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The utterly ridiculous / hysterical comments your friends come out with, in which you seriously question if they live on the same planet as you...[lighttheart]

594 replies

daughterofafarmer · 02/10/2013 11:26

My friend said this utter gem last week...

'I'm buying DS a 2nd pair of Wellingtons as I don't have an Aga to help dry out the wet pair....'

Another friend

'I don't think one should children until you can afford childcare'....Que me nearly spitting out my drink...

OP posts:
steppemum · 04/10/2013 23:03

blackberry - you have the excuse that it was taught in school for years!

Anais, the clue is in the name - Swansea is by the sea. (no beaches here in swindon)

and the name swindon comes from swine on a hill ( I will leave it to your over active stereotype of swindon imaginations to make a link between pigs, hills and our lovely city!)

Blackberrybakewell · 04/10/2013 22:56

This thread is hilarious!

Husband's friend thought the sun and the moon were the same thing.

Someone else me had a heated debate with a colleague about taste buds. They I thought different areas of the tongue tasted different flavours (sweet, salty etc.) Turns out that's a load of old codswallop resulting from a misinterpreted document 100 years ago. Had to swallow my pride on that one!

AndHarry · 04/10/2013 22:42

My DH was, until a couple of months ago, under the impression that women wee and give birth through the same orifice. We have been married for a few years and he's watched me give birth to his two children Hmm

A lovely friend asked me once what the lovely fruit was in trifle. It turned out that she meant the jelly-saturated sponge :o

TheOneWithTheNicestSmile · 04/10/2013 22:25

when I lived down south I used to be the same about Southport & Stockport, Anais

(They couldn't be more different!)

AnaisHendricks · 04/10/2013 22:20

oldsilver you must have come across DH and BIL. They used to adore going into Poundland and asking the prices of everything!

DH does a similar thing at ToysRUs when the checkout person asks if he needs batteries.

AnaisHendricks · 04/10/2013 22:18

I am always getting Swindon and Swansea confused Blush

oldsilver · 04/10/2013 21:45

Another Trivial Pursuit one overheard ... How deep is a water polo pool? "Well it can't be that deep, otherwise the horses would drown." And she was serious.

And in Poundland - heard far too many times over the years "How much is this?"

JADS · 04/10/2013 20:21

I have a collegue who is lovely, but a bit daft. I was telling her that I was moving to Cardiff from London. She looked aghast and said that's miles away, how long will the flight take? I said I would drive there and it would take 3 hours. She looked surprised - turned out she thought Cardiff was in Scotland!

rednellie · 04/10/2013 20:21

I can't get over the pronunciation of biopic. I'm sure I've never heard anyone say it bio pic and not rhymed it with myopic. But I've googled, about 50 times and all it's come back with is little computer voices going bio pic.

My world view is shattered. And normally it's DH who mispronounces things...

quietbatperson · 04/10/2013 19:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AmberLeaf · 04/10/2013 19:08

Yes it was Norwich! I was looking at the destination on the front/end of the train though, I think it was abbreviated so that's my excuse Blush

quietbatperson · 04/10/2013 19:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

nicename · 04/10/2013 19:03

You had PB wallpaper. I'm really jealous!

AnaisHendricks · 04/10/2013 19:02

Don't worry, MissStrawberry, he is absolutely real. I know this because he was on my childhood wallpaper.

MissStrawberry · 04/10/2013 18:59

He must be real. We have a video of him, a bag and a purse, several Bears, curtains, had a plate and cups, stickarounds, a jumper. You can't make all that stuff out of someone who doesn't exist!

AnaisHendricks · 04/10/2013 18:48

Happy Holocaust Shock

Although autocorrect often suggests it in place of the word "holiday"

nicename · 04/10/2013 18:36

Of course he's real. They even have a statue of him in the station.

MrsRajeshKoothrappali · 04/10/2013 18:31

Paddington's real.

I've seen him on the telly.

Wink
MissStrawberry · 04/10/2013 18:27

ShockShock

Paddington isn't real????

SadSadSadSadShock

TheOneWithTheNicestSmile · 04/10/2013 18:24

JesusInTheCabbageVan, yours is one of my most favourite MN nicknames Smile

(psst, nicename - Lima is real, but Paddington Bear isn't Wink)

nicename · 04/10/2013 18:08

Now Camberwell I know (only because I went to art school there!). Please tell me Lima, Peru (where Paddington is from) is real!

MissStrawberry · 04/10/2013 17:10

With a username like that, JesusInTheCabbageVan, should you have put good God?Wink.

JesusInTheCabbageVan · 04/10/2013 17:02

aNutAboveTheBreast Loving your friends, especially the "drop baby on the floor" one.

"Happy Holocaust" though - good god Shock

Blatherskite · 04/10/2013 16:57

I queued from about 7am to get DS into swimming lessons Blush With a 4/5 month old baby (DS) in my arms Blush Blush

To be fair, he is now a brilliant swimmer (I only wanted him not to almost drown like I did when young) and a parent at school was complaining to me just last week that lessons at that pool (the only one close by) are impossible to get into and he'd been trying for 3 terms now to get her a place!! If you start with the baby class you get first dibs when it comes time to moving up and getting siblings in so it was worth it in the end.

paperclipsarebetterthanstaples · 04/10/2013 16:49

'women who scream in childbirth should be ashamed, how embarrassing'

From my lovely, childfree so far, friend