Please or to access all these features

Mumsnet classics

Relive the funniest, most unforgettable threads. For a daily dose of Mumsnet’s best bits, sign up for Mumsnet's daily newsletter.

The utterly ridiculous / hysterical comments your friends come out with, in which you seriously question if they live on the same planet as you...[lighttheart]

594 replies

daughterofafarmer · 02/10/2013 11:26

My friend said this utter gem last week...

'I'm buying DS a 2nd pair of Wellingtons as I don't have an Aga to help dry out the wet pair....'

Another friend

'I don't think one should children until you can afford childcare'....Que me nearly spitting out my drink...

OP posts:
threestars · 03/10/2013 15:08

In my general studies A level I was asked what subject you'd be studying if you attended the Slade. I said you'd be studying to be a prison officer Blush. Thanks, Porridge.

In Key West, they make a big deal about the beautiful sunset. I overheard a tourist ask a tour guide how many sunsets they get every day.

CheerfulYank · 03/10/2013 15:02

Oh yes LeGav I suppose most of us do that. :) What do you do? Just a bite at time? But then you have to keep your fork in your wrong hand? Confused

LeGavrOrf · 03/10/2013 15:00

I noticed that my American friends cut things up, and then put their knives down, swap their forks over to their right hands and eat with their fork only.

I don't know if this is a universally american way of eating. But it's got to beat the English way of eating peas, I must say.

swannylovesu · 03/10/2013 14:59

DH "whats that film where Denzel washington plays that black dude"

Me "erm...all of his films" Hmm

CheerfulYank · 03/10/2013 14:58

These....are....AMAZING. :o

Though, I still don't get what we Americans are doing with our knives that you aren't.

LadyBigtoes · 03/10/2013 14:53

"To Be Decided Later" is a fantastic name for a book about religion! Someone should write it.

Batman is not a superhero? Does that mean he can't do anything fancy but just dresses up?! I'm shocked!

I'm also with Rooners on the tampax. I also could only manage the very smallest and eventually gave them up as too much of a faff.

nicename · 03/10/2013 14:53

I suppose its marginally better than being told it was because you wouldn't be able to have babies if you played footie/rugby etc (or drove a car).

hellsbells76 · 03/10/2013 14:50

MintyDiamonds us girls weren't allowed to play rugby in middle school in case the balls hit us in the chest area and caused breast cancer. Our PE teacher was deadly serious. FFS.

LeGavrOrf · 03/10/2013 14:44

I always say it like myopic. Bloody hell am I wrong!

Mind you I went round for years in my teens saying truculent wrongly.

My fault for appropriating a word used commonly in Jilly Cooper novels which I had never heard in real life.

FreedomOfTheTess · 03/10/2013 14:43

One of my American cousins was here visiting the UK for the first time, this was about six years ago, and she was very excited about seeing London.

The night before her trip to London, she said to me, "I cannot wait to see the Tower of London, I've heard so many great things about it." I responded by telling her it was one of my favourite London landmarks, mentioning how old it is. Cousin then came out with this gem...

"How old is it, I'm assuming its pre-First World War?!"

Seriously.

My response? "Oh yes, of course, but only by 800-and-30-something years, so not by much!"

If I could have had her thrown out the country, I would have done! Wink

HeartsTrumpDiamonds · 03/10/2013 14:42

Say it, I mean

HeartsTrumpDiamonds · 03/10/2013 14:42

Building that is how I would do it.

buildingmycorestrength · 03/10/2013 14:38

I want to pronounce the same was as biopsy (short o, emphasis on bi, no emphasis on pic) but I get the feeling it is 'bio' (like bio washing powder, long o) and then 'pic' (with some emphasis), like a hyphenated word? Is that right?

SoleSource · 03/10/2013 14:37

Was Moses involved in the digging of the Channel Tunnel then? Did he part the English Channel? Confused

SPBisResisting · 03/10/2013 14:36

Oh like biopsy?

SPBisResisting · 03/10/2013 14:34

How do you pronounce biopic

Peetle · 03/10/2013 14:32

Back to the Channel Tunnel: I spent ages arguing with a work colleague when it was being dug. They could not understand why it was quicker to dig it from both ends and meet in the middle instead of just digging it from one end.

And there are many tunnels around the world (Hong Kong for a start) that are made by sinking metal segments onto the sea floor and then linking them up.

KhunZhoop · 03/10/2013 14:28

Someone I know me used to think that "twat" was the female form of "twit".

WillSingForCake · 03/10/2013 14:23

I was in the car with my friend when 'Hollaback Girl' by Gwen Stefani came on the radio. Friend asked "is Hollaback the name of one of the US states?" Hmm

ShowOfBloodyStumps · 03/10/2013 14:15

Batman is a ruddy great show off.

Iron Man I get. DD adores Iron Man.

ShowOfBloodyStumps · 03/10/2013 14:11

I still want to rhyme it with myopic. In my head I do.

Yeah, I assumed Batman could fly and shit. In my defence, I'd never watched or read any Batman. I just assumed he was like Spiderman. You know, part bat.

HeartsTrumpDiamonds · 03/10/2013 14:06

Ironman could kick Batman's arse. Fact.

Rooners · 03/10/2013 14:03

I know it's unrelated but I think Megamind is brilliant. Especially the bit where Titan spells out his name and he thinks it is 'tighten'. Grin

LeGavrOrf · 03/10/2013 14:00

Batman is just an attention seeker.

KirjavaTheCorpse · 03/10/2013 13:59

"What colour is a black person's blood? Is it brown?" Hmm

"Where does Lebanese food originate, like, what country? I've never heard of a place called Leban"

Swipe left for the next trending thread