School report 'code' - which ones have you spotted/do you know about?

Beyond hope = somehow, despite her doing no work for three years and not handing in a single completed HW I find myself still having to write a report for Elephants.

My lovely, long suffering, set one Welsh master.

DD2's German teacher is in much the same position, but he has far less of a sense of humour. He moans and gives out detentions.

DS got "he is able to recall detailed facts on a variety of scientific matters, which he often enthusiastically shares with the class during discussion times"...subtext...."whether or not they want to hear it, or it is relevant to the day's lesson"

I received Ds1's report today.

"Science : DS1 already knew interesting information about most things we looked at this year, which was more than happy to share with the rest of the class"

Another example of "please give someone else a turn" I think!

These are good. I have warned dsi's nursery teachers she is spirited and feisty already and I don't want it knocked out of her even if she refuses to participate sometimes. Nothing to do with school and everything to do with putting boys off her when she is older!

DS is getting his first report tomorrow. Lively and eager to join in class discussions will definately not feature. Cheeky, happy and quiet might. Adults don't see his cheeky side until he's really comfortable with them.

X listens carefully to others and thinks before responding= I haven't caught X telling others that there are stupid and know nothing (unlike others in the class).

My finest report comment (which I love to this day) was

Honeydragon is spasmodically motivated*

*if Honeydragon feels we are teaching something that interests her she will turn up, if not Mr Adams will drop her coursework off at the Queens Head, in the understanding she will hand it in in due course.

Most definitely not in code, I once got
"cakes seems to spend much of her time watching what I am doing with mine"
(I was bright and bored!)

Today I was sorting out some old school stuff and found some sort of class-building activity of DD2's class from two years ago - a little handmade booklet where each person in the class, including the two main teachers, had to write something nice about each child. I hadn't seen it before, and it's mortifying.

Teacher 1: I like the way you have an honest and clear way of expressing yourself = you're a bit of a mouthy nightmare
...and how you are friendly and supportive with a sense of fun = you and your mates back each other up when you're making mischief

Teacher 2: I like your sharp-sightedness = you notice it straight away when we screw up
...and your ability to deal with subjects sensitively that most people avoid = there's a very good reason most people avoid them, could you not learn from that?
...and your humorous perspective on things = no, that particular subject is never going to be funny!

.

He's been called lazy on more than one report. It's a fair cop, if a little dispiriting...

Is able, with encouragement, to contribute some good ideas to class discussion: tuned in to what we were talking about once in six months and finally answered one question when really, really pushed.

I wish our teachers would write in code. DS1 looks awful on paper

Sorry!

I have two under three's, but i remember getting

"Million is very enthusiastic" - translated to "she never bloody sits still!

When written about a NT child: X prefers to work with adult support= I need to sit next to X to get them to put pencil to paper.

I got 'WestmorlandSausage is an enigma.' on a report from my sixth form head of year.

On the one hand its pretty direct... if I was an alternative type student. I wasn't, I was a pretty ordinary, average student who had some extra curricular activities that occasionally meant I didn't get homework in on time. WTAF was she getting at? Any suggestions? Was I actually the the weird kid they couldn't figure out?

After an activity holiday I got 'Enjoyed the chance to use her leadership skills to great advantage'.

Translation-bossy little madam!

These are a few I use (secondary teacher)
Frequent contributor to class discussions - never shuts up
Lively member of class - has never stayed in seat for an entire lesson
a very popular pupil with a wide circle of friends - no matter who I sit them next to they will chat
Confident - convinced their opinion is more important than anyone else's

That was a crossed post with Queen .

Dynamic = noisy little fecker

X is keen to take on responsibility around the school = X bosses younger children in the playground while being a 'play leader' or X leaps up all the time to volunteer to get the register/ collect photocopying/ open the door in order to avoid working.

I may get banned from the teachers equivalent of the Magic Circle for revealing these

Ooh watching with interest. Dd gets her report next week.