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Original poster

AIBU re this odd request from neighbours?

485 replies

yorkshapudding · 02/08/2015 16:51

Our NDN's came over to tell us that they are having some work done in their back garden starting tomorrow- having a fence built, some trees cut down, rubbish cleared etc. They estimate it will be about two full days work, possibly more. They then told us that they were going away and would not be back until after the job has finished. They explained that they don't want to leave the workmen a key for "security reasons" so this means they will have no power source to plug tools in, no access to a bathroom or kettle etc. so would we be in and if so would we mind 'helping out' with those things.

I explained that DH will be at work and while I am actually off work for the next couple of days, I will have various errands, things to do, want to take DC out etc. so will be in and out of the house. They then asked when I was planning on going out so they could let their workmen know and saying "oh don't worry, they'll work around you". I told them that I hadn't made firm plans and didn't know when I would be going out. To be honest I don't really want to be tied to a schedule and I also don't like the idea of three strange men traipsing around my house for two days. I told them that I was sorry but they needed to either provide them with a key or arrange for the work to be done at a time when they would be home as we couldn't be on hand for two days to provide cups of tea, electricity and access to bathroom facilities etc.

Although they were polite, I got the distinct feeling that NDN's thought I was being mean and not very neighbourly.

AIBU or is it a bit much to expect me to accommodate all this? Initially I thought they were being cheeky (they don't want to leave these men a key but I should just open my house up to them!) and that it was a bit of a strange request but due to their reaction (they seemed quite surprised that I said no) I'm now doubting myself. They are generally quite annoying neighbours, nothing too awful just a bit noisy and inconsiderate at times, so I don't trust myself to be objective!

OP posts:

PestoSwimissimos · 05/08/2015 18:57

Ha ha ha! Great update OP, they do sound like a right couple of twonks

The5DayChicken · 05/08/2015 18:49

Any reasonable person would be embarrassed, but a reasonable person wouldn't have sent the builders to you after being told no either!

Original poster

yorkshapudding · 05/08/2015 18:46

I'm going to leave it. I've had a difficult enough day, really can't be bothered to deal with them. I wasn't looking to start an argument. I was just going to tell them that I was disappointed that they had told the builders they could use our electric, facilities when we'd actually said no and that I expect a bit more consideration in future. They're clearly in no mood to have a reasonable conversation though so there's no point.

I doubt they'll come round. It's between them and the builders, surely? Also, I would have thought they'd be embarrassed and want to avoid me since they clearly told their builders they had permission to use our electric when they didn't.

OP posts:

Preminstreltension · 05/08/2015 18:42

Love that your NDN thought he could choose to make your side look shit

prettybird · 05/08/2015 18:38

Re the fence posts, it would appear that while the fence posts on the owner's side is the norm, it's not an absolute requirement. This is quite interesting.

But I don't get the impression that the NDNs would've wanted to "gift" the few extra inches that fence posts on your side would've given you. They'd have expected that the fence itself ran along the boundary line - and that YOU should've had the fence posts on your land.

Be thankful to those builders - they've saved you the expense of a boundary dispute!

The5DayChicken · 05/08/2015 18:37

If someone interrupted me watching bake off to discuss how entitled they are, they'd be feeling particularly sorry for themselves afterwards.

BerylStreep · 05/08/2015 18:37

In all seriousness, there is no need for you to go and speak to them. They tried to take the piss, you were quietly assertive in dealing with it. No more action required.

QueenOfThorns · 05/08/2015 18:36

Well I'm glad they're unhappy, but I hope they don't come round and take it up with you during Bake Off. That would be the most unreasonable thing they'd done so far

The5DayChicken · 05/08/2015 18:33

I would definitely not go round if they're rowing with everyone in sight! They obviously overestimated how much the builders could get done without electricity! Serves the twits right. Very amused that they think the fence thingimabobs should be on your side...wouldn't they then be on your property? Wouldn't be surprised if they knocked on later.

Original poster

yorkshapudding · 05/08/2015 18:31

They seem to be running out of steam now...as long as they shut up in time for bake off

OP posts:

mrsg1888 · 05/08/2015 18:28

Haha good update I'm glad they are unhappy pair of idiots lol
Hopefully they shut up and you can have a wee chilled out night now

divafever24 · 05/08/2015 18:21

Thanks for the update op, don't think the builders will be returning!

Original poster

yorkshapudding · 05/08/2015 18:07

Well, I have returned from a rather stressful and difficult day at work and you lot really have given me a much needed giggle.

Alas, the elderly lady neighbour is not Korean. I agree she would make a grand addition to the MN community but she thinks that internet is "full of paedophiles" and won't have a computer or even a mobile phone because "they give you cancer" so probably not going to happen

So, down to business. I knew NDN's were home when I got back as their car was on their drive and I could hear their bloody dog barking as per usual. I was about to drop my work stuff in the house then go straight round and give them a peace of my mind before I had chance to chicken out. When I got in I could hear raised voices coming from the back garden, went and stood by the back door so I could have a proper eavesdrop and realised it was NDN having a row with the builders. Basically, they've finished the fence but apparently they were supposed to do some other stuff that they haven't done. Builders dispute this and say if he wants more work done they need more money, NDN doesn't think he should have to pay etc ect etc.. However, NDN's biggest grievance is the fence, which he says is the wrong height and back to front. Builders tell him he's wrong, the fence posts are supposed to be on his side. NDN disagrees, thinks it's "ridiculous" that he's paying for a fence that looks nicer on our side than it does on theirs. Then female NDN comes out and starts having a go, Male NDN says "go back inside, I'm dealing with it", she starts with "don't tell me to go back inside"...it was all kicking off basically. DD selfishly interrupted my eavesdropping by wanting her tea so I don't know what transpired after that but at some point NDN's went back inside and the builders packed up and left. NDN's are still arguing though (can't hear what they're saying, just raised voices and the odd word here and there) so now not sure what to do! I'd psyched myself up, I was all ready to march round there and have a word but now they're having a row it doesn't seem right for me to knock on the door and interrupt. I feel like somebody's pissed on my strawberries to be honest.

OP posts:

Collaborate · 05/08/2015 18:06

Go now. I'm waiting for when it's repeated on Dave.

djrmrcbhyvf · 05/08/2015 17:58

I need to go to Tesco - should I go now or wait for the update?

BitchBags · 05/08/2015 17:48

Ahh op I have just scrolled the whole way through for an update! We need to know :)

EmpressKnowsWhereHerTowelIs · 05/08/2015 17:24

Waiting here too...

londonrach · 05/08/2015 17:20

Waiting op...

dustarr73 · 05/08/2015 15:42

Come on op im hanging here.I need my fix

Findtheoldme · 05/08/2015 15:36

Gutted no update yet .

Lashalicious · 05/08/2015 15:32

I thought at first they were asking you to keep their key and open up, say a garage for electrical, in the morning for the workmen's access and then lock up at night. But no, this is not it at all.

Trust your first instinct. This is a bunch of craziness. I have great neighbors and we help each other out quite a bit. I've taken care of neighbors' pets and houses on many occasions while they're on vacation and they have helped us in many ways too, one time coming over after a storm had felled several trees into our driveway and clearing them all out before we even woke up the next morning! And brought us breakfast! And it wasn't even trees from their yard. And no, they weren't doing it to collect the wood.

Anyway, none of us would ask for something like this--provide workmen with tea, bathrooms, electricity, etc. for two days for someone else's house?
That is beyond anything I've ever heard.

Your neighbors need to hire a house sitter, perhaps a relative of theirs, that can keep an eye on their house and provide those things that are their responsibility to provide.

These "neighbors" would not lower themselves to do the same for you, you can take that to the bank. They are treating you like unpaid round the clock servants. Ridiculous. I wouldn't have anything further to do with them at all. They are not good neighbors.

starfishmummy · 05/08/2015 15:26

The outside power when we moved here was an extension type cable plugged into a socket in the utility room, out a catflap, along a path and then buried a under a few inches of soil all the way to the shed at the other end of the garden. Just normal indoor electric flex. We immediately unplugged it and cut off the flex that is above ground. The underground part is still there and has scared several gardeners - almost to the point of an involuntary "download"!! Any bits we see are removed but actually getting it all out is hard!

Metacentric · 05/08/2015 15:03

The cable disappears into a hole drilled into the kitchen wall into what's the cupboard housing the boiler.

Hmm, you should definitely get someone in if they've cut it into the boiler supply.

NiceBitOfCheese · 05/08/2015 14:57

This needs to go in Classics, can't believe nobody's suggested it before now.

LadyPlumpington · 05/08/2015 14:52

DH never announces his bowel movements, before or after - he merely closes the door behind himself and looks up with an air of wounded dignity if you happen to open the door for a chat (small house).

He struggles with the DC's habit of throwing the door open and shouting 'WHAT ARE YOU DOING DADDY? ARE YOU POOPING? GNNNNNNGH!'

Poor DH

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