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Do you dunk your penis?

995 replies

SaraCrewe · 08/10/2013 09:16

I considered name changing for this, but, fuck it.

We have a dedicated post-sex cleanup area on the bedside table. A box of tissues, a small bin, and a beaker of clean water for temporary cleaning/dunking while the bathroom is occupied by me.

Apparently our penis beaker is strange and not the done thing.

Does everyone else just lay there in a sticky post coital glow until morning? Really?

OP posts:
KatoPotato · 08/10/2013 11:38

Penis Beaker is top rack safe...

SouthernComforts · 08/10/2013 11:38
Grin

Is the penis beaker permanently filled up and ready, or is the filling of the beaker a subtle sign that you're in the mood?

If he fills up the PB in anticipation, but you don't want any PB fun do you pour it away again?

Do you never have spontaneous sex somewhere without a penis beaker to hand?

So.Many.Questions.

FTR I'm a slattern that just falls asleep afterwards! or calls a taxi

RetroHippy · 08/10/2013 11:37

Well, I've had my eyes opened re: popping candy. I did try the old 'champagne Aldi Prosecco blow job' once. It didn't go down well.

Haha. Go down. That wasn't even on purpose.

BigW · 08/10/2013 11:36

Blush x post

FatPenguin · 08/10/2013 11:35

And it goes in the dishwasher and back in the cupboard Envy
So it was a pee beaker, it has now progressed onto a penis beaker.... What next? Will you potty train with it?

BigW · 08/10/2013 11:35

Zachary did you just make that? Or did you just having knocking around?

SayCoolNowSayWhip · 08/10/2013 11:35

Grin Ripping, yes! Imagine him as your butler....

ZacharyQuack · 08/10/2013 11:35

That, rather appropriately is a golf ball cleaner

Pop your todger in that bad boy and it'll be so clean you could eat your dinner with off it.

SaraCrewe · 08/10/2013 11:35

Haha zachary!

OP posts:
RippingYarns · 08/10/2013 11:34

SayCool that jug looks like David Niven Grin

MamaChubbyLegs · 08/10/2013 11:33

Zachary, what even IS that??!

RippingYarns · 08/10/2013 11:32

Zachary Grin

you made that, didn't you

not glasses, spectacles Blush

BigW · 08/10/2013 11:32

This thread is amazing.

Sara you have a 4 month old? Does your heart sink when your OH turns up for bed, penis beaker in hand? I was far too tired for any of those shenanigans when DS was 4 months old.

mumtosome61 · 08/10/2013 11:32

I don't get what is disgusting about a penis beaker in a dishwasher.

You put the junk in your mouth - that's gotta be more....aromatic.

SayCoolNowSayWhip · 08/10/2013 11:31

No, definitely this one

Kaluki · 08/10/2013 11:31

Oh My Word!!!
This thread needs to go in MN Classics - I have been trying so hard not to burst out laughing in the office!!
Its a loo roll by the bed in my house. DP is the first guy I have ever been with who likes to wipe after though - I think most men just roll over and fall asleep don't they!

ZacharyQuack · 08/10/2013 11:30

You won't get it properly clean with just a swish of tepid water.

You need one of these babies

LEMisdisappointed · 08/10/2013 11:29

Actually toothpaste has a similar effect to popping candy

RippingYarns · 08/10/2013 11:28

if there's any willy-wangling by a servant to be done, i want the water to be presented like this

SayCoolNowSayWhip · 08/10/2013 11:26

Not a jug, Ripping, a beaker obviously....

RippingYarns · 08/10/2013 11:25

or ringing the bell pull and a minion scuttles in with a jug and towel Grin

SayCoolNowSayWhip · 08/10/2013 11:25

But LEM don't you then need to go and brush your teeth?

FreshWest · 08/10/2013 11:25

"Or will Sir require the penis beaker this evening?"

dobedobedo · 08/10/2013 11:25

I am so glad I joined mn. cries with laughter

LEMisdisappointed · 08/10/2013 11:23

I clean my dp with my mouth - all part of the service :)