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Original poster

The utterly ridiculous / hysterical comments your friends come out with, in which you seriously question if they live on the same planet as you...[lighttheart]

594 replies

daughterofafarmer · 02/10/2013 11:26

My friend said this utter gem last week...

'I'm buying DS a 2nd pair of Wellingtons as I don't have an Aga to help dry out the wet pair....'

Another friend

'I don't think one should children until you can afford childcare'....Que me nearly spitting out my drink...

OP posts:
bundaberg · 03/10/2013 21:23

well, technically there are 3.

one from the bladder, one from the testes and one from the seminal vesicle (that's why men who have had the snip still ejaculate)

bundaberg · 03/10/2013 21:22

there are 2 which join together into one, fairly high up.

so there are not 2 tubes which run down the penis

DaleyBump · 03/10/2013 21:20

No, there are two. One from balls, one from bladder.

CatThiefKeith · 03/10/2013 21:17

Friend looking at the property section in the local paper:

"Where's sought after?"

Me: Eh? IN what context?

Friend: "There are loads of houses round there for sale, is it local?"

JellyMould · 03/10/2013 21:17

um that diagram shows one tube.

Stepawayfromthezebras · 03/10/2013 21:16

stinkingbishop my lovely Aunty once asked me if me and my twin sis are psychotic Smile

AnaisHendricks · 03/10/2013 21:10

Yes, two tubes, and thank God there are

DaleyBump · 03/10/2013 21:08

SDTG, here's a wee link. There are two tubes Wink

Chesntoots · 03/10/2013 21:07

Reading about the Welsh section A reminded me of the time I advertised my gorgeous flea-bitten gray... I didn't bother replying to some of those either.

Rooners · 03/10/2013 21:00
cocoleBOO · 03/10/2013 20:48

Yes Blush.

He still thinks it.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 03/10/2013 20:48

Dh told me, in all seriousness, that there are two tubes down the penis - one for urine and the other for semen. I told his mum she should ask for a refund on his education. Grin

buildingmycorestrength · 03/10/2013 20:32

cocoleBOO isn't that kittens or something? Shock

cocoleBOO · 03/10/2013 20:15

DH thought that babies didn't open their eyes until they were 6 weeks old. He even said this after we had children Confused.

Ericaequites · 03/10/2013 19:39

One of my folks' employees thought babies were born without earlobes and fingernails, and those would grow in later until his first child was born. He had a university degree.

AnaisHendricks · 03/10/2013 18:59

XBF whinging after a lovely summer BBQ birthday party:

"My parents are so bloody inconsiderate (a familiar theme) never to have thought of doing this sort of thing on my birthday"

Erm, possibly because you were born at the end of November?

ShowOfBloodyStumps · 03/10/2013 18:55

Peetle, I suppose that's where the confusion arises. There aretunnels across rivers (is the Hong Kong one the road that's something like the most congested road in HK?) but they're a couple of kilometres along a river bed. The channel is about 30 miles and probably about 100m deep. The logistics of an immersion tunnel would be interesting though they were saying on the radio a while ago that they're constructing one in Denmark or somewhere which will be 11 miles but is going to take another ten years they reckon.

HeartsTrumpDiamonds · 03/10/2013 18:47

Gav I guess it is a bit like Eindhoven, especially pronunciation wise... Grin

ShowOfBloodyStumps · 03/10/2013 18:44

Correct pronunciation of biopic is indeed bio (as in non bio) pic as opposed to by oppic which I want it to be.

My grandma would disown me if I didn't keep my knife in my right hand and fork in my left at all times whilst eating. And none of this holding a knife like a pen business which is just plain common.

LeGavrOrf · 03/10/2013 18:42

I was nearly 30 before I realised Andover was not in the Netherlands.

I was on the a303 and looked all surprised at the sign.

In my defence, it sounds Dutch.

CharityFunDay · 03/10/2013 18:39

Lunchtime conversation during a temp job many years ago (packing preg test kits, if you must know).

Me and a man and a woman at a table in the restroom.

Bloke takes out a thermos and pours himself a coffee.

Me: ^^ If vacuum flasks prevent the transmission of heat, how come we can feel the heat of the sun, even though space is a vacuum?

Woman ^^: Space isn't a vacuum.

Me: Of course it is. Why do you think astronauts wear spacesuits?

Woman: To help them float.

GemmaTheCakeyLady · 03/10/2013 18:32

"Are turkeys bigger than chickens?'
Genuine question from a 24yr old!!

My BFF and I use this as a catch-phrase now to signal someone saying/doing something dumb!

cocoleBOO · 03/10/2013 17:34

I cut my food up and just use my fork in my right hand, more than once someone has sniffily said," you're not American you know." Took me years to figure out what it meant.

Last week we passed a field of cows, one was having a wee and DD(12) was surprised to see it peeing standing up. She thought they cocked their legs like a dog Hmm.

ScarerAndFuck · 03/10/2013 17:21

I love the idea of you following a cake Retro. Grin

Pagwatch · 03/10/2013 17:18

When the news that Argentina had invaded the Falkland Island I was sitting with a bunch of professional folk with degrees who were horrified by an unprovoked attack on a bunch of Islands just off the coast of Scotland.