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Original poster

is this the worst and most self-absorbed piece of journalism ever written? (most amusing)

453 replies

whensantagotstuckupAITCHimney · 13/12/2006 23:12

Without a word of a lie, this was printed in The Evening Standard the other day after the tornado. A friend of mine has picked it up and thinks it's worth celebrating in all its pompous, un-self-aware, London meeja whore bourgeois pig awfulness. it's not a piss-take. really it isn't.

"My tornado hell. This is to celebrate and remember the excellent article by freelance writer Caroline Phillips from the Evening Standard. When it was printed is irrelevant, the point is to keep it alive forever, long after the last landfill has rotted away, we are all dust, and your children's children's children may revel in the words contained herein." here

OP posts:
JackieNoHoHo · 14/12/2006 18:02

This is just the most brilliant thread. I am, however, getting a bit of a 'She Who Must Not Be Named' vibe...

lostinfrance · 14/12/2006 17:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

NotAnOtter · 14/12/2006 17:53

what a CROCK OF SHITE

SantaGotStuckUpTheGreensleeve · 14/12/2006 17:48

pmsl

CarolinePhillips · 14/12/2006 17:47

it's quite a big arse, to be fair.

TooTickyDoves · 14/12/2006 17:44

But how did she manage to fit so much designer furniture up her own arse? (This is where she lives, isn't it?)

DizzyBinterWonderland · 14/12/2006 17:17

OMG just seen this! thanks aitch, very funny!

foxtrottothefestivegrotto · 14/12/2006 17:08

or 'VomitedClementines'

SantaGotStuckUpTheGreensleeve · 14/12/2006 17:05

Or "HACKchetface"

CarolinePhillips · 14/12/2006 17:03

[hurt]

SantaGotStuckUpTheGreensleeve · 14/12/2006 17:03

I'm sure "homelesshorsefacedhack" is still available

CarolinePhillips · 14/12/2006 17:02

you would, greeny, you would.

CarolinePhillips · 14/12/2006 17:01

although i reserve the right to come back and make further appearances as Caroline... what about a Caroline vs Xenia face-off at the Not Of This WOrld Olympics?

foxtrottothefestivegrotto · 14/12/2006 17:01

if the real CP does show up she won't be able to use her own name. how will we know 'tis her?

SantaGotStuckUpTheGreensleeve · 14/12/2006 17:01

No, I would have held out much longer than that

ClementClarkeMoore · 14/12/2006 17:00

Greeny?

CarolinePhillips · 14/12/2006 16:58

aaah fuckaaff you bunch of unsympathetic bastards... it's not that easy you know. i've got better things to be doing that pretending to be a po-faced chubby blonde hackette for your entertainment. and i even used capitals and everything.

tortoiseBells · 14/12/2006 16:54

But, am I right in thinking she 'can't risk living there anymore' because of the scientologists and the risk of them summoning further tornadoes?

expatinscotland · 14/12/2006 16:54

Let's hash out how the audition's going to go!

Director: Your lines, please.

Candidate: Erm. Oh. Erm. No wait, don't tell me.

'Duck, Magnum! Duck!'

ClementClarkeMoore · 14/12/2006 16:54

She's a 'shiny-faced' mumsnetter!

SantaGotStuckUpTheGreensleeve · 14/12/2006 16:53

Hmmm, I don't think it's that convincing, sadly. It would be so cool if it really was her

UnquietDad · 14/12/2006 16:52

Who would you like to play you in the film, CP?

(She is either real or very convincing.)

ClementClarkeMoore · 14/12/2006 16:52

Twiglett unveil yourself!

'waiting for the cleaner to come and iron' like that would be relevant information.

lulumama · 14/12/2006 16:51

scientology......there's a tangent.......

and no , she isn't..........she is averse to vomited clementines, tis all...

CarolinePhillips · 14/12/2006 16:50

Well the BBC were very interested in me, Enideepmidwinter, even if you aren't. I had a call today from a senior producer to check that I am okay. That is the sort of small, unasked kindness I am accustomed to receiving.

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