HOT TITS!!

My lovely daughter kept shouting she wanted an Elsa 'vage' for her birthday in Tesco, took me a while to work it out, to my shock announced she got a big vage at nursery, she actually had a big badge with 4 on, ended up trying to tell her it's a rosette!!

DS just learning names of cutlery rather than calling everything a spoon. We discovered this the other day when he shouted from his highchair "fucker on floor Mummy"

Downstairs Piss off is said quite regularly in our house too, DD2 has a lip tie so miss pronounces a lot of things even though she's 4 next week sadly but we all enjoy her current a Frozen obsession and her fave doll Kristoff = Piss Off. I want Piss off, where's piss off?! She gets quite annoyed bless her.

Dad's work sent him and three male colleagues away to Wales on a technical training course for a week. It made sense for them all to meet at our house and travel down in one car. They came for Sunday tea then drove off into the night as we waived them off at bedtime. Fast forward to Monday morning, and my school diary entry for the weekend was "Daddy has gone away for the week and mummy had three big men round".

In Tesco's at peak busy time... two toddler boys in the trolley, having full on tantrums, one shouting he wanted "hot shit" (chocolate) and the other shouting that he wanted a "fu*k" (truck). I was so embarrassed I abandoned the shopping and went home!

DD's best one was when she used to loudly exclaim that she wanted to "whore"

"Mummy I want to whore"

she meant draw...

Hahaha some brilliant ones here .

DS "fck it Daddy fck it (holding up a broken toy)
DH (desperately trying not to laugh) "yes I'll fix it for you"

One Christmas "milf pie"for mince pie.

I haven't laughed so long or so loud in a very long time. My ribs ache. Fantastic thread

My ds shouts "bat shit" when he wants new batteries for his toys, and "bitch shit" for biscuit

Just read this thread and I am so happy to find out my ds is not the only child to have called popcorn 'cockporn'!!!

Crying here at Vagina Puddleduck and Poohs friend Bigot!

GraceK how funny, DD (bfed until age 2) used to call milk "nook" and breasts "nookies" and bras "nookie pouches", all very logical really

Euphemia DD (then 18 months, now 11) used to say "Beebosh" too...only she thought she was saying "pencil" (she told us later)

When my DD was starting to talk I gave her a stern telling off for saying (what I thought was) 'old bastard'. later we worked out it was octopus.

My eldest DS (now 4) used to shout 'shite' every time nursery changed his nappy. They actually called me in to discuss it! Obviously he was pointing out the ceiling light hanging over the changing mat...

On a slightly less embarrassing note, he also called apples 'bubbles' for a very long time. In my house we will probably forever more have bubble juice, bubble pie, bubble cake... :D

My friend's DD is 18 months now and we're having great fun with her new words. She pulled my top down and shouted "boobies!" last time I saw her, and later that afternoon she dropped her snack on the carpet and said, "oh, fark". I looked at my friend, who looked back at me and asked if she'd really just said that. I pointed out that her using "fark" as an alternative for the past 18 months probably wasn't much better than the usual word

DS called Pooh's pink friend Bigot for ages. Sadly, he's now able to say Piglet...

Ps op could hot tits mean chocolate?
Or are they looking at attractive ladies at the time?

Tbh my eldest DS when about 18 months used to throw his hands in the air and shout "Tits!!" In my defence it was a very, very long boring car journey when I taught him how to do it...

My daughter likes to play with sounds and words and managed to invent and love the word nigga
There were lots of other similar sounding sounds 'ligga', 'figga' etc
She was running round the house saying it (Definitely NOT a word she has heard in context before) so we were stuck between ignoring it or explaining what it means.
Fun
We explained.

Dh has a French Connection t-shirt from years ago with the slogan: 'run like fcuk' which he used for gym attire. When dd started to learn to read I ordered dh not to wear it anymore as she would read anything in sight, anyway he forgot one day after the gym and this is what happened in the supermarket:
Dd: Daddy why are you drinking that, you haven't paid for it yet? (This is one of my bugbears and I never let dd open anything until we have paid)
Dh: Errrrr... I have, I already scanned it so I've paid for it.
Lady standing near us has a bit of chuckle about dh being put on the spot, I look [sceptical].
Dd (very loudly): Run. Like. FUCK!
Dh and I stand open mouthed. Lady looks stunned and makes herself scarce.
Me(whispering through gritted teeth): I told you not to wear that t shirt!
I turn to dd and say: dd, you mustn't say that. that's a naughty word
Dd: what's a naughty word?
Me: there are some words you aren't allowed to say
Dd: YOU MEAN FUCK?
Out of the corner of my eye I can see other shoppers pretending to look at the crisps while uncontrollably shaking silently with laughter. At that point we exit the premises.

I have a friend who called the Fat Controller from Thomas the Tank Engine, the Fuckatroller..