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Original poster

Explain Children's TV Shows to me.

163 replies

TiggyD · 06/07/2013 21:52

I work in childcare and need to keep up to date with children's TV shows so I know what the kids are on about. Please could you explain a show each in just one sentence. And please could somebody do Ben 10?!

eg,
Teletubbies:
4 coloured blobs with various antenae prance about life eating toast and custard aided by a possessed hoover.

OP posts:
cocolepew · 07/07/2013 11:47

Mr Benn, man comes out of the closet dressed as one of the Village People.

Original poster
TiggyD · 07/07/2013 11:47

Yes Panzee and Shipwrecked!

OP posts:
cocolepew · 07/07/2013 11:45

Spongebob Squarepants, tender tale of inter species gay love, set in an underwater utopia.
With burgers.

ShipwreckedAndComatose · 07/07/2013 11:25

Bod!!

Panzee · 07/07/2013 11:22

Are these retro Tiggy? The second one is sounding like Jamie and his Magic Torch.

Original poster
TiggyD · 07/07/2013 10:36

Guess the programmes:

World's most boring boy and his most boring friends have adventures interupted by milkshake addicted frog conductor.

Boy has defective torch that gives off hallucinogenic gasses every night.

Creepy goody goodies have fun paid for by you, and groom young children with the promise of badges.

OP posts:
Dontlookbehindyou · 07/07/2013 10:27

What's the big idea- Hugo, bizarre boy in a jumpsuit asks toddlers questions about dying and sadness at far too early o'clock.

I will rest my case with Dhs name for mike the knight. In our house its called mike the twat.

MeanAndMeaslyMiddleAges · 07/07/2013 09:58

Let's Play - A woman can do anything a man can! Sid gets all the crap jobs.

JulieAnderton · 07/07/2013 09:35

What's the big idea?

Sinister looking alien channels Descates asking questions such as "what does it mean to learn something?".

TheMagicKeyCanFuckOff · 07/07/2013 09:25

Get Well Soon:

A man is obsessed with poo.

So much so, he is allowed to do a show which is practically all about poo.

He lives out his happy poo fantasies whilst occasionally helping the puppets with various illnesses and making toddlers think they're GP will be hot (and setting them up for a lot of sadness in the future).

BelleEtLaBaby · 07/07/2013 08:48

Andy's Wild Adventures. Who cares what it's about? Andy's in it, and quite often his shirt gets wet... Blush

ZenGardener · 07/07/2013 08:36

I'm impressed. I never actually watch these programs, I just dump my kids in front of them while I get on with other stuff.

I do like the music on Jake and the Neverland Pirates.

Timmy's incessant baa-ing drives me mental.

I have never been able to figure out what Pokemon is about. I don't actually think it is about anything.

PseudoBadger · 07/07/2013 08:26

Olly the Little White Van - Justin Fletcher continues his master plan towards world domination. Voicing a singing and dancing motor vehicle is just another step on the way.

Kveta · 07/07/2013 08:25

Tweenies: brightly coloured teratomas infiltrate children's daycare centre, and cause nightmares.

Mr Maker: boggle-eyed loon traps small people inside shape costumes then forces them to dance for his pleasure, whilst he mixes glue with paint, and colours in rubbish before it hits the bin.

Timmy Time: wee lamb goes to nursery with his friends, and not much happens, but it does so delightfully.

Pingu: anarchy at the South Pole!

Tree Fu Tom: fuck knows.

ShipwreckedAndComatose · 07/07/2013 08:22

Sparkle, best description yet! Grin

ShipwreckedAndComatose · 07/07/2013 08:16

Adventure Time: Finn and his dog do LSD and trip big time.

PoppyWearer · 07/07/2013 08:04

City of Friends - as crap as it sounds.

Mr Men - ten billion times more shit than you remember it being. Now with jazzy music, proper animation (which surely wasn't the point?) and politically-correct names. And American accents.

Roobarb and Custard - exactly the same as in the 80's. That's better!

Mr Moon - made it to bedtime, thank fuck for that!

sparkle101 · 07/07/2013 08:01

What is most worrying though is in my just woken up state when I saw what I thought was a children's show of big cock little cock Shock

sparkle101 · 07/07/2013 08:00

In the night garden.

Various characters run around the garden doing things such as chasing a ball, chasing a bed, chasing a life.

Iggle piggle: blue, annoying, often drunk and falls over at the first sign if trouble, surgically attached to red blanket.

Upsy daisy: hussy, likes to go round kissing iggle piggle very often. Inflates her skirt to dance and shows off her pants. Has a bed that follows her around. Need I say more?

Makka pakka: an anaemic turd looking character who has OCD with regards to collecting stones and washing things: people's faces, stones etc. He appears very lonely and ostracised from the iggle piggle/upsy daisy stuff.

Pontypines: two adults, eight children living in one room. Mrs pontypine a voyeur who watches everything through binoculars. No control over kids can often find one behind a tree and another in a plant pot.

Tombliboos: three annoying ones who lose their trousers at first sign of trouble, play music really badly and share a bed. Hmmmm.

The wottingers: who?

OodPi · 07/07/2013 07:42

Sarah and Duck- girl & duck have adventures with talking inanimate objects or tslking knitting done by their neighbour.
Total genius.
Our family favourite!

RippingYarns · 07/07/2013 07:17

Dennis and Gnasher

Another crushing reminder that things just ain't what they used to be

TripTheLightFanjotastic · 07/07/2013 06:41

Justin's House - Noel's House Party for children

JanePlanet · 07/07/2013 06:18

Rhyme Rocket - the BBC's way of demonstrating to license payers that they really are trying to make budget stretch.

Jelly Jam - an animated representation of a nervous breakdown.

PseudoBadger · 07/07/2013 06:03

Zingzillas - the hallucinations of a poor sloth at Whipsnade Zoo who has been slipped LSD by visiting school children.

WandaDoff · 07/07/2013 00:57

Special Agent Oso - Useless cunt.

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