting Comfort fabric conditioner down the toilet as a cleaner! Mum was furious, although I bet the toilet's cistern is lovely and soft now.

When I was 19, I came back from the pub quite drunk one night and decided to dye my hair black. Considering my sloshed state I did an ok job. Unfortunately I also dyed all the fine downy hairs on my face. I decided to try and sort this out with bleach based bathroom cleaner. When this failed to do this job effectively, I decided to immac the hair off.
I have done some spectacularly stupid things in my life but this is one that still makes me cringe.

Get a bottle of witch hazel and get him to Dan it on and it'll take the redness straight out. It's magic stuff and you can get it in chemist or supermarket I have sensitive skin so I've always got some handy.

My dad always used to blame my mum if he did something like this 'why didn't you tell me,' probably because she thought he had a bit of sense!

It reminds me of someone I know who bought a femfresh deodorant. Her partner remarked a week later 'that deodorant smells lovely'. She asked him if it was the dove stuff and he said no the other one. Once she stopped laughing she said 'that's not for your armpits it's for ladybits!' His comment to that was 'aw what? You mean I've been walking about smelling like a fanny all week?'

Stomach crunching with laughter.

My dad used toilet duck wipes instead of Andrex wet wipes once. Mum can't help but tell the story to everyone she knows.

Silvermachine that's brilliant!!!

Poor wee scone!

That is very much the sort of thing my DH would do, I'm quite surprised he hasn't actually!

I got some free sun lotion from work, a posh one you only use once a day.

Happily rubbed the children all over before school and stuck their caps on their heads.

Got to school, went to kiss them goodbye and they were both glinting glitter like R Patz in Twilight.

It was a glimmer version. Oops.

At least his face will be germ free, albeit rather sore.
My dosy DH once used saline nasal drops instead of allergy eye drops. He wondered why they weren't working very well.

This thread has had me in fits of laughter

The worst my DH has done is wash DS in shampoo instead of soap, which would have been fine except DH completely panicked and came running out of the bathroom shouting "oh no! I've messed up! I've washed the boy in shampoo!" Poor 7 year old DS was stood in the bath looking shocked and covered in foam. I couldn't resist replying "Well that's it now. He'll be completely covered in hair by tomorrow morning!" (Out of earshot of poor DS of course)

DH once informed me that we had run out of wipes and he needed some urgently. I told him to use the bottle of Cillit Bang and a J cloth instead. Next thing I know, he is changing DS's nappy, armed with the Cillit Bang and a J cloth! He meant baby wipes

Wouldn't be one bit surprised if my DH did this. It's like he takes a brainfart around just about anything used in the bathroom - I've had to tell him numerous times to stop using my conditioner as shower gel ffs!

He's still lovely though :)

My dad once wiped his arse with a Flash wipe.

He came out of the loo, wincing slightly, and told my mum that he didn't think much of the baby wipes on the cistern. She said there weren't any baby wipes on the cistern, then quickly realised what he'd done

These are hilarious. When I was a teenager and still lived with dps I used to dye my hair pillar-box red. I used a colour enhancing shampoo that had semi permanent red dye in to help stop it from fading. It took df quite a while to realise that his greying hair was gradually turning a lovely shade of pink.

My sil had been using bathroom wipes to clean her bum after going to loo

But what about the minty face wash?

Please don't tell us it is mouthwash?

It's 5:30am here and I've just woken DH shaking the bed I'm laughing so much, he thought I was upset and crying. Thank you all for sharing, I don't dare go and reread the fatball thread, will save it for later.

crying with laughter here. The whole scenario... the wiping, the blaming, the post-it notes, the trip to the pharmacy. Hahaha.

You really shouldn't use hydrocortisone on your face without medical supervision, but some good thick moisturiser is probably all that he needs now he's stopped using the wipes.

You have made me laugh a lot though!

My DGF did similar but used them on his Arse. He thought they were toilet tissue.