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Do you dunk your penis?

995 replies

SaraCrewe · 08/10/2013 09:16

I considered name changing for this, but, fuck it.

We have a dedicated post-sex cleanup area on the bedside table. A box of tissues, a small bin, and a beaker of clean water for temporary cleaning/dunking while the bathroom is occupied by me.

Apparently our penis beaker is strange and not the done thing.

Does everyone else just lay there in a sticky post coital glow until morning? Really?

OP posts:
Sleepgrumpydopey · 11/10/2013 00:05

Do you take the beaker on holiday too? Or do you use the hotel glasses uuuurrrgggghh Shock

InsultingBadger · 10/10/2013 23:56

Oh OP this has gone viral!

Have to admit the eBay listings are amazing! And there are bids!

maximum4 · 10/10/2013 23:48

OMG this is sooooo funny. I was just laughing out so loudly, with tears rolling down my cheek, that I woke my mother up (who is on holiday staying) as she thought it was the dog howling!! This is an EPIC post... Thank you so much everyone for your 'take' on this! No penis beaker in this household. Just tissues & a trip to the bathroom by us both usually at the same time! Mother now fully aware of why I was laughing so much. She was also crying with me...

KezzieJJ · 10/10/2013 23:46

Funniest post I have EVER seen on MN. Found out about it first in the Evening Standard on way home from work today, and just read about it again on news.com.au - the Aussies love it! Absolutely brilliant - haven't laughed so hard in ages (scuze the pun ;) laughs hysterically *

Frank1313 · 10/10/2013 23:41

Sara Crew anagram - Screw Area

FattyFishwife · 10/10/2013 23:40

I used alcohol gel to clean my 'flue'....what?!?! I come from a rough estate! Grin

no...I jest, I cried my leg off when the batteries in my vibrator leaked and went all lover my foof at the tender age of 17. Come to think of it, I could have done with a cup of cold water to throw over it!

Im of the roll over and go to sleep and clean up in the morning brigade (providing im NOT on the wet patch)

Trills · 10/10/2013 23:39

4 years from now, namechanged MNers won't be saying "red rug, river of sweetcorn, poo pouffe", they'll be saying "penis beaker".

That is the highest possible accolade.

DeathStar · 10/10/2013 23:38

"TK-421, do you copy? I repeat, TK-421 - why aren't you at your post? Oops. Looks like we have a leaky beaker - I'll have to clear it..."

bikerwitch13 · 10/10/2013 23:36

Thanks Manthing :) Please feel free to share the ebay listing, over 340 views this evening so far! Penis Beaker could be the making of me

BinksToEnlightenment · 10/10/2013 23:31

This is the first thread I've ever been told about by by boyfriend instead of the other way round. It inspired me to demand to know what he does in the bathroom immediately after sex.

ZingWantsCake · 10/10/2013 23:30

en-suite bathrooms are overrated, aren't they?

Buffyboo · 10/10/2013 23:22

I really really need to know from the OP now this thread has gone viral and been read by millions ... What on earth is Mr Crewe's reaction? Has he seen the funny side, or is he so furious that the world is discussing his penis-dunking antics that the beaker has been put into retirement?? I'm worried for your marriage Sara!

Donkeyok · 10/10/2013 23:11

Oh my gog my dd just brought out her science homework LEAKY BEAKERS! she kept asking me for my imput to how the size of the hole would vary the flow of the water - aargh so hard to keep a straight face, she kept saying its not that funny mummy.

NightGeeza · 10/10/2013 23:09

Sorry Bro,

But if I can I nip to the loo and rinse off in the sink, if that's not poss i wipe on the sheets and pass out, no one's caught me yet!

NG

montychelts · 10/10/2013 23:09

oh my god. I have never read such a comical account in my life. Honestly your life must just rock. Why don't you just chill out and enjoy the post coital bliss and wash your sheets more regularly. un-fucking-believable!!

Tom8112 · 10/10/2013 23:07

I have just become aware of this from my wife, I'm a designer, so I want to hear your feedback.
IF you were to tell all your husband's about this it could really be successful.

I will design this 'penis beaker' as a cleaning product called "Spunk and Dunk" thoughts?

Justgemm · 10/10/2013 23:03

Do these penis beakers come in different sizes? I sense a dragon den moment!??

ItsSoooFluffy · 10/10/2013 23:03

Oh my gosh crazymum Shock

crazymumm87 · 10/10/2013 22:59

We certainly dont have a dunkin cup. There was one occasion though my husband couldn't find anything to wipe himself so he used the curtain!!! I went crazy and screamed, he jumped in shock and fell through the window (smashed through the glass) which resulted in about a third of his penis being decapitated!

ItsSoooFluffy · 10/10/2013 22:59

Do hope that the Op is ok and comes back to us soon!

WantonPleasure · 10/10/2013 22:58

There's enough strangeness in this thread to last a lifetime, but I've just thought of another odd thing that doesn't seem to have been addressed so far.
Since Sara has only had sex with one man there's only a limited number of ways she could have got the idea of a clean-up station.
From him? From her mother? From his mother!
And were they given the clean-up station and dunking beaker as a wedding gift?
We should be told.

Frank1313 · 10/10/2013 22:45

I couldn't help but anagram your name and the best one that came of for Sara Crewe was........ Screw Area. haha

marziecat · 10/10/2013 22:44

Dipping your penis in a beaker,
Is one way to make it cleaner.
But better by far,
Is to dip it in tar,
Its shiny and it leaves it sleeker.

Bugeyedbetty · 10/10/2013 22:43

This has entertained me all evening! One thing MN needs is a 'like comment' button as you have all had me in stitches tonight! (As she goes off to find that 'special' green beaker ;)

largerleon · 10/10/2013 22:39

Absolutely brilliant Grin Grin that's two evenings now I've been entertained by this thread! Stomach aching & tears rolling down my face!

Do hope OP is ok, has anyone heard from her yet?

Fwiw we just don't do it. 4 kids, no time lol. OH wanks occasionally I believe Blush